Been a long time...
Well journal, it seems I have stumbled upon you again... It always seems like I only write in here when I'm in need of someone to talk to... But this time is a lil different... I have so many people I could talk to... But I just rather not talk to them for some reason...
I dunno what to do with my life anymore... I get mixed signals from the person that I love and it hurts me sooooo much... I don't kno what to do anymore with myself... One moment I'm really happy and then next minute I wanna die... I REALLY wanted to go to Homecoming with him but it didnt work out... If he knew that I felt this strong for him a lot of things would change... I want to stop loving him, but it's sooo hard to do... One minute I have myself convinced that I'm over him and then next minute I am back in love with him... Because he likes to fuck with my mind or something... Oh well... Enough about this bullshyt... Moving on.....
Homecoming Game: I had a pretty fun time at the Homecoming game... There were some sad parts to it... But I don't wanna talk about it.... It started out Brie and I did some errands and then we went to the field at 6:30 and then we all started warming up to get ready to sing the national anthem... That was exciting... I love singing the national anthem with the Senority girls... It's soooo much fun... Then after that we just walked around the game and talked with people... Brie and I saw Danielle Petersen... She is soooo nice, she gave me her cell phone number so we can call her and tell her when the next concert is cuz she wants to come see us... Then after we saw her we saw Jenny at the gates and the dumbass guard was like "I'm sorry but u gotta step back from the gates!" "You can talk to Jenny once she gets into the game!" and I was like "W/e!" and walked away... That fucking piece of shyt guard... lol... N e wayz... So then after that we found Dustin and hung out with him... then Brie and I went to the concession stand cuz we wanted some water and we saw Christina Szjana there or as Joe Jelsone would say "Christina Vagina" lol... Joe is fucken hilarious... So we talked to her when we were in line and then we went up to the blechers and we saw our PIMP! We haven't seen him in sooooo long.... He's going to the Alternative school now so we never get to see him so then we talked with him for a while and got his phone number and then he left and then we saw Jose!!! We were just talking about how much we missed him too and so we hung out with him and tried to find the "male cheerleader"... I'd rather not say his name...lol... Then we got Jose's new cell number and then after that we just hung out with Dustin and Rodway and then we all left... I wanted to stay the whole game cuz it was sorta my goal... But everyone was leaving because the parking lot would have been busy... But I stayed until the last 3 minutes of the game... So i was basically there the whole time... And of course... We won... 21-6 I think... Then after that we found Brian and then hung out with him for a lil while... We stopped at Danielles and I talked to a few peeps and then Brian picked me up and then we went back there and Brian went into the party and then Brian didn't feel good so we left and he dropped off Brie and then he dropped off me and since I was drinkin that night I was a lil tipsy so I didn't want my mom to see me that way so I took a walk around my complex and tried to cool off... It helped... While on the walk I supposedly called Kirk and left a message on his phone... The once I got home he called back... and he came over at like 12:30 and we talked with my mom for a lil bit and then him and I went for a walk around the lake in my complex... It was fun... We ended up sitting down on the bench and just talked for an hour and a half... We really had a fun time... We really connected.... It was fun... It's weird how fast time goes by when u r just talking about everything with your best friend.... So we didn't get back to my house until like 2:00am and my mom was calling his cell phone but he didnt realize it... and I left my cell phone at my house so I didn't know she was trying to get a hold of us... So when we got back she was like "I was trying to call u guys!" and we were like "Oh... Sorry..." and then he's like "Well I gotta go I'm a half hour late, my mom's gonna be pissed"...Then he left and I watched tv for a lil bit and then went to bed...
Homecoming Night: Well I didn't go to the dance... Instead I hung out with Kirk, Brie and Dustin... We had a jolly time... lol... Sittin on some random patches of grass just kickin it there with our beers and smirnoffs... It was a fun time... We all had a nice long conversation about random shyt... It was kool... Then after that we dropped Dustin off at his car and then Kirk and I dropped off Brie and then Kirk and I went to TB and he got some food and then we went and chilled at my house... Then he left at like 1:30am and then I went to bed...