(no subject)
so after my previous conclusions and what i'm going to be doing to change some things i already feel better about myself. i know i'm more of a serious person...but that's just how i am. it's tough to be me when surrounded by immature people. it's not fair to them, for me to snap and it's not fair to me to always be annoyed. so in that sense i'm done sugarcoating things, which i tried not to much anyway, and if someone can't handle it then i really don't care. i can say what i can, as can most everyone, but i can't force anyone to listen or grow up.
this diet i feel good about as well. they have more than enough tasty recipes along with other no cook meals for lazy/busy days. exercising will honestly be the toughest part, i think, for me. it's just something i hate doing. the meals i can stick to, i'm honestly not worried. the first week will be the hardest, but still. i'm going to this with a good mind set because i feel good about it. whatever i lose before vacation i do. i'm doing this for no one but myself, which is how it should be. i'll start monday for sure even if i make some of the things this weekend just because. i bought more pills since i was running low and i also bought the book (both off amazon) so that i can return the library book and still have it. it's broken into 3 phases, but whenever i'm ready i can move to the next phase. just cutting back on things will be a major help, and the pill for it is a fat blocker to help block the worse fat. every diet needs fat, your body uses/needs it, but i like how the system works. cut back a lot and teach you, then add some more fat but keep the calories the same and work out and stuff. either way the diet will be helpful, which is what i need. and it's all broken down for me so i'm not wondering and trying to figure things out.
also making me feel more adult is...i do want to settle down. not right this instant, but i'll be ready when the time comes. i have found a dress i'm in love with i just hope it'll still be around when the time comes. even more surprising...is i might want kids. i'm still iffy about the actually delivering them thing, but i dunno. for hating kids, i can see myself with some. errr, wat? lol. maybe it's part of being female and getting older. i know i'm not OLD but i'm not getting any younger. i just feel more mature about knowing what i'd like, but not rushing out to make it happen. i want to be ready....but even admitting all this is a step. i've fought against it forever...never wanted it or thought it possible that i'd want to actually be with someone like that, let alone married to them. but i can see it, though not yet =)
just finally figuring out what i'd honestly like to do and work toward making it happen. i don't spend enough time on myself so this is needed. i would like someone, yes, but i know i have to be happy with myself before things ever went that far. being happy with myself, as most know, would be a miracle in itself, eh? lol. and though things have been rough with chris and people in general lately i haven't sunk. i'm doing fine and can pull out of it. i can do this, i can, and i like that feeling.
look! an actual real update =)
this diet i feel good about as well. they have more than enough tasty recipes along with other no cook meals for lazy/busy days. exercising will honestly be the toughest part, i think, for me. it's just something i hate doing. the meals i can stick to, i'm honestly not worried. the first week will be the hardest, but still. i'm going to this with a good mind set because i feel good about it. whatever i lose before vacation i do. i'm doing this for no one but myself, which is how it should be. i'll start monday for sure even if i make some of the things this weekend just because. i bought more pills since i was running low and i also bought the book (both off amazon) so that i can return the library book and still have it. it's broken into 3 phases, but whenever i'm ready i can move to the next phase. just cutting back on things will be a major help, and the pill for it is a fat blocker to help block the worse fat. every diet needs fat, your body uses/needs it, but i like how the system works. cut back a lot and teach you, then add some more fat but keep the calories the same and work out and stuff. either way the diet will be helpful, which is what i need. and it's all broken down for me so i'm not wondering and trying to figure things out.
also making me feel more adult is...i do want to settle down. not right this instant, but i'll be ready when the time comes. i have found a dress i'm in love with i just hope it'll still be around when the time comes. even more surprising...is i might want kids. i'm still iffy about the actually delivering them thing, but i dunno. for hating kids, i can see myself with some. errr, wat? lol. maybe it's part of being female and getting older. i know i'm not OLD but i'm not getting any younger. i just feel more mature about knowing what i'd like, but not rushing out to make it happen. i want to be ready....but even admitting all this is a step. i've fought against it forever...never wanted it or thought it possible that i'd want to actually be with someone like that, let alone married to them. but i can see it, though not yet =)
just finally figuring out what i'd honestly like to do and work toward making it happen. i don't spend enough time on myself so this is needed. i would like someone, yes, but i know i have to be happy with myself before things ever went that far. being happy with myself, as most know, would be a miracle in itself, eh? lol. and though things have been rough with chris and people in general lately i haven't sunk. i'm doing fine and can pull out of it. i can do this, i can, and i like that feeling.
look! an actual real update =)