Kurt's Crush
Title: Kurt's Crush
Rating: PG
Word Count: 1,662
Pairings: Kurtbastian, unrequited Kurtcedes
Warnings: -none-
Summary: AU Season 1 where Kurt has a crush on Sebastian, who is a Senior, instead of Finn.
He was two years older than Kurt, busy with thoughts of college applications and apartment searches. He was tall and confident and lean and handsome where Kurt was still boyish and unsure. He was ‘out’ and undeniably active on that front, with no need to apologize for what he was or who he was attracted to. His face was open, his laughter carefree, and his eyes always sparkled with mischievity. He was Sebastian Smythe and he was so out of Kurt’s league.
Kurt sighed heavily as he glanced across the courtyard where Sebastian was leaning next to his sister against the park fence that was more decorative than economical or useful. They were eating ice cream and Sebastian was talking about something that didn’t seem overly interesting to his sister, but Kurt had been straining to even to pick up at least a few words. His best friend, Mercedes huffed in frustration at him and it pulled Kurt from his wistful staring with a small jolt.
“Earth to Kurt,” she said, her voice sharpened by exasperation.
“Sorry, ‘cedes,” said Kurt, turning his focus back to his friend sitting across the picnic table from him. “You were saying?”
Mercedes’ annoyance flickered into something a little unsure for a brief moment and it was nearly miraculous that Kurt even caught it considering that beautiful laughter that suddenly bubbled up from behind her in that same moment. Without his permission, Kurt’s eyes flicked past her to land on Sebastian again. He was laughing, hard, leaning over with the weight of his amusement and nearly losing his scoop of vanilla ice cream where it sat precariously atop the cone in his left hand.
Kurt wanted to be the one to make Sebastian laugh like that; actually, even more than that, Kurt wanted to be the one to find out if the taste of vanilla ice cream was better when licked from Sebastian’s tongue instead of straight from the source. His cheeks pinked at the thought, so sudden and so foreign from his usual fantasies that he only ever allowed himself in the anonymous dark of his bedroom at night. Normally, his thoughts of love and romance were just that; lovely and romantic, never were they so brash as being about the strict physicality of it. Sebastian, with his gorgeous face and his delicious body and his tempting… everything, just seemed to be bringing that side out of Kurt lately.
Before he could go further down that train of thought, though, and probably embarrass himself publicly, Kurt pushed the thoughts aside and forced his attention back on Mercedes. She must have still been dealing with her own thoughts, because she hadn’t seemed to notice his wandering attention this time around.
Despite his mind’s meanderings, his brow furrowed slightly in confusion and mild concern at the look on Mercedes’ face.
“What’s on your mind?” he prompted.
“I was just thinking,” started Mercedes, fiddling with the plastic wrap from her sandwich before taking a breath and meeting Kurt’s eyes. “It’s time we made it official… don’t you think?”
The furrow of Kurt’s brow grew deeper before he forced his face neutral for the sake of future wrinkles.
“What do you mean?” he asked when it seemed like Mercedes wasn’t going to continue without further prompting.
“Us,” she said, laughing nervously.
Kurt opened his mouth and closed it a few times, unsure if he heard her correctly.
“We’re practically dating as it is,” she explained with a small shrug.
“’Cedes,” started Kurt, unsure of what to say.
Wasn’t it obvious to her like it was to all the boys who called him names and pushing him around? Didn’t the entire school already know? Perhaps he wasn’t as obvious as he thought, perhaps he still had a chance at fitting in, and perhaps it was all just guessing on the bullies’ parts. He should tell her, though; she’s his best friend after all.
Kurt looked past her at Sebastian and his sister, Julie; a few other kids had joined them by that point. There was no way Kurt would ever be able to be so gracefully ‘out’ in backwards Lima, Ohio. He didn’t have the confidence and charisma that Sebastian did to make up for it. He’d come out… one day… when he was in New York, following his dreams and living life to the fullest. For now though…
“I’m sorry Mercedes,” said Kurt, turning back to give her a regretful smile. “You’re my best friend and I don’t want to hurt you but… I’m in love with someone else.”
Mercedes gasped, her face falling suddenly and heart-breakingly.
“Who?” she exclaimed in a strained voice.
Kurt’s eyes flicked to Sebastian without permission.
“The Warbler Boy’s sister?” she asked incredulously.
“Yes,” sighed out Kurt. “Sebastian’s sister. She’s beautiful and… and… well, it’s just a little crush, anyway, but…”
“Right,” said Mercedes, frowning insecurely down at the remains of her lunch.
“You’re beautiful, too, Mercedes,” said Kurt, smiling softly at her.
“Not beautiful enough,” she mumbled and Kurt’s heart plummeted, but there was no helping how he felt, even if it was the other Smythe he felt that way for.
Mercedes quickly packed together the leftovers of her lunch. Kurt watched her with a sad frown on his face, but wasn’t sure what to say. He felt terrible being the one to show her how awful rejection felt, but he couldn’t bring himself to come clean -and perhaps it wouldn’t make a difference to her feelings, it was still a rejection after all. Silently, he watched as Mercedes stormed off before heaving a sigh and turning his attention down to his lunch in front of him, though he wasn’t feel very hungry any more.
“Hey, there, Cutie,” came a smooth, masculine voice with a cocky lilt that was so familiar and yet startling as it had never been used to address him before. “Trouble with your girlfriend?”
Kurt looked up from where he had been idly pushing his salad around in the plastic container. His heart suddenly jumped into his throat and his mind instantly numbed with the shock of having those green eyes focused on him. Sebastian was standing next to the picnic table, leaning lazily against it.
“Um, she’s not my… girlfriend,” he mumbled, looking away as he felt heat grow in his cheeks.
“Oh, he knows, Honey,” spoke up Sebastian’s sister, Julie, her voice sharp but her grin amused, as she stepped up beside him. “I’m sure we all know you’re not one for girls.”
Kurt bit his lip and looked away with an indignant sniff, trying to keep some semblance of his airy armor in place.
“Lay off him, Jules,” warned Sebastian, causing Kurt to hastily turn his focus back on him. “He can’t help that he’s so virginal.”
Kurt’s frown returned before it barely had a chance to turn hopeful.
“No doubt,” scoffed Sebastian’s sister, sneering down at Kurt with her head tilted to the side in a judging manner. “It must be hard to get laid with such a harsh case of gay-face.”
Eyes widening, Kurt dropped his fork and looked up sharply at the two Smythes. It probably wasn’t the cruelest of insults thrown at him, but for some reason, it hit hardest. He glanced at Sebastian to see how he would react and was stunned to see him chuckling softly.
“I thought you were gay,” said Kurt, drawing in with confusion and hurt.
Sure, his unrequited crush was kind of pathetic considering Sebastian was so incredibly out of his league, but at least he wasn’t straight… or so Kurt had always thought. Even if Sebastian Smythe never returned Kurt's feelings, it had always been nice to see him, a fellow member of his 'team', succeed, even within the underbelly of a bigoted community such as theirs, and to know Kurt wasn't alone. He had been so certain of Sebastian's sexuality, but in that moment, Kurt's doubts were clawing at his throat.
“Cute,” chuckled Sebastian, with a slight shake of his head and Kurt could tell from the look on the boy's face that Kurt’s secret crush on him was suddenly not so secret. Damn. “There’s a difference between fucking guys and being… lady fabulous, Princess.”
Kurt’s pinking cheeks full-out flushed with colour at that.
“Did you,” started Kurt, but he stopped to swallow and take a deep breath before continuing in a slightly more biting tone. “Did you have a reason for coming over here or…?”
Sebastian’s grin only grew at that. He opened his mouth to speak but his sister pulled on his arm and rolled her eyes.
“C’mon, Sebby,” she said in annoyance. “Lunch break is almost over and I don’t want to spend the last of it talking to this loser.”
With a nod of assent, Sebastian was rid of her. She walked away, swaying her hips and looking around the park for the rest of their group who must have gone off ahead of them when they had stopped at Kurt’s table. Kurt was about to let out a sigh of relief when he realized Sebastian was still nearby and had actually moved so he was looming directly over Kurt. He shuddered involuntarily when he felt Sebastian’s breath against his ear and the side of his neck. His eyes fluttering shut when Sebastian began to whisper.
“Chin up, Sweetheart,” he whispered in a low voice that made Kurt’s toes curl. “That whole blushing-virgin thing you got going on… totally has potential.”
Kurt exhaled shakily when Sebastian had straightened and stepped outside of his personal space. Sebastian pressed his half-eaten ice-cream cone into Kurt's hand and Kurt stared at it incredulously. He looked up in time to see the older boy give him a cocky smile and little wink before sauntering off in the direction his younger sister had gone. Kurt watched him go while he waited for the feeling to return to his face and knees. Potential? Kurt sure hoped so.
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Based off this.