STOP DOING THAT, FARSCAPE FANDOM!
Oh my God, y'all. Fandom has done so much to make me more aware of my privilege and give me context for social justice concepts. And yeah, that sounds really fucking wanky so what I mean is: fandom has made me aware of when I'm being an unthinking, privileged asshat and has made me far more able to see the problematic bits in my culture, my beliefs
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Thanks. I can have a sense of humor about myself (I'm physically disabled, and my siblings refer to me as "prey" ;) but it really makes me angry when people are so nasty to people like my brother. He's part of a fabulous Special Equestrian program that includes kids with all sorts of physical and mental disabilities and every one of these families has experienced ridicule, name calling, and being treated like trash, usually by folks that really should know better. I've seen strangers in line at the grocery store, or on the bus, harass others with obvious disabilities for no reason whatsoever. Many people are wonderful, but many are awful, imo.
I don't know what's so horrible about being thoughtful. I remember being told years ago, very nicely, that it's better to use "Inuit" than "Eskimo". That was new to me, but I switched terms without ever feeling like I was being oppressed, bullied, tortured by political correctness, etc. It hasn't had an effect on my life AT ALL, but could possibly avoid a small hurt in someone else's. Why wouldn't I switch?
And I will never understand the need for some people who "hate PC" to lump very real slights together with nonsense. It's like the "If gays marry, toasters and dolphins will be next!!!!" crowd.
I've tried really hard not to be That Person in this fandom, but it's hard to bite your tongue when someone's hitting all your race triggers. Having said that, I probably wouldn't do it again so we can be cowards together. Like you, I just don't have the energy to be told I'm wrong by privileged asses [my word, not yours! ;)].
It'll be fun to have company ;)
Although wait until the "Chiana wasn't really raped at the casinos or at any other point in her life because a)she's a slut, so she probably liked it, and b)you know she's prostituted herself in the past and you can't rape a whore" discussion cycles around again.
Sexual violence/slut shaming conversations are a place where I can't and won't shut up and save my energy.
I've got a fair bit of privilege going on (white, middle class, bisexual but married to a man) but with my health issues, my brother, a history of sexual abuse, and having grown up in poverty, it's very easy to empathize with the other side. I'm grateful for that.
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Was nodding along until my brain came to a screeching halt over:
Although wait until the "Chiana wasn't really raped at the casinos or at any other point in her life because a)she's a slut, so she probably liked it, and b)you know she's prostituted herself in the past and you can't rape a whore" discussion cycles around again.
I'll cheerlead if you need to smack some people.
I've got a fair bit of privilege too though I have been on the other side a little bit. I get by because I don't look very PoC necessarily, so I get all the cultural privileges of being PoC and all the social privileges of not. Thing is, I like being what I am and I dislike bigotry so race stuff sends me into frothing rage. I'm trying to tone it down, particularly on the net because I don't entirely subscribe to the 'it's not my job to teach you race relations 101.' If you don't know and I do, I think it's my job to point it out and explain further if you want to learn (you being a generalised reference and not you personally), but it's not my job to dry your tears for you and make your actions palatable.
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No worries! I take so long in responding to things at times that people wonder if I'm still alive ;)
I'll cheerlead if you need to smack some people.
Thanks ;) Luckily I'm not alone in my outrage, and the worst comments I've seen happened before I discovered the fandom - digging through old conversations and threads on various boards and journals can sometimes be fascinating, sometimes infuriating, although Firecracker was usually there to point out the stupidity and medieval thinking.
Still, things pop up now and then, especially when discussing S4, and discussions about John & Chiana tend to become minefield of slurs against her character (I think that's why I was on the defensive with you at one point). From some fans I've gathered Chiana's not a perfect saint like Aeryn, and as a fallen woman threatens the purity of his penis and true love, even if they're just friends who might find each other attractive *rolls eyes*
The most frustrating discussion I've taken part in in recent memory was with several men who were claiming nothing had happened to Chi between seasons, she was just a bitch for no reason in S4, everything I pointed out was dismissed, they didn't see it so it wasn't there, etc. One was rewatching, one watching for the first time - when we got to Twice Shy the new guy suddenly saw it and apologized, which was gratifying.
If you don't know and I do, I think it's my job to point it out and explain further if you want to learn (you being a generalised reference and not you personally), but it's not my job to dry your tears for you and make your actions palatable.
That's pretty much exactly how I feel about sex, sexual violence, and gender issues. If you ever see me say something that's full of race fail let me know - it's out of ignorance, and I welcome knowledge :)
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I can believe it happened, though you might need to point me to what I was saying/implying so that I don't do it again, because unfortunately it's not ringing any bells. :(
Happily or unhappily, I haven't seen conversations like the ones you're describing. I *am* still really annoyed that the rapes were not addressed on the show, but I haven't read a lot of fan discussion about it.
And likewise, if I'm full of gender!fail, please tell me.
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That's actually a relief to me, because I knew I was being overly prickly, didn't want to be, but couldn't stop myself ;) It was the discussion about whether or not John cares about people other than Aeryn and the baby.
Happily or unhappily, I haven't seen conversations like the ones you're describing.
Some of the older ones that were before my time are in this forum, if I'm remembering correctly (I don't bookmark them and try to bleach my brain afterwards) http://www.watchfarscape.com/forums/
. I *am* still really annoyed that the rapes were not addressed on the show
I used to like the way they "handled" it, in that I thought the refusal of the characters to openly talk about it was realistic, and Chiana's so rarely in the spotlight anyway, and Gigi does such a phenomenal job having it color her performance that I was satisfied...I can see things in her behavior in multiple episodes that are meaningful to me...but then I'm an obsessive Chi fan and know what I'm looking at. I think it's easy for a lot of fans to miss. I was happy with the subtlety of Ben's performance too, and thought not tackling it head on was better than trying and failing miserably and offensively.
But then I watched The Shield and Aceveda's rape and it ruined me for all other portrayals of sexual assault and its aftermath on television. So painfully realistic it was triggering and often made me physically ill, but I also appreciated the unblinking, unvarnished honesty of it, and felt it was a cathartic experience in the end.
The fic for John & Chiana in this regard is great, but I really, REALLY wish the show itself had done more with it.
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That's actually a relief to me, because I knew I was being overly prickly, didn't want to be, but couldn't stop myself ;) It was the discussion about whether or not John cares about people other than Aeryn and the baby.
Oh, now I do remember this a little. IIRC I was talking about why it made sense for the showrunners to just have J/A and bb!D in that last shot of PKW, right? Hmm. Leaving aside my own feeling that the last scene should've been about D'argo's death because Farscape usually highlights the cost and not the benefit, I think I said that the way I see it is John's pretty focused on his three-person nuclear family first and everyone else second. That's still how I read the ending, though I don't mean it as an attack on John+Chi's relationship at all or as a slur against *Chi's* character. I don't know if that helps or hurts? Sorry if it hurts. :(
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I don't know if it's something I'm imagining or not, but I really love Aeryn's treatment of Chiana in A Prefect Murder. She is firm, but patient and kind. Coming after Chiana's freak-out in Natural Election, and her confession of sorts in I Shrink, I think it's meaningful, and a lovely display of friendship, especially with what she's going through herself and contrasted with D'Argo's harshness.
I think I said that the way I see it is John's pretty focused on his three-person nuclear family first and everyone else second. That's still how I read the ending, though I don't mean it as an attack on John+Chi's relationship at all or as a slur against *Chi's* character. I don't know if that helps or hurts? Sorry if it hurts. :(
No no no! I totally agree with this - it's completely right and natural for John to have Aeryn & the sprog as #1 in his heart, everyone else 2nd. I think I was In A Mood that day, remembering past arguments (with shippers who essentially view Chi, D'Argo, Rygel etc as props), and allowing that to shade what you were saying. There's a huge difference between "2nd but loved" and "inconsequential", and I owe you an apology for thinking you were saying the latter :)
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Nah, you don't owe me an apology. I didn't feel uncomfortable with what you were saying on the thread at TF at all.
And tbh, my favourite part of John Quixote is that Chiana is so much more badass than John! Well, that and the whole oral sex imagery going on with D'argo eating baked beans out of Jool's stomach. Oh, Ben. What on earth were you smoking when you wrote that script?
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