(no subject)
what does it mean to be human and be in love and have all these important emotions?? well I am still trying to figure that out I mean I know that I am alive and everything tells me that I am human. I love someone unconditionally and will never stopp loving them in the way. sometimes life takes it's toll on the individual and the gods decide to just pluck away the simple enjoyments of life as the years go by. and it is the same for everyone on the planet. as we get old we get tired of what used to be considered fun and we do what is called growing up and become adults where we all find that life isn't as simple as we once thought. now for me I used to just love to go out and enjoy walking and now I can't because I am constantly on the go and never have to time for it and so in doing so it doesn't get to be on my list. I mean I am pushing 40 plus hour weeks at work and they are talking about giving me even more hours and that means that I won't be able to ever get out. I mean I work almost every day now and I haven't had a day off (and I mean a really good day off) since I went on vacation in july. I mean I used to go out and play D&D or what ever else and now I don't even have time to play a couple minutes of a video game before going to bed. sure I talk to people online when I get home(well that one special person) but they will always come first in my personal life. but with work I have had to put aside everything I used to just do for the fun of it. I haven't seen a movie since hitchhiker's guide to the galaxy came out in the theatres and that was like 3 monthes ago and that was and early showing and I had to drag a friend to go see it with me because I hate to watch a movie in the theatres alone because if I am alone it isn't as enjoyable because I don't have anyone to talk to. and even if I wanted to now I couldn't because everyone I would want to go see a movie with me is either out of town or in class when I am available. I work nights and my chedule is so fucked up that I have no social life other the one person I talk to online and so I am stuck just being a loner yet again and doing things on my own. and now it is looking like I have no need to be at work on a friday night since they have had like 10 cooks working at the same time and there is never a need for that many unless it is at lunch but a friday night???? more peole come to work to drink than to order food and so those of us who help out with the prep work end up sitting with our thumbs up our asses when Prep is done because we can't just clock out. thankfully i amm going to find out about getting every day off that there is a concert or a game going on that way I don't have to cook because I know that everyone there can do their thing and there was little point for that many to be there after the game started. the largest order we got was like 4 people ordering and nothing was for me. Don't get me wrong I don't mind getting payed to do nothing but I know that it looks bad on the management for having that many people working when it is dead. but they don't seem to care. oh well. anyway that is enough of me ranting and raving about the toils of work. enjoy and thanks your gods that you have what you have.