Chapter 10...
Ta-da!
Title: The Lost King
Author: The Grin Reaper
Pairings: Peter/Caspian, Caspian/Peter, Caspian/Susan
Genre: Romance/Angst
Rating: PG for implications
Word Count: 2,400
Summary: Ever since his return from Narnia, Peter has been getting into fights and feels lost in life. He wants to return to Narnia, but mostly, he wants to see the prince he fought alongside.
Chapter 10-The Sensitive Ones
Peter was euphoric the rest of the morning. He had had a dream in which Caspian kissed him, he had kissed Caspian on the cheek before he could wake up, and he hadn’t gotten into one fight today. It was a good day for the eldest Pevensie boy. When meeting up with Edmund after school, Peter seemed to be in the happiest mood his brother had witnessed him in. It must have irked him a little because he asked, “Er, Pete, you seem rather…different today.”
“What?” Peter immediately changed into his normal self. “Oh, well…” I got to kiss Caspian…though, I admit, it wasn’t exactly how I wanted it to happen…because Caspian wasn’t exactly awake to feel it.
Edmund waited when Peter didn’t continue. “Sorry,” Peter said, clearing his throat, “I’m allowed to be happy, right?”
“Well, yeah,” Edmund said, as if it was obvious, “but I don’t recall ever seeing you this happy before.”
Peter blushed a little as he turned to stare out the window of the train they were on. The sun was shining brightly overhead. There was hardly any cloud in the sky. This would be the perfect day for an outing with Caspian.
“The doctor’s supposed to stop by today.” Edmund said, his tone grave.
Peter stopped fantasizing out the window. That’s right, he almost completely forgot that Susan had called the doctor to check up on Lucy. He sighed as he hoped she would be okay. He couldn’t bear the thought of Lucy being in more pain than he was already at the thought of Caspian and Susan getting together. Though it was a different kind of pain, he still felt that Lucy should at least feel better enough to go back to Narnia whenever she was called to go.
“When?” Peter asked, not looking at anything in particular.
“Around four. He wanted to stop by when all of us would be there.” Edmund said.
“Susan told you.” Peter said, not bothering to turn the phrase into a question.
Edmund nodded and Peter felt his fist tighten slightly.
“Well, that’s fine then. I suppose an outing was a stupid idea anyhow.” Peter said sourly.
Edmund turned to him immediately, “What outing?”
“I was going to show Caspian around, maybe take him to the park or show him the country area.” Peter admitted.
“By yourself?” Edmund asked incredulously.
Peter’s brow furrowed. Surely it wasn’t that strange to take another person out sightseeing…
Before Peter could answer, Edmund continued, “I mean, were you going to keep this all to yourself or were you eventually going to tell me about it as well?”
“W-well,” Peter stammered, thinking about his options. If he left Edmund out of it, it would seem suspicious on his part and he didn’t like Edmund being suspicious of him and Caspian, but on the other hand, if Edmund were there, he couldn’t be as open as he was hoping to be with the prince.
“I was going to tell you. You can come, if you like.” Peter cursed in his head at his decision. It was obvious that Edmund wanted to see Caspian just as much as he did…but for different reasons. Edmund liked Caspian because he had someone to learn from, someone to swordfight with and play checkers with. Peter couldn’t care less about all those things as long as Caspian was with him.
Edmund then said excitedly, “All right! I’ll bring my kite along.”
Peter was about to say it wasn’t necessary, but then thought about it a bit more. If Edmund was distracted by other things, that meant more time alone with Caspian. Instead of foiling his brother’s plan, he agreed that he should bring it.
“I’m pretty sure Narnia doesn’t have any kites.” Edmund said, smiling.
“And if they did, would they look the same as the ones here?” Peter wondered.
“That’s a good idea, Pete, showing Caspian around and all. I wonder how much it would cost to take him to see Buckingham Palace. He’d like that.”
“But it doesn’t look anything like a castle. We may have to visit Scotland in order to make him feel more at home.” Peter said.
“I don’t think the Underground goes all the way to Scotland, Pete.” Edmund teased.
“True.” Peter said, grinning. They spent the remainder of the ride home discussing various sites to take Caspian to. The top ones were Stonehenge, Big Ben, and Hyde Park.
In getting off the train, they were still on the subject of whether to take Caspian to Scotland or not when Edmund suddenly changed the subject.
“What d’you reckon Caspian’ll do once he finds out about Susan and what’s-his-face?”
Peter hesitated before answering. It was the first time they brought up Susan since they mentioned the doctor coming to visit.
“Go after James, I suppose.” Peter muttered.
“I can see that happening.” Edmund commented. “I mean, it seems like he still has feelings for her and all.”
Peter didn’t say anything. He was hoping maybe the present he left Caspian this morning had sunk in, but at the same time didn’t want to think about what would happen if Caspian rejected him. It was better just not to say anything.
They reached the house in no time and Edmund clambered up the stairs, calling Caspian’s name. Peter was slower at responding. His day had been so good up until now. Why did Edmund have to mention the obvious feelings Caspian had for Susan…again? It was even more obvious that she didn’t really return the same feelings, but Peter knew the prince would not give up so easily. The thought made his stomach cringe. Then, before he could go upstairs, he heard something from the hallway past the stairs. He paused as he leaned around the banister to tell what it was. He heard hushed voices and curiosity got the best of him as he crept closer to where the voices were coming from. A door down the hall was partially open and Peter stopped right in front of it, listening. He recognized the voices immediately.
“…No, tell me the truth. Why did you come here?”
It was Susan’s voice.
“I came here because Aslan wanted-”
“Just admit it, Caspian. You came because you thought you could win my heart back, is that it?”
Peter heard a short silence, then Caspian spoke hesitantly, “I thought that is what you wanted…”
“Caspian,” Susan sighed, “you live in Narnia. That is your home. Aslan said I wouldn’t be going back. You have to forget about me. I can’t be with you.”
“But you’re with me now.” Caspian told her.
“Not for much longer,” Susan said. Peter had a feeling she would open the door and quickly stepped behind it as it opened. Peter made sure not to move as he heard her hurry up the stairs. He then heard another set of feet move from outside the room. Caspian. Peter tried to keep it together and heard as Caspian walked away. He waited to make sure Caspian was no longer in sight as Peter left the upsetting scene. He was angry, angry with Caspian for trying to win Susan’s heart even though that was virtually impossible to accomplish.
As Peter stalked into his room, Edmund turned to ask him where Caspian was. Instead of answering, Peter knocked the lamp off his bedside table, sending it crashing to the floor. He didn’t care about picking up the pieces and couldn’t care less what Edmund thought right now about his behavior.
Peter knew Edmund must have been staring at him from his side of the room as he called hesitantly, “Pete?”
“Leave.” Peter said quietly, sitting on his bed rigidly, his hands hiding his eyes, as if he didn’t want Edmund to see him this way.
“Wha-?”
“I said leave!” Peter said furiously, looking up at him with dangerous eyes.
Edmund looked afraid as he took a book for school out of the room, closing the door behind him. After his brother left the room, Peter felt the tears start to form and roll down his cheeks. He was crying. He couldn’t believe that after just overhearing Caspian talking to Susan he was shedding tears. He should have known something like this would happen. He had made the first move toward Caspian and the prince had no idea. He still tried to win Peter’s sister’s heart. Peter wanted to tell Caspian how he felt, but if he kept kissing him when he was asleep, he may never get the message.
Peter now wished things had been different. He wanted to return to Narnia so that he could see Caspian again. But Caspian was here, in his house. Even so, Peter had no idea how long Caspian intended to stay.
KNOCK! KNOCK!
Peter cried to whomever was at the door, “Go away!”
He heard the faint sound of his voice say, “Peter, can I talk to you, please?”
“No!” Peter shouted.
Contrary to his words, Caspian opened the door. Peter turned to glare at him.
“What part of ‘go away’ don’t you understand?”
“I am sorry,” Caspian said, obviously downtrodden. “You are upset.”
“Obviously!” Peter exclaimed.
“You are upset at me?” Caspian asked, pointing to his chest. When Peter didn’t say anything, the prince took a seat on Edmund’s bed as he asked, “What have I done to make you mad at me? I haven’t seen you since you came home.”
Peter resisted the urge to say ‘you broke my heart by trying to confess love to my sister’ and instead said, “I overheard you talking to my sister.”
Caspian seemed ashamed and hung his head, averting the Pevensie’s eyes. “I am sorry you had to hear that. I am not trying to…my intentions were rash. I hope you will forgive me.”
Peter blinked at him with a blank expression on his face. Caspian wanted his forgiveness? It was almost as if Peter had caught Caspian cheating on him. Peter wanted to take the distraught man in his arms and hold him close, but knew that Caspian wasn’t that stupid and would surely know what Peter’s intentions were. He therefore decided to pry, “Why ask for my forgiveness? Shouldn’t you ask it of my sister?”
“But she is your sister! You are her brother and her protector. Therefore, if she rejects me, I can come to you for support. I do not intend to steal her away from you. I merely wondered…I keep lingering on that day, when she kissed me.”
Peter closed his eyes, trying to erase the dreaded memory from his mind. Everyone kept bringing that up. Why couldn’t anyone just accept that it was something anyone would have done if they thought they would never see another ever again?
Caspian must have noticed Peter’s expression as he asked, “Peter, are you all right?”
“I’m fine,” Peter told him, trying to keep himself together.
Caspian wasn’t as easily convinced as he stood up from Edmund’s bed to move next to Peter. Peter felt the weight of the bed shift as Caspian sat next to him, wrapping a comforting arm around his back. Peter envisioned a weird sense of déjà-vu as he thought over how many times Caspian had laid his arm around Peter in a normal comforting way. Peter breathed slowly, trying to calm himself now, realizing that Caspian was here next to him. Slowly, Peter regarded Caspian carefully. His dark brown eyes bore deep into space as Peter kept staring into them. He hardly realized how close he had gotten to Caspian’s face until the prince spoke, “Er, Peter?”
“Oh,” Peter brought his face back, hiding his blush that was hot on his cheeks now. “Sorry.”
“No, I am sorry if I still have not won your trust.”
“My trust?” Peter asked, not fully comprehending what the prince was saying, considering he was still lingering on the prince's deep eyes.
“Yes, as Susan’s brother, I must win your trust.”
Peter couldn’t believe what he was hearing. Susan obviously rejected Caspian once, yet the prince was going to try again. Peter just decided to tell Caspian.
“Caspian, do you remember when Edmund mentioned James?”
Caspian thought for a second or two, then nodded slowly, eyebrows knitted in confusion.
“Well,” Peter sighed, “They’re dating now.”
“Dating?” Caspian asked, unfamiliar with the word.
“Susan’s seeing him. They’re together.”
Caspian’s expression changed from confusion to shock to utter disappointment. “She never mentioned that.”
“That’s because she didn’t want to hurt you. Susan’s complicated. She’s not that easy to get.”
“But, I thought…back in Narnia…I impressed her.”
Peter was having difficulty not screaming out loud as he still tried to convince Caspian that Susan wasn’t for him.
“Maybe, but now, Susan knows she isn’t going back to Narnia, so she wanted to resume her usual life here.”
Caspian seemed upset again. Peter hated having to keep convincing him that Susan wasn’t for him, but Caspian wouldn’t stop.
“So, she doesn’t want to be with me?”
No, Caspian, I want to be with you! Peter simply shook his head. Caspian hung his head again and sighed. Peter now felt compelled to wrap his arm around the prince’s shoulders. As he did so, he squeezed Caspian’s shoulder slightly, making Caspian look up at him and before he knew it, Caspian had embraced him. Peter had no complaints about it and rubbed his back soothingly. He could feel the dark-haired man’s tears dampen his shirt, but his own started to form as well, dripping into Caspian’s hair. The more he realized how pitiful the two of them looked right now, the more he wanted to go somewhere private. After all, Edmund shared a room with him and never knocked first, though Peter had kicked him out, so he could be sure he wasn’t coming back for a while.
Just in case, Peter pushed Caspian away slowly as he said, “Not here.”
Caspian looked confused and Peter bit his tongue furiously as he realized what had just come out of his mouth.
“Sorry,” he said. “I just meant…had Edmund come in just now and saw us…”
“No, I understand.” Caspian said with a smile. Peter couldn’t be sure what the prince was thinking but he guessed it had nothing to do with Susan. Sticking to that comforting thought, Peter tried a new conversation.
“So, do you know how to play cricket?”
A/N: Everything I intend to write somehow gets twisted around into something completely different. There will be an explanation next chapter on why they aren't going sightseeing and why they're playing cricket instead.
Title: The Lost King
Author: The Grin Reaper
Pairings: Peter/Caspian, Caspian/Peter, Caspian/Susan
Genre: Romance/Angst
Rating: PG for implications
Word Count: 2,400
Summary: Ever since his return from Narnia, Peter has been getting into fights and feels lost in life. He wants to return to Narnia, but mostly, he wants to see the prince he fought alongside.
Chapter 10-The Sensitive Ones
Peter was euphoric the rest of the morning. He had had a dream in which Caspian kissed him, he had kissed Caspian on the cheek before he could wake up, and he hadn’t gotten into one fight today. It was a good day for the eldest Pevensie boy. When meeting up with Edmund after school, Peter seemed to be in the happiest mood his brother had witnessed him in. It must have irked him a little because he asked, “Er, Pete, you seem rather…different today.”
“What?” Peter immediately changed into his normal self. “Oh, well…” I got to kiss Caspian…though, I admit, it wasn’t exactly how I wanted it to happen…because Caspian wasn’t exactly awake to feel it.
Edmund waited when Peter didn’t continue. “Sorry,” Peter said, clearing his throat, “I’m allowed to be happy, right?”
“Well, yeah,” Edmund said, as if it was obvious, “but I don’t recall ever seeing you this happy before.”
Peter blushed a little as he turned to stare out the window of the train they were on. The sun was shining brightly overhead. There was hardly any cloud in the sky. This would be the perfect day for an outing with Caspian.
“The doctor’s supposed to stop by today.” Edmund said, his tone grave.
Peter stopped fantasizing out the window. That’s right, he almost completely forgot that Susan had called the doctor to check up on Lucy. He sighed as he hoped she would be okay. He couldn’t bear the thought of Lucy being in more pain than he was already at the thought of Caspian and Susan getting together. Though it was a different kind of pain, he still felt that Lucy should at least feel better enough to go back to Narnia whenever she was called to go.
“When?” Peter asked, not looking at anything in particular.
“Around four. He wanted to stop by when all of us would be there.” Edmund said.
“Susan told you.” Peter said, not bothering to turn the phrase into a question.
Edmund nodded and Peter felt his fist tighten slightly.
“Well, that’s fine then. I suppose an outing was a stupid idea anyhow.” Peter said sourly.
Edmund turned to him immediately, “What outing?”
“I was going to show Caspian around, maybe take him to the park or show him the country area.” Peter admitted.
“By yourself?” Edmund asked incredulously.
Peter’s brow furrowed. Surely it wasn’t that strange to take another person out sightseeing…
Before Peter could answer, Edmund continued, “I mean, were you going to keep this all to yourself or were you eventually going to tell me about it as well?”
“W-well,” Peter stammered, thinking about his options. If he left Edmund out of it, it would seem suspicious on his part and he didn’t like Edmund being suspicious of him and Caspian, but on the other hand, if Edmund were there, he couldn’t be as open as he was hoping to be with the prince.
“I was going to tell you. You can come, if you like.” Peter cursed in his head at his decision. It was obvious that Edmund wanted to see Caspian just as much as he did…but for different reasons. Edmund liked Caspian because he had someone to learn from, someone to swordfight with and play checkers with. Peter couldn’t care less about all those things as long as Caspian was with him.
Edmund then said excitedly, “All right! I’ll bring my kite along.”
Peter was about to say it wasn’t necessary, but then thought about it a bit more. If Edmund was distracted by other things, that meant more time alone with Caspian. Instead of foiling his brother’s plan, he agreed that he should bring it.
“I’m pretty sure Narnia doesn’t have any kites.” Edmund said, smiling.
“And if they did, would they look the same as the ones here?” Peter wondered.
“That’s a good idea, Pete, showing Caspian around and all. I wonder how much it would cost to take him to see Buckingham Palace. He’d like that.”
“But it doesn’t look anything like a castle. We may have to visit Scotland in order to make him feel more at home.” Peter said.
“I don’t think the Underground goes all the way to Scotland, Pete.” Edmund teased.
“True.” Peter said, grinning. They spent the remainder of the ride home discussing various sites to take Caspian to. The top ones were Stonehenge, Big Ben, and Hyde Park.
In getting off the train, they were still on the subject of whether to take Caspian to Scotland or not when Edmund suddenly changed the subject.
“What d’you reckon Caspian’ll do once he finds out about Susan and what’s-his-face?”
Peter hesitated before answering. It was the first time they brought up Susan since they mentioned the doctor coming to visit.
“Go after James, I suppose.” Peter muttered.
“I can see that happening.” Edmund commented. “I mean, it seems like he still has feelings for her and all.”
Peter didn’t say anything. He was hoping maybe the present he left Caspian this morning had sunk in, but at the same time didn’t want to think about what would happen if Caspian rejected him. It was better just not to say anything.
They reached the house in no time and Edmund clambered up the stairs, calling Caspian’s name. Peter was slower at responding. His day had been so good up until now. Why did Edmund have to mention the obvious feelings Caspian had for Susan…again? It was even more obvious that she didn’t really return the same feelings, but Peter knew the prince would not give up so easily. The thought made his stomach cringe. Then, before he could go upstairs, he heard something from the hallway past the stairs. He paused as he leaned around the banister to tell what it was. He heard hushed voices and curiosity got the best of him as he crept closer to where the voices were coming from. A door down the hall was partially open and Peter stopped right in front of it, listening. He recognized the voices immediately.
“…No, tell me the truth. Why did you come here?”
It was Susan’s voice.
“I came here because Aslan wanted-”
“Just admit it, Caspian. You came because you thought you could win my heart back, is that it?”
Peter heard a short silence, then Caspian spoke hesitantly, “I thought that is what you wanted…”
“Caspian,” Susan sighed, “you live in Narnia. That is your home. Aslan said I wouldn’t be going back. You have to forget about me. I can’t be with you.”
“But you’re with me now.” Caspian told her.
“Not for much longer,” Susan said. Peter had a feeling she would open the door and quickly stepped behind it as it opened. Peter made sure not to move as he heard her hurry up the stairs. He then heard another set of feet move from outside the room. Caspian. Peter tried to keep it together and heard as Caspian walked away. He waited to make sure Caspian was no longer in sight as Peter left the upsetting scene. He was angry, angry with Caspian for trying to win Susan’s heart even though that was virtually impossible to accomplish.
As Peter stalked into his room, Edmund turned to ask him where Caspian was. Instead of answering, Peter knocked the lamp off his bedside table, sending it crashing to the floor. He didn’t care about picking up the pieces and couldn’t care less what Edmund thought right now about his behavior.
Peter knew Edmund must have been staring at him from his side of the room as he called hesitantly, “Pete?”
“Leave.” Peter said quietly, sitting on his bed rigidly, his hands hiding his eyes, as if he didn’t want Edmund to see him this way.
“Wha-?”
“I said leave!” Peter said furiously, looking up at him with dangerous eyes.
Edmund looked afraid as he took a book for school out of the room, closing the door behind him. After his brother left the room, Peter felt the tears start to form and roll down his cheeks. He was crying. He couldn’t believe that after just overhearing Caspian talking to Susan he was shedding tears. He should have known something like this would happen. He had made the first move toward Caspian and the prince had no idea. He still tried to win Peter’s sister’s heart. Peter wanted to tell Caspian how he felt, but if he kept kissing him when he was asleep, he may never get the message.
Peter now wished things had been different. He wanted to return to Narnia so that he could see Caspian again. But Caspian was here, in his house. Even so, Peter had no idea how long Caspian intended to stay.
KNOCK! KNOCK!
Peter cried to whomever was at the door, “Go away!”
He heard the faint sound of his voice say, “Peter, can I talk to you, please?”
“No!” Peter shouted.
Contrary to his words, Caspian opened the door. Peter turned to glare at him.
“What part of ‘go away’ don’t you understand?”
“I am sorry,” Caspian said, obviously downtrodden. “You are upset.”
“Obviously!” Peter exclaimed.
“You are upset at me?” Caspian asked, pointing to his chest. When Peter didn’t say anything, the prince took a seat on Edmund’s bed as he asked, “What have I done to make you mad at me? I haven’t seen you since you came home.”
Peter resisted the urge to say ‘you broke my heart by trying to confess love to my sister’ and instead said, “I overheard you talking to my sister.”
Caspian seemed ashamed and hung his head, averting the Pevensie’s eyes. “I am sorry you had to hear that. I am not trying to…my intentions were rash. I hope you will forgive me.”
Peter blinked at him with a blank expression on his face. Caspian wanted his forgiveness? It was almost as if Peter had caught Caspian cheating on him. Peter wanted to take the distraught man in his arms and hold him close, but knew that Caspian wasn’t that stupid and would surely know what Peter’s intentions were. He therefore decided to pry, “Why ask for my forgiveness? Shouldn’t you ask it of my sister?”
“But she is your sister! You are her brother and her protector. Therefore, if she rejects me, I can come to you for support. I do not intend to steal her away from you. I merely wondered…I keep lingering on that day, when she kissed me.”
Peter closed his eyes, trying to erase the dreaded memory from his mind. Everyone kept bringing that up. Why couldn’t anyone just accept that it was something anyone would have done if they thought they would never see another ever again?
Caspian must have noticed Peter’s expression as he asked, “Peter, are you all right?”
“I’m fine,” Peter told him, trying to keep himself together.
Caspian wasn’t as easily convinced as he stood up from Edmund’s bed to move next to Peter. Peter felt the weight of the bed shift as Caspian sat next to him, wrapping a comforting arm around his back. Peter envisioned a weird sense of déjà-vu as he thought over how many times Caspian had laid his arm around Peter in a normal comforting way. Peter breathed slowly, trying to calm himself now, realizing that Caspian was here next to him. Slowly, Peter regarded Caspian carefully. His dark brown eyes bore deep into space as Peter kept staring into them. He hardly realized how close he had gotten to Caspian’s face until the prince spoke, “Er, Peter?”
“Oh,” Peter brought his face back, hiding his blush that was hot on his cheeks now. “Sorry.”
“No, I am sorry if I still have not won your trust.”
“My trust?” Peter asked, not fully comprehending what the prince was saying, considering he was still lingering on the prince's deep eyes.
“Yes, as Susan’s brother, I must win your trust.”
Peter couldn’t believe what he was hearing. Susan obviously rejected Caspian once, yet the prince was going to try again. Peter just decided to tell Caspian.
“Caspian, do you remember when Edmund mentioned James?”
Caspian thought for a second or two, then nodded slowly, eyebrows knitted in confusion.
“Well,” Peter sighed, “They’re dating now.”
“Dating?” Caspian asked, unfamiliar with the word.
“Susan’s seeing him. They’re together.”
Caspian’s expression changed from confusion to shock to utter disappointment. “She never mentioned that.”
“That’s because she didn’t want to hurt you. Susan’s complicated. She’s not that easy to get.”
“But, I thought…back in Narnia…I impressed her.”
Peter was having difficulty not screaming out loud as he still tried to convince Caspian that Susan wasn’t for him.
“Maybe, but now, Susan knows she isn’t going back to Narnia, so she wanted to resume her usual life here.”
Caspian seemed upset again. Peter hated having to keep convincing him that Susan wasn’t for him, but Caspian wouldn’t stop.
“So, she doesn’t want to be with me?”
No, Caspian, I want to be with you! Peter simply shook his head. Caspian hung his head again and sighed. Peter now felt compelled to wrap his arm around the prince’s shoulders. As he did so, he squeezed Caspian’s shoulder slightly, making Caspian look up at him and before he knew it, Caspian had embraced him. Peter had no complaints about it and rubbed his back soothingly. He could feel the dark-haired man’s tears dampen his shirt, but his own started to form as well, dripping into Caspian’s hair. The more he realized how pitiful the two of them looked right now, the more he wanted to go somewhere private. After all, Edmund shared a room with him and never knocked first, though Peter had kicked him out, so he could be sure he wasn’t coming back for a while.
Just in case, Peter pushed Caspian away slowly as he said, “Not here.”
Caspian looked confused and Peter bit his tongue furiously as he realized what had just come out of his mouth.
“Sorry,” he said. “I just meant…had Edmund come in just now and saw us…”
“No, I understand.” Caspian said with a smile. Peter couldn’t be sure what the prince was thinking but he guessed it had nothing to do with Susan. Sticking to that comforting thought, Peter tried a new conversation.
“So, do you know how to play cricket?”
A/N: Everything I intend to write somehow gets twisted around into something completely different. There will be an explanation next chapter on why they aren't going sightseeing and why they're playing cricket instead.