Disconnect

[dark_amaranth]

I wonder how many people exist in relationships in which they reside in their own private fantasy, and all external happenings are somehow transformed and reinterpreted to fit their notion of what they would like the relationship to be. This is probably completely vague, but I can't give any specific instances.

The only example that remotely comes

Comments

[mylifewill]

the fiction-to-reality disconnect happens because the natures of the "troubles" are wrong.

it's not that guys (and as for a working definition of "guys," we'll go with "heterosexual, non-douchebag human males interested/capable of sustaining a relationship"... antonyms: kevin federline, any male featured on hotchickswithdouchebags.com, my honors advisor) aren't willing to be patient with someone they care about. it's simply that no single guy ever sits by himself thinking, "damn. i want to marry a total bitch who does nothing except throw tantrums and create drama." that doesn't mean that guys don't want to be with strong-willed women. rather, i find that the opposite is beginning to be true; the universal popularity of my sassy girl and juno should attest to that, although they do kind of take the crying female things too far towards the end, depending on the perspective and reasons. however, emotions are good too; nobody wants to be with an emotionless lump.

and, yes, what could be a greater testament to love than going through shit together? however... throwing tantrums and creating drama and being all proud of the "i'm high maintenance" thing doesn't drag a couple through shit together. it drags the guy through shit that the girl creates. nobody even wants to be friends with the annoying, bitchy kid. why would they want to be in a relationship with them?! that doesn't make sense!!

as far as the idea of a person goes, i don't think that's wrong. perhaps one's perception of a person may be skewed by wishful thinking, or perhaps one has just read a particular individual incorrectly. i was going to write a blurb in here about nihilism and how our brains only know what our senses can perceive, and so what our brains know of reality may or may not be accurate in the least. instead, i think i'll refrain from that.

so long though, as you can generate the IDEA of a person, you have the ability to generate the standards for those things which are important to you, consciously or unconsciously. with that comes the ability to find what you are looking for.

second thoughts

[mylifewill]

of course, i could be totally wrong.

i told do yeob once that the girl from my sassy girl would be perfect. he dropped his jaw but quickly regained his trademark composure, remarking that i must be crazy.