TVD 3x11: All you have to do is get Stefan to stop decapitating my friends.
After a week of waiting eagerly for a new TVD episode, I somehow allowed myself to pass out on the long-awaited Thursday evening, figuring that I could postpone the gratification and watch the new episode on Friday night instead.
MISTAKE.
For one, I had to avoid the internet all day. It is embarrassing how much of my internet-related doings are TVD related (which I realized when I got on my computer and discovered I couldn't do ANYTHING I wanted to do without spoiling myself. Sad.). And guys, I have SO MUCH to catch up on. It is astounding. I need to read and comment on all your episode reviews, but first I have to write my own (because apparently that wasn't a one-time thing. Shocker.). So, here we go.
~LOL at Damon's happy shower time and Elena's emotional-turmoil workout. You guys.
"Just channeling frustration." I BET YOU ARE, ELENA.
And yet, despite my helpless Damon/Elena shipping, I SEE YOU, SHAMELESS BROTHERSHIP FLIRTING. Stefan, walking in on Damon post-shower. Their eye-sex is OBSCENE (read: glorious). If I knew how to make gifs I would absolutely make one of Damon doing the eye-thing at Stefan and Stefan seriously considering a morning quickie. It happened.
~Sometimes it seems like the sum total of witchcraft on this show is the ability to light candles. To be fair, those were a LOT of candles.
~I will never not adore Stefan and Damon acting like brothers. "Did you tell Elena?" "I said I wouldn't, so I didn't." "Just cause you said so..." "Come ON, bro." Oh, boys.
HEART-RIPPING BEFORE THE TITLE CARD? This is a good day.
Btw, I want to adopt Stefan's face. His little "Did you enjoy that, freak" eyebrow raise he did was THE GREATEST.
~I love the random moments of normalcy on this show. Elena and Bonnie decorating Caroline's locker just brought me back to when my friends did that for me in high school, and it's so domestic and simple and not important in the grand scheme of things, but OF COURSE they still do it, because, well, it's domestic and simple and not important in the grand scheme of things. The little details, man.
Side note: if Elena just got there too, how did she get so much done already? SO EFFICIENT.
~Love Damon's blatantly antagonistic relationship with the invisible dead witches. Taunt them more, Damon, because that always works out for you. Basically, I love it when Damon acts like a child. So, always.
~Ngl, I really liked how Bonnie noticed that Jeremy was saying what Elena pretty much hypnotized him to say. I loved Kat's delivery on "That's exactly what she said." And how she still didn't give it all away to Jeremy. I have a thing for these characters recognizing that what they're doing is wrong, dangerous, unfair, and yet letting it happen anyway.
~Caroline looks utterly gorgeous, of course, but I totally loved how she hadn't gone to the effort of curling her hair like she usually does. It's like she couldn't muster the energy to make herself perfect, because what was the point? My poor Caroline. Or am I just reading way too much into the usually questionable decisions of the hair and make-up department? We'll never know.
I'm glad Caroline mentioned Tyler's part in Jeremy's 'accident,' because that means at least someone is keeping her informed, even when she's not directly involved. I just don't like it when Caroline's left out of the team planning, ok?
So I had a brief moment of really loving Caroline/Tyler last season (but predictably when they got together I lost some interest. I'm hopeless, basically.), and I still like them well enough, but they're never going to be a ship I die for. That being said, this scene was lovely. I like that we had the heartfelt, meaningful confession from Tyler, and that it still doesn't change a thing. Also, their faces. So there's that.
~Rebekah gets her own room in Klaus's Dream House. My head!canon dictates that there is an adjoining door between her room and Klaus's. REBEKLAUS FOREVER.
I love how everyone's all "I want to live in Mystic Falls." "I was here first." As if this weren't the WORST TOWN EVER.
I probably should have taken the Stefan/Klaus scene a lot more seriously, but my little Klefan heart + my raging internal monologue made for some lolzy fun. Examples of my maturity:
Klaus: You know, I'm hurt. I hoped that I'd free you and we'd pick up where we left off.
Me: You mean with all the sex and everything?
And then:
Stefan: Friends don't strip friends of their free will.
Me: JUST THEIR CLOTHES.
This is why I watch TVD when everyone else in my house is asleep.
~I will never buy Stefan not caring about whether Damon lives or dies. I know this episode was all about Stefan being willing to follow through on his threats, but nothing will ever convince me that Stefan could let Damon die. Nice poker face, Stefan, but no. Also, with all his threats, he puts Elena in danger, not Damon. Because even Klaus knows that nothing is more important to Stefan than Damon. Not even revenge.
DECAPITATING STEFAN IS THE HOTTEST STEFAN. I'm not even going to pretend to feel guilty about it.
~Elena, Bonnie, and Matt jumping out and surprising Caroline was adorable. It just was.
Anyway, this whole scene was good and excellent and everything, but my flist has already done all of this vampire Caroline emotional trauma, so, come on, show, catch up. Basically, no need to analyze. All good.
~I love Klaus sfm. When Tyler wants Klaus to leave him out of everything, and Klaus just point blank goes "What would be the point in that?" I love him.
I was slightly hoping that Klaus's plan to fatally wound Caroline to get back at Stefan had something to do with those apparently forgotten Stefan/Caroline undertones from last season? Alas. I haven't forgotten about them, even if the show has.
~The Damon/Alaric scene was just so many wins all in a row. Directly referencing the ambiguity of the switch? Check. Them secretly being each other's dates? Also check. LOLZ? CHECK. One of my personal favorites inspiring me to create, well, this:
I KNOW HOW YOU WORK, DAMON.
Also, "Can't a council meeting ever just be a council meeting?" A+++++++++ x 100000000000. I freaking love it when this show makes fun of itself. But seriously, this must be the richest town council in the country. Probably cashing in on all the life insurance plans of its citizens.
~Ok, the funeral stuff was GOLD. Both Elena's and Caroline's. Within the space of a year, these people have all had their lives turned completely upside down, and both Elena and Caroline have literally died. And they always talk about moving on, getting over things, dealing with it. But I sort of love how this is them recognizing that some things, you can't get over. That they've all been trying to make these events make sense within the context of their lives, but now they see that that can't happen. This crazy vampire-werewolf-hybrid-magic-casualty-ridden disaster zone they now inhabit is NEVER going to make sense to a bunch of kids from a small town in North Carolina. They can't be those people anymore. So they bury those people, and send them off, fondly, but certainly. Because they did die, and the only thing left is to let them go.
And I adore how Caroline sees what this is, and smiles, and takes off her crown. And suddenly this is a different kind of birthday (but it's still a birthday. This show. <3)
WHAT DID I TELL YOU. Witchcraft = candle lighting.
~Another late-night exchange with my television:
Meredith Fell: I'm glad to see you're still alive.
Me: It is equally surprising that you're still alive, Dr. Fell/Alaric's love interest.
I know I'm not the only one who's speculated on the Salvatore financial status, but I found it weirdly jarring to hear it directly referenced that Damon is rich. I don't even know. It was just odd. But certainly no worse than last year's edition of Vampire Property Lawyer (thank you, Thomas Galvin).
I am 100% sure that the majority of Damon's frustration with Klaus was that Carol was almost as responsive to his flirting as she is to Damon's. Boy's got pride, you know?
"Nice vest." I DON'T NEED ANY HELP SHIPPING YOU TWO, DAMON, SERIOUSLY.
~That Bonnie/Elena compulsion conversation was A+++++++. I AM VINDICATED. I knew this show was smart enough to not gloss over it all. And Bonnie really goes for it - she flat out tells Elena she's not ok with what Elena did, and that Jeremy should have the right to make his own choices. It would have been out of character for Bonnie not to comment, but again, any other show...but THIS show, man. Her "Are you gonna compel me not to?" GO GIRL GO. That was awesome. And I like how Elena never actually tries to say it isn't wrong. She's doing it to protect him, yes, but she never really justifies herself. She knows. Well done, show. As usual.
~Still waiting to be interested in Meredith Fell. Also still waiting to not think "Oh hai Paul Wesley's wife" every time she appears.
~Stefan casually lifting the fucking huge knife. STOP BEING SO HOT, STEFAN.
~Stefan and Damon, fighting, as they do. My heart, it beats for them.
"Don't give me that no humanity crap. You can't just flip your switch. Your switch is fried, Stefan, just like your brain."
I DO NOT HAVE ENOUGH WORDS TO EXPRESS MY LOVE. YESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESx10000000.
~I...don't really care about this second Tyler/Caroline scene? Ok, the "I love you" was mildly awwww-inspiring, but other than that, I knew where the scene was heading, and I just couldn't be bothered to get that invested. Sorry, Forwood.
Also, seriously, this team needs to work on its communication skills. Because how could they NOT know that all Tyler had to do was feed her his blood? Not a big deal.
~Damon telling on Stefan to Klaus...guys, this Klaus/Damon shipping thing is starting to become a serious problem. I WANT IT.
"I know my brother better than anyone." <333333333333333333333333333 Because that's what I pick up from this scene. HELPLESS TO THE BROTHERSHIP.
~Stefan feeding Elena his blood was excellent. I knew it was coming, so it wasn't shocking, but what it WAS was interesting. Because obviously it's a comparison to when Damon did it in 2x20, but this time it isn't about forcing a choice on Elena. It isn't even about Elena at all. She's collateral damage, and it's so cold and impersonal, and it feels like she could be anyone, not Elena, his one and only. BUT there's still this little voice saying "Isn't this exactly what you want, Stefan? Because wouldn't it solve all your problems if Elena became a vampire?" He put her before himself in 2x20 - he obviously wants to live out eternity with her, but he lets her choose not to be a vampire. But this version with Stefan isn't worried about being selfish. He already hates himself enough. There's no point in doing the right thing here. He feeds Elena his blood as part of his plan, but hell if there isn't the tiniest part of him that believes that this is the way to have his forever with Elena.
I haven't read all your recaps, dear flisties, but I know you're all flailing over the Stefan/Elena scene, and rightly so. It's pretty much one of the best S/E scenes ever. I love how Elena is just furious with him - I've never been able to stand how Elena is always making excuses for Stefan or trying to ignore all their issues, but here she just CUTS into him, and it's exactly what he wants, and it is uniformly glorious.
Elena's "You're the one who saved me" is EVERYTHING. Their whole relationship was based on this idea that they saved each other - she helps him hold on to his humanity and he helped her escape her grief-fueled existence - but that relationship is dead. I honestly don't see how they can ever come back from all this. No amount of Stefan + switch + secretly trying to save everybody is going to make up for THIS. And here's Elena, breaking down, because who will save her now? She relied on Stefan to make her human again after the terrible things that have happened to her, but now he's doing those terrible things, and all she can see is what he did for her before and what he's doing now. I don't think Stefan and Elena are over (come on, NO ONE thinks that). But whatever they become will be nothing like what they were. It can't be. I see Stefan and Elena becoming more and more like Damon and Elena - they will love each other despite who they are, not because of it.
This exchange:
Stefan: Destroying Klaus is all I have left.
Elena: You had me! (TEARS, btw. Srsly, Nina Dobrev.)
Stefan: I lost you the minute I left town with him. You just haven't let yourself admit that yet.
is also EVERYTHING. It is the absolute crux of Stefan's motivation. Because, god, it isn't true. At all. Elena didn't give up on Stefan when he left. She didn't give up when he TOLD her to give up, she didn't give up when he "flipped the switch," she didn't give up when he taunted and tormented her, she didn't even really give up when he ruined their plan to kill Klaus. She STILL hasn't really given up. But he has. He gave up the second he drained that girl in Coffin Shack (sister store of Radio Shack, with its headquarters in Mystic Falls as its #1 customer). Because Stefan is an all-or-nothing sort of guy. He's either the totally good, totally human male romantic lead, or he's the off-the-rails uncaring monster, because he doesn't understand how he can be both. More than anything, he doesn't understand how anyone could love any version of himself other than the Stefan-approved Hero version. And he couldn't bear seeing Elena slip away, watching her dawning realization that there is no difference between vampire Stefan and human Stefan. So he takes away any opportunity she has to make her own choice (guys, THIS THEME, IT IS EVERYWHERE). It may be her right to choose whether she can love him even when he's part monster, but he needs to protect her, and he needs to protect himself, so he won't let her choose. He chooses for her. And every time she tries to fight him, he works harder to convince her that his choice for her is the right one. He could have just threatened to snap her neck. But he chose the cruelest way of killing her - driving her off Wickery Bridge, because he KNOWS it will destroy her to have him use this place against her like that. And he NEEDS her to understand that she can't love him. Because once she accepts that, maybe he can too.
And his "I don't really care what you think about me anymore, Elena." On the one hand, come on, Stefan, no. But then again, it's also entirely true. Because it doesn't matter what Elena thinks of all this. Stefan has made his mind up. The only person who thinks Stefan can't come back from this is Stefan. But he's the only person whose opinion really matters.
I loved this scene from start to finish. But guys, it's confession time. I know everyone is flailing about the glorious dysfunction of Stefan/Elena right now, and I dig it more than I've ever dug them before. But...I am still not feeling the shipper love? I know I gravitate toward messed up ships like magnesium to a magnet (supergeek!), but I still can't feel the adoration for S/E that I've felt for D/E in their darkest moments. Don't get me wrong - I am more interested in this pairing than I ever have been. But I can't find the flail. I don't feel this throbbing need for them to be more and more tortured and doomed and in love. I just want them to continue to deconstruct their whole previous relationship. And I feel SO DEFICIENT! I feel like I'm failing as an intellectual and as a perpetual shipper of the doomed ships. I want to love them! But I am in zero danger of jumping aboard the S/E ship. My heart is stubbornly steely to their charms. It is frustrating and upsetting and I am legitimately disappointed in myself. WHAT DO I DO???
~OH MY GOD THE KLAUS/CAROLINE SCENE. I don't even know what to do with all my love. Because I'm pretty sure that Klaus is fast becoming my favorite (after Damon - you all know I'm helpless), and pairing him with CAROLINE FUCKING FORBES is the best thing that could have happened to the universe. I say this without exaggeration. BEST. THING. EVER.
"On your birthday?" ALL THE AWARDS FOR KLAUS AND HIS WONDERFUL WONDERFUL FACE. Can't even.
"Aren't you, like, a billion or something?" BRB DRAWING HEARTS AROUND THESE TWO AND THEIR FACES. I AM IN LOVE.
And GUYS. Matt tells Elena that he thinks they're trapped in this crazy life, and here's Klaus, telling Caroline "You're free." And he's the ONLY one who's ever tried to make this thing that happened to Caroline a good thing.
This scene is so beyond beautiful. Klaus is calculating and clever and persuasive and ruthless, but here, he is kind. There are reasons for why he does what he does to Caroline. But he doesn't have to say anything. He can force her to drink his blood, or he can just convince her to do it for her family and friends or whatever. But instead he connects to her. He doesn't just tell her to live. He tells her why she should live. And it's POETRY.
"There's a whole world out there waiting for you. Great cities, and art, and music. Genuine beauty. And you can have all of it. You can have a thousand more birthdays. All you have to do is ask."
Anyone who doesn't think TVD deserves any award there is should just watch this scene, and Joseph Morgan's perfect delivery. This is beauty on the grandest scale. This is celebrating all the things this world has to offer. This is recognizing that beyond all the darkness and death and misery that we all endure every day, there is such beauty to be found to make it all worthwhile. This is Klaus, of all people, reminding Caroline that this isn't the end of her life. This is the beginning. There is so much to do and see and be, and it has nothing to do with her being a vampire and nothing to do with her being 17 forever. It is all there, regardless, waiting for her. The only choice is whether she is there to see it.
And once more, with feeling, we're back to choice. Because Klaus, this megalomaniacal psychopathic super villain, is giving her one. He does what Katherine didn't, what no one ever really did - he gives her the choice to live like this. And he does one more thing that no one else bothered to do for her - he tells her, for the first time, that being a vampire can be a good thing. It isn't just something you're stuck with - it's an opportunity. It comes with pain and suffering and turmoil, but it is also an opportunity to experience more of the good that life has to offer. And with that, Klaus does for her the one thing that Caroline needs. He makes it all ok.
And as if that weren't enough to reduce me to a sobbing mess of FEELINGS, Caroline finally gets to choose. She asks. And we have: "I don't want to die." TEARS. Because Caroline was feeling sorry for herself, wallowing in how she was technically dead forever. But in this world, that doesn't mean a thing. She may not be technically living, but she's ALIVE, and Klaus makes her realize she wants to be. It might not be the sort of life she thought she'd have, but it is a life. And it can be beautiful.
WHAT IS THIS SHOW EVEN.
And for one last shallow note: do I even need to say I ship it? I didn't think so.
~Ok, for my Damon/Elena scene. I do appreciate that this show knows how to organize itself. Last week's episode was D/E heavy, so this week it was light. But they don't ignore major plot points like other shows do. These two had to deal with what happened last week. And they did, and it worked, and that was that. No hitting us over the head with the dramatic cricket bat. Just Damon and Elena, being themselves.
Elena saying "I'll survive. Somehow I always do." <33333 Because she was just on Wickery Bridge, and she remembers more than ever that she survives, when no one else does, when she shouldn't, when she doesn't even want to (and OMG the parallels to Caroline choosing life and Elena not being allowed to choose death, just, WHAT SHOW HOW).
SO MUCH LOVE for Damon being the proud older brother to Stefan's psychopath. And so so so much love for Damon defending Stefan to Elena. He's not throwing his brother under the bus to get the girl (and it would have been super easy to in this moment). He's on his brother's team. Team Salvatore, to the end. <3333333
Ok, let's get to my OTP. Because this scene isn't flashy or grand or anything, it's just quiet and wonderful. Elena looking at him LIKE THAT, and yet still saying "You can't kiss me again," and Damon just going "I know." Because he does. That's what the kiss last week was about. That was his last stand. That was him doing what he wanted to do despite all signs saying he shouldn't. But he's not that guy. He isn't going to force her to be with him. He kissed her once, because he wanted to, and that's it. He's not going to do it again. He knows where they stand. It's all up to her at this point.
And as for Elena, well. This scene gave me plenty for my little D/E heart to overanalyze. Because she doesn't say "You shouldn't have kissed me" or "I don't want you to kiss me again." If her expression is any indication, she absolutely does want him to kiss her again. But they can't go there, not yet. Not that they don't want to. They're on pause. They know where Damon stands, they know more and more where she stands, but it's all just - not yet. Also, all I could hear when she said "You can't kiss me again" is "Next time, I have to kiss you." I know some people thought Elena should have been the one to kiss Damon last week, but again, that wasn't what that kiss was. I think that whenever that big ship-affirming kiss happens, it WILL be Elena who kisses him, because them becoming something more was always going to be her decision. And this scene just confirms that they both know that. Damon can't kiss her again, because it isn't his place to. It's hers. (And did anyone flash to Dawson's Creek and Joey and Pacey? Same team, man. It was always going to happen eventually. We have ship-cross.)
Lolzy side-note: Did anyone else have trouble understanding what Elena said in the "You can't kiss me again" line? I had to rewind it so many times. I figured it out eventually, but it was really messing with my token D/E scene. I was all "I KNOW I LOVE THIS SCENE. I'm just not entirely sure what's going on." Whatever. I got it eventually.
And now for my favorite line ever. "No, it's right. It's just not right now." MY SHIP, YOU ARE EVERYTHING. I love this so much more than I can say. Because again, it's just so quiet. And it's not definitive. It isn't "We are soulmates fated to be together forever and ever." It's just a validation that they are something, they are right, they work - but again, not yet. It's basically the D/E tagline: Not yet. Someday, who knows what day. But not yet.
And Elena and her little look after him - MY SHIPPER HEART. She knows. He'll wait. And so will she.
~Oh, Jeremy. I'm going to miss you. Really. But I applaud this show for being brave and putting its money where its mouth is. They say they're sending Jeremy away, and they send him away. No idle threats on this show. It's a bold move, and it's a good one, if only because it gives me another opportunity to talk about how much I love when these people choose to be wrong. This episode addressed the moral complications of compelling Jeremy. Bonnie isn't ok with it, and she doesn't support it. But here at the end, she lets it happen anyway. Because these people have mastered the art of knowing something is wrong, but letting it happen anyway. Because right and wrong don't really matter anymore. Safe matters. And Bonnie lets him go, despite herself. It's fantastic.
~LOLx10000 at Klaus getting Caroline a better and more expensive bracelet. That was straight up hilarious. THESE TWO NEED TO HAPPEN STAT.
~The last scene was gorgeous. Wow, Matt and Elena work again! That was nice. Also, shameless shipper moment: "The girl who didn't fall in love with vampires." Vampires. Plural. I SEE WHAT YOU DID THERE, ELENA. NOT SUBTLE. I APPROVE.
But wow, Matt, declaring "You're not that girl anymore. It's ok to let her go." For the guy who tried to keep himself away from this life, this is honest and a little brutal and a lot wonderful. And it's exactly what she needs. Matt's right - he knew that girl, and he loved that girl. But he loves this one too. And if the little smile on her face is any indication, Elena can work with that.
~Oh yeah, Meredith. Still don't really care. Sorry.
~And SO MANY LOLZ for Damon and Liz at the end. This is just a normal brutal murder. And they both sort of look like, "Huh, we still have just murders here? Hmm." THIS TOWN.
Damn it all. I thought for sure this one was going to be so much shorter, because I wasn't nearly so flaily about this episode. So what the hell is this? I'M SORRY. I will get better. Eventually. Just not right now (ALREADY QUOTING FOREVER).