After yet again being dumped because I'm nothing, and with pretty much all my best friends having no time for me I really don't have any reason to come here
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You pushed me away, again, Dc. You were the one who sent me a doomsday farewell message on MSN shortly before my birthday, you were the one who wouldn't talk to me and let me try to help. You're the one who won't talk to me anymore and YOU are the one who told me to "forget about you". Which, I haven't. And I won't. You are my friend and self-proclaimed brother. That will not go away just by you saying for me to forget. That is NOT how it works and I don't exactly appreciate you playing me as some evil villain who hurt poor little Dc once again when YOU are the one who is breaking the hearts of EVERYONE who loves you by doing this. You do have people to talk to and you do have friends. You have people who love you and who care about you. You just don't want to see that anymore. As was made painfully obvious by this journal entry and the IMs you sent me without giving me a chance for a response that made me fear for your life.
--- Dc, don't go to the trouble of thanking me. Allow me to thank you. I thank you for making me afraid that every second of every day you might kill yourself like you've threatened so many times. Because I do. Every day since that doomsday MSN message I worry about you and I hope that you're okay.
Most importantly, though, I thank you for letting me know you for the short while that you did.
I'm still here and still standing at your side. If you should choose to take the time to look over and actually see me for me - I'll be waiting, when you're able to let yourself be, Dc. I have yet to leave you like you seem so intent to believe and need.
I still love you, my friend and my brother.
Take care of yourself. No one else can take care of you for yourself.
...
You pushed me away, again, Dc. You were the one who sent me a doomsday farewell message on MSN shortly before my birthday, you were the one who wouldn't talk to me and let me try to help. You're the one who won't talk to me anymore and YOU are the one who told me to "forget about you". Which, I haven't. And I won't. You are my friend and self-proclaimed brother. That will not go away just by you saying for me to forget. That is NOT how it works and I don't exactly appreciate you playing me as some evil villain who hurt poor little Dc once again when YOU are the one who is breaking the hearts of EVERYONE who loves you by doing this. You do have people to talk to and you do have friends. You have people who love you and who care about you. You just don't want to see that anymore. As was made painfully obvious by this journal entry and the IMs you sent me without giving me a chance for a response that made me fear for your life.
---
Dc, don't go to the trouble of thanking me. Allow me to thank you. I thank you for making me afraid that every second of every day you might kill yourself like you've threatened so many times. Because I do. Every day since that doomsday MSN message I worry about you and I hope that you're okay.
Most importantly, though, I thank you for letting me know you for the short while that you did.
I'm still here and still standing at your side. If you should choose to take the time to look over and actually see me for me - I'll be waiting, when you're able to let yourself be, Dc. I have yet to leave you like you seem so intent to believe and need.
I still love you, my friend and my brother.
Take care of yourself. No one else can take care of you for yourself.
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