Meme Me Up, Scotty!
So real life has seriously gotten in the way of my LJ posting lately. RUDE. I ran my very first 10k yesterday, and it sort of knocked me out for a while. I literally fell asleep at 9 PM last night. So I've been a bit absent, and VERY late on a few things, but I have spent the day catching up on the interwebs, and hey look, memes!
First off, this Holiday Love Meme! Adorable. And I have meme jealously, so when my flisters do a meme, I must do it too. Thus, behold:
My Thread!
Also, remember that 5 Things Meme from a few weeks back? Probably not. But I've finally filled mine out! My rather extensive thoughts on five associations upupa_epops and ever_neutral have about me. Here are the actual rules:
Comment to this post, and I will list five things I associate with you. They might make sense or they might be totally random. Then post that list, with your commentary, to your LJ (or just add a reply back to me). Other people (including me) can get lists from you, and the meme merrily perpetuates itself.
So if anyone still cares about this meme, hit me up. Meanwhile, here are my novels answers!
From upupa_epops
1. Virginia Woolf
As much as I love being associated with Virginia Woolf, I’m a bit of a sham, because to be quite honest, I’ve only read one of her books. I read Mrs. Dalloway in the Modernist Novel class I took in my senior year of high school. I haven’t read it since, though I’ve been meaning to, so I don’t remember everything perfectly. What I do remember is how much it got in my head. Before we read the book, we heard all sorts of things - teachers warning us how hard it could be to follow, students talking about how boring it was, all the sorts of warnings you get when you’re about to read a really famous book. So I went into it with certain preconceptions in my head. I didn’t expect to like it at all. I was totally and completely wrong. Every night I would do my assigned reading, mostly just to get through it. I’m a slow reader (curse of my life - NOT conducive to being an English major), so the mere fact that I was able to read however many pages were assigned each night was a triumph in and of itself, and I would move on to other homework. But the next day, I would find myself thinking about it. Not just thinking about it, but OBSESSING about it. I was utterly unable to stop going over and over what had happened - and not even just what had happened, but how it had happened. The writing itself wormed its way into my brain, and without realizing how it had all happened I would find myself in class bursting with things I wanted to talk about. Most of my fellow classmates were not as enamored with this book as I was, and I just couldn’t understand how it wasn’t getting to them like it was getting to me. This happened to me every night for the two weeks we spent reading it - I would do my reading, think nothing of it, and wake up the next day with a head full of Mrs. Dalloway. I still think of it as one of my favorite books, because it is on a very short list of books I could not stop thinking about until I finished it. And the ending, in all its bittersweet glory, still gives me chills.
Not to mention that Woolf’s ‘stream of consciousness’ style affected me like no other. Not that it affected my writing (I wish), but rather that it affected my e-mails and texts and posts and all manner of social interaction. I write whatever comes to mind, and instead of editing or deleting I just reference whatever I wrote above, correct it, and keep going. It’s weird. My personal writing is pretty much a direct transcript of my thoughts, and that makes for some pretty lengthy messages. Like this one.
2. Languages
This is a reference to the rather epic private message exchange that Marta and I have been involved in for a few weeks. I basically grill her on all the mechanics of Polish and she lets me rant about my past adventures in learning French. When I think about it, language has always been fairly important in my life. I started learning French when I was about 7 - not seriously, but enough to make it a significant enough part of my childhood. My family travels to France a lot, and the language has always been around me in one way or another. My sister majored in French, I took years of French in high school, and my mother will randomly speak it whenever she feels the urge. It’s just something we do. Once I got a pretty good grasp of French, I started learning Italian. I got too busy to get very far, but I’m half Italian, so I like knowing what little I’m familiar with. I need to master Italian, but after that I’d like to keep learning languages - I’ve always thought it would be awesome to know Russian (Cyrillic is the best). Learning languages has always been something I just wanted to do.
3. Traveling
Traveling is another thing that’s been ingrained into me since childhood. I’ll start by stating outright that I’m ridiculously spoiled in this area. My parents have always been big travelers, so instead of sending us to summer camp they would take me and my sister to Europe. I’ve been going to Europe every summer since I was 7. I know I’m absurdly privileged in that respect, and I’m constantly grateful for it. I haven’t actually been to that many places - we tend to go to the same countries over and over again and just explore different areas. But all the traveling has given me a rather odd sense of identity. I’m American, and I’m perfectly happy with that. But I feel sort of British a lot of the time. I was raised on British humor (Monty Python, Blackadder, all the good stuff), and I’ve spent so much time in London that I’m super comfortable there. So as much as I don’t doubt that I’m NOT British (I don’t have a drop of British blood in my body), I can’t shake the feeling. I’m a self-proclaimed nationality mutt.
4. Damon Salvatore, everywhere, every time, all the time.
Damon Salvatore. What is there even to say about you? I’m not one of those crazy fangirls who thinks Damon is the greatest romantic hero since Romeo (incidentally, also not a perfect romantic hero). I have my problems with Damon, I recognize his flaws, I disapprove of many of his actions - but despite everything, I love that boy. LOVE him. And not just because he looks like that (but god, he looks like THAT). But because he’s hilarious and irreverent and morally reprehensible and unapologetic and just so awful sometimes, and it’s FANTASTIC. I love everyone in Mystic Falls, I really do. I love my badass girls and my crazy wounded vampires and my ridiculously chiseled werewolves and my strong but stubborn witches. Intellectually, I adore talking about so many of them equally. Caroline and Stefan and Katherine and Elena and all the others are so fascinating to deconstruct and analyze and flail about. But I am never happier than when Damon Salvatore is on my screen. He’s just fun to watch. Perhaps it makes me common, but I love that boy, and there’s nothing I can do about it. Here’s my heart, Mr. Salvatore. You don’t even need to rip it out (more on that later).
5. Mumford & Sons
THE SOUNDTRACK OF MY SOUL. I cannot even express how much I love Mumford & Sons. I was one of those typical people who only knew the singles for ages. I was completely in love with The Cave and Little Lion Man, but I didn’t know any of their other songs. Then this summer I decided to check out something new, and I listened to Awake My Soul. From the first line, I was pretty much in awe. Anyone who starts a song with “How fickle my heart” has my instant adoration. I listened to Awake My Soul about eight more times, and then I listened to the rest of the album. And then I kept listening to it, every single day, for about 3 months. Seriously. I love the banjo, I love the music, I love how so many of the songs are two songs in one. But more than anything, I adore the lyrics. They are literally poetry. So many lines just struck me to the core - I felt what they were writing. I found shades of my soul in so many of their songs, and I just could not stop listening. Sigh No More is an incredible album - if you haven’t heard it, go listen to it immediately. And really listen. I will never not love Mumford & Sons.
From ever_neutral
1. TVD FLAIL FOREVER
This show, man. I don’t even know what it has done to me. I LOVE THIS SHOW SO FUCKING MUCH. Like, beyond reason. My family thinks I’m ridiculous for being so in love with a show called The Vampire Diaries. Admittedly, the title is ridiculous. Even the acronym is ridiculous (my friend persuaded me to call it VD instead of TVD, and that’s a tricky habit to break). But I constantly tell my doubting friends and family, I will defend this show to the death. Because despite everything - clichéd premise, unrealistically attractive people, the network, the source material, everything - this show is so, so good. The most accurate description I’ve ever seen of TVD is that it is “improbably excellent.” And it really is. Because how does a show ostensibly about a love triangle that involves freaking vampires become a fast-paced, emotionally nuanced, beautifully acted, impeccably scripted, and consistently fascinating narrative? I don’t even understand how this show is as good as it is. And it’s caused the fangirl in me to reawaken with a vengeance. My inner fangirl was never suppressed very deep or for very long, but this show has made me reenter fandom in a way I haven’t needed to for almost 10 years. I’ve loved many shows in the past decade, but I’ve never needed so desperately to talk about them like this. I didn’t intend to rejoin fandom when I started watching TVD. I had no plans to reactivate the livejournal account I apparently made 8 years ago. But I quite literally couldn’t help myself. This show just gives me SO MANY FEELINGS, and I craved an outlet. And then I found all you people, and my life got so much better. PEOPLE WHO UNDERSTAND ME. This show has gotten in my system. I enjoy a lot of TV, but nothing makes me happier than TVD right now. I find myself comparing all other shows to TVD and wishing they had the same pacing, aversion to stereotype, and overall serial excellence of our show. I could flail about TVD for pages and pages and pages, and I still couldn’t adequately express how happy I am that this show exists, and that I get to flail about it with you all. TVD FLAILING FOREVER (WHICH HAS ALSO REVIVED MY LOVE FOR CAPSLOCK. I REGRET NOTHING).
2. Fucked up fictional people being gloriously fucked up NO APOLOGIES.
It is a truth universally acknowledged that the more fucked up a character is, the more I go for said character. I have always rooted for the villains. I always, always fall for the alternative choice in any love triangle, the screw-up, the bad boy, the emotionally damaged and less suitable choice. Call me Tyrion Lannister, but I have an affinity for broken things. And for whatever reason, I want them to stay broken. For my example, I’m going to be not at all surprising and use Damon Salvatore. Because Damon Salvatore is so, so fucked up. There’s no point in pretending he’s not. And I dig it so hard. Because he KNOWS he’s fucked up, and he just doesn’t care. And neither does the show. That’s not to say the show itself condones his behavior (ever_neutral just wrote a fantastic post about this), but Damon Salvatore will not be redeemed, and that’s just fine. He can have character growth and learn to be more socially responsible and the like, but he’s not going to stop being a vampire. He’s not suddenly going to no longer enjoy killing people. And he doesn’t want to stop - this is who he is, and that’s just the way it is. I mention at pretty much every chance I get that this is my absolute favorite thing about “Disturbing Behavior” - that it basically acknowledged that Damon is the way he is, and he’s fine with it, even if Elena isn’t. Even if he’s wrong.
As people of the real world, we all agree that killing people is wrong. Compulsion is a total consent disaster. Heart-ripping is not to be encouraged (MORE ON THAT LATER). But when I’m not in the real world? The more terrible someone is, the happier I am. It’s FUN to watch characters do awful things. It’s amusing and exciting and so ridiculous that I just love it. Damon in the real world? A psychopath who should be locked away forever and ever. Damon on TV? A FUCKING GOOD TIME. This is one of my favorite things about TVD - it’s not your typical tale of people who need to be saved. Stefan wants to be saved, Damon probably should be saved, but that’s not what this is about. Even as much as I loved Buffy, that is the path they chose with Spike - in order to make him a good guy, they had to make him stop killing people. TVD doesn’t do that. As much as they’re not good, Damon and Stefan are absolutely the good guys on the show. We root for them, and we’re supposed to. But they kill people, and that’s not going to stop. They’re fucked up, complex, literal monsters, but that doesn’t mean we can’t love them anyway. And that is brave storytelling. Never change, TVD. And NEVER CHANGE, MY HORRIBLE, WONDERFUL MONSTERS.
3. Doomed ships!
Fucking doomed ships. I gravitate towards them like I gravitate towards the damaged boys. I have watched many a show with a love triangle, and I ALWAYS choose the wrong ship. As in I choose the ship that causes me years and years of heartbreak and gives me so many issues that I carry them with me through all my subsequent fandoms (I am the Grudgemaster). I have yet to post any lengthy commentary on my past shipping ordeals because they would literally be novels, but I have enough shipping trauma to last me a lifetime. But I CAN’T STOP LOVING THESE DOOMED SHIPS. Sometimes a ship only becomes interesting to me once it reaches doomed status. Spoiler alert for Downton Abbey! For example, I liked Matthew and Mary well enough in series 1, but from the very first episode in series 2, I was suddenly IN LOVE with them, because they officially seemed doomed. Not that I doubt that this ship is ultimately endgame, but they won’t get to be together before much misery and angst. And thus I officially adore them. WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME? It’s like Stockholm Syndrome. I am held captive by the perpetual unhappiness of these ships, and then I crave them like oxygen. I have lists of ships that have burned me. I have many, many reasons why they have killed my soul. But I won’t go into that here, because that is far too much of an undertaking. Beware, flisters. I have actual years of pent up shipping aggression. PANDORA’S BOX OF SHIPPING ANGST.
4. Icon noob.
I blame youcallitwinter entirely for my brief phase as an icon maker. I saw all her pretty icon posts and I got jealous that all I had was the default human-shaped icon. But me being the overly proud and overly ambitious internet fiend that I am, I became determined to make my own icons. So I downloaded Gimp, researched like crazy, and spent 5 days making icons. I devoted every spare moment I had to this. But somehow, even with all that time, I only managed to make 5 icons, because I insisted on making my own screencaps, and, frankly, I was sort of terrible at icon making in general. I am fiercely proud of (most of) my icons. I’d like to make more. But I ran out of ideas - at least ideas that I had the skill set for. I could NOT figure out layers, which is pretty much Icon Making 101, and despite the fact that I watched videos and read blogs, I just couldn’t make things work. So I am on an icon making hiatus until I become better at the internet. But my Caroline and Stefan icons make me happy, and I don’t look like nearly so much of a creeper when I post on stranger’s walls, so that was a lost week well spent.
5. HEART-RIPPING!
HEART-RIPPING IS THE BEST. THE ABSOLUTE BEST. TVD has done very, very weird things to me. It has rerouted my moral compass. And it has given me very strange turn-ons. Mainly, heart-ripping and neck snapping. I don’t even know how, but those two deeply disturbing actions have become a source of unadulterated joy for me. NORMAL, WHAT IS IT? I don’t even care. I literally clap and cheer when Damon rips someone’s heart out. I beam with pride when he neck-snaps. This is not just Damon-stanning. I seal-clap when anyone does it - Damon just does it A LOT. And I love him so much for it. Because it is invariably hilarious. I liked Mason as much as any right-thinking female would, but MAN do I love his death scene. It’s just awesome. And no one can say Elijah didn’t look badass when he ripped out all those hearts (or Damon with the mid-air heart-snatch during the werewolf showdown - THAT WAS THE BEST). Seriously, guys, how great is heart-ripping?
And honorable mention to neck-snapping. The quicker one is to neck snap, the more I like…one (freaking pronouns). Who wasn’t gleeful when Greta Martin finally got her neck snapped? That was a long time coming. And as horrible as it was, it was phenomenal television when Jeremy got his neck snapped. Shocking and awful and FANTASTIC. Snap all the necks, my crazy vampires. Rip out all the hearts. Delight me, my glorious psychopaths. I AM MORALLY DEPRAVED AND YET I REGRET NOTHING.
Ok, that's actually all (for now).
First off, this Holiday Love Meme! Adorable. And I have meme jealously, so when my flisters do a meme, I must do it too. Thus, behold:
My Thread!
Also, remember that 5 Things Meme from a few weeks back? Probably not. But I've finally filled mine out! My rather extensive thoughts on five associations upupa_epops and ever_neutral have about me. Here are the actual rules:
Comment to this post, and I will list five things I associate with you. They might make sense or they might be totally random. Then post that list, with your commentary, to your LJ (or just add a reply back to me). Other people (including me) can get lists from you, and the meme merrily perpetuates itself.
So if anyone still cares about this meme, hit me up. Meanwhile, here are my novels answers!
From upupa_epops
1. Virginia Woolf
As much as I love being associated with Virginia Woolf, I’m a bit of a sham, because to be quite honest, I’ve only read one of her books. I read Mrs. Dalloway in the Modernist Novel class I took in my senior year of high school. I haven’t read it since, though I’ve been meaning to, so I don’t remember everything perfectly. What I do remember is how much it got in my head. Before we read the book, we heard all sorts of things - teachers warning us how hard it could be to follow, students talking about how boring it was, all the sorts of warnings you get when you’re about to read a really famous book. So I went into it with certain preconceptions in my head. I didn’t expect to like it at all. I was totally and completely wrong. Every night I would do my assigned reading, mostly just to get through it. I’m a slow reader (curse of my life - NOT conducive to being an English major), so the mere fact that I was able to read however many pages were assigned each night was a triumph in and of itself, and I would move on to other homework. But the next day, I would find myself thinking about it. Not just thinking about it, but OBSESSING about it. I was utterly unable to stop going over and over what had happened - and not even just what had happened, but how it had happened. The writing itself wormed its way into my brain, and without realizing how it had all happened I would find myself in class bursting with things I wanted to talk about. Most of my fellow classmates were not as enamored with this book as I was, and I just couldn’t understand how it wasn’t getting to them like it was getting to me. This happened to me every night for the two weeks we spent reading it - I would do my reading, think nothing of it, and wake up the next day with a head full of Mrs. Dalloway. I still think of it as one of my favorite books, because it is on a very short list of books I could not stop thinking about until I finished it. And the ending, in all its bittersweet glory, still gives me chills.
Not to mention that Woolf’s ‘stream of consciousness’ style affected me like no other. Not that it affected my writing (I wish), but rather that it affected my e-mails and texts and posts and all manner of social interaction. I write whatever comes to mind, and instead of editing or deleting I just reference whatever I wrote above, correct it, and keep going. It’s weird. My personal writing is pretty much a direct transcript of my thoughts, and that makes for some pretty lengthy messages. Like this one.
2. Languages
This is a reference to the rather epic private message exchange that Marta and I have been involved in for a few weeks. I basically grill her on all the mechanics of Polish and she lets me rant about my past adventures in learning French. When I think about it, language has always been fairly important in my life. I started learning French when I was about 7 - not seriously, but enough to make it a significant enough part of my childhood. My family travels to France a lot, and the language has always been around me in one way or another. My sister majored in French, I took years of French in high school, and my mother will randomly speak it whenever she feels the urge. It’s just something we do. Once I got a pretty good grasp of French, I started learning Italian. I got too busy to get very far, but I’m half Italian, so I like knowing what little I’m familiar with. I need to master Italian, but after that I’d like to keep learning languages - I’ve always thought it would be awesome to know Russian (Cyrillic is the best). Learning languages has always been something I just wanted to do.
3. Traveling
Traveling is another thing that’s been ingrained into me since childhood. I’ll start by stating outright that I’m ridiculously spoiled in this area. My parents have always been big travelers, so instead of sending us to summer camp they would take me and my sister to Europe. I’ve been going to Europe every summer since I was 7. I know I’m absurdly privileged in that respect, and I’m constantly grateful for it. I haven’t actually been to that many places - we tend to go to the same countries over and over again and just explore different areas. But all the traveling has given me a rather odd sense of identity. I’m American, and I’m perfectly happy with that. But I feel sort of British a lot of the time. I was raised on British humor (Monty Python, Blackadder, all the good stuff), and I’ve spent so much time in London that I’m super comfortable there. So as much as I don’t doubt that I’m NOT British (I don’t have a drop of British blood in my body), I can’t shake the feeling. I’m a self-proclaimed nationality mutt.
4. Damon Salvatore, everywhere, every time, all the time.
Damon Salvatore. What is there even to say about you? I’m not one of those crazy fangirls who thinks Damon is the greatest romantic hero since Romeo (incidentally, also not a perfect romantic hero). I have my problems with Damon, I recognize his flaws, I disapprove of many of his actions - but despite everything, I love that boy. LOVE him. And not just because he looks like that (but god, he looks like THAT). But because he’s hilarious and irreverent and morally reprehensible and unapologetic and just so awful sometimes, and it’s FANTASTIC. I love everyone in Mystic Falls, I really do. I love my badass girls and my crazy wounded vampires and my ridiculously chiseled werewolves and my strong but stubborn witches. Intellectually, I adore talking about so many of them equally. Caroline and Stefan and Katherine and Elena and all the others are so fascinating to deconstruct and analyze and flail about. But I am never happier than when Damon Salvatore is on my screen. He’s just fun to watch. Perhaps it makes me common, but I love that boy, and there’s nothing I can do about it. Here’s my heart, Mr. Salvatore. You don’t even need to rip it out (more on that later).
5. Mumford & Sons
THE SOUNDTRACK OF MY SOUL. I cannot even express how much I love Mumford & Sons. I was one of those typical people who only knew the singles for ages. I was completely in love with The Cave and Little Lion Man, but I didn’t know any of their other songs. Then this summer I decided to check out something new, and I listened to Awake My Soul. From the first line, I was pretty much in awe. Anyone who starts a song with “How fickle my heart” has my instant adoration. I listened to Awake My Soul about eight more times, and then I listened to the rest of the album. And then I kept listening to it, every single day, for about 3 months. Seriously. I love the banjo, I love the music, I love how so many of the songs are two songs in one. But more than anything, I adore the lyrics. They are literally poetry. So many lines just struck me to the core - I felt what they were writing. I found shades of my soul in so many of their songs, and I just could not stop listening. Sigh No More is an incredible album - if you haven’t heard it, go listen to it immediately. And really listen. I will never not love Mumford & Sons.
From ever_neutral
1. TVD FLAIL FOREVER
This show, man. I don’t even know what it has done to me. I LOVE THIS SHOW SO FUCKING MUCH. Like, beyond reason. My family thinks I’m ridiculous for being so in love with a show called The Vampire Diaries. Admittedly, the title is ridiculous. Even the acronym is ridiculous (my friend persuaded me to call it VD instead of TVD, and that’s a tricky habit to break). But I constantly tell my doubting friends and family, I will defend this show to the death. Because despite everything - clichéd premise, unrealistically attractive people, the network, the source material, everything - this show is so, so good. The most accurate description I’ve ever seen of TVD is that it is “improbably excellent.” And it really is. Because how does a show ostensibly about a love triangle that involves freaking vampires become a fast-paced, emotionally nuanced, beautifully acted, impeccably scripted, and consistently fascinating narrative? I don’t even understand how this show is as good as it is. And it’s caused the fangirl in me to reawaken with a vengeance. My inner fangirl was never suppressed very deep or for very long, but this show has made me reenter fandom in a way I haven’t needed to for almost 10 years. I’ve loved many shows in the past decade, but I’ve never needed so desperately to talk about them like this. I didn’t intend to rejoin fandom when I started watching TVD. I had no plans to reactivate the livejournal account I apparently made 8 years ago. But I quite literally couldn’t help myself. This show just gives me SO MANY FEELINGS, and I craved an outlet. And then I found all you people, and my life got so much better. PEOPLE WHO UNDERSTAND ME. This show has gotten in my system. I enjoy a lot of TV, but nothing makes me happier than TVD right now. I find myself comparing all other shows to TVD and wishing they had the same pacing, aversion to stereotype, and overall serial excellence of our show. I could flail about TVD for pages and pages and pages, and I still couldn’t adequately express how happy I am that this show exists, and that I get to flail about it with you all. TVD FLAILING FOREVER (WHICH HAS ALSO REVIVED MY LOVE FOR CAPSLOCK. I REGRET NOTHING).
2. Fucked up fictional people being gloriously fucked up NO APOLOGIES.
It is a truth universally acknowledged that the more fucked up a character is, the more I go for said character. I have always rooted for the villains. I always, always fall for the alternative choice in any love triangle, the screw-up, the bad boy, the emotionally damaged and less suitable choice. Call me Tyrion Lannister, but I have an affinity for broken things. And for whatever reason, I want them to stay broken. For my example, I’m going to be not at all surprising and use Damon Salvatore. Because Damon Salvatore is so, so fucked up. There’s no point in pretending he’s not. And I dig it so hard. Because he KNOWS he’s fucked up, and he just doesn’t care. And neither does the show. That’s not to say the show itself condones his behavior (ever_neutral just wrote a fantastic post about this), but Damon Salvatore will not be redeemed, and that’s just fine. He can have character growth and learn to be more socially responsible and the like, but he’s not going to stop being a vampire. He’s not suddenly going to no longer enjoy killing people. And he doesn’t want to stop - this is who he is, and that’s just the way it is. I mention at pretty much every chance I get that this is my absolute favorite thing about “Disturbing Behavior” - that it basically acknowledged that Damon is the way he is, and he’s fine with it, even if Elena isn’t. Even if he’s wrong.
As people of the real world, we all agree that killing people is wrong. Compulsion is a total consent disaster. Heart-ripping is not to be encouraged (MORE ON THAT LATER). But when I’m not in the real world? The more terrible someone is, the happier I am. It’s FUN to watch characters do awful things. It’s amusing and exciting and so ridiculous that I just love it. Damon in the real world? A psychopath who should be locked away forever and ever. Damon on TV? A FUCKING GOOD TIME. This is one of my favorite things about TVD - it’s not your typical tale of people who need to be saved. Stefan wants to be saved, Damon probably should be saved, but that’s not what this is about. Even as much as I loved Buffy, that is the path they chose with Spike - in order to make him a good guy, they had to make him stop killing people. TVD doesn’t do that. As much as they’re not good, Damon and Stefan are absolutely the good guys on the show. We root for them, and we’re supposed to. But they kill people, and that’s not going to stop. They’re fucked up, complex, literal monsters, but that doesn’t mean we can’t love them anyway. And that is brave storytelling. Never change, TVD. And NEVER CHANGE, MY HORRIBLE, WONDERFUL MONSTERS.
3. Doomed ships!
Fucking doomed ships. I gravitate towards them like I gravitate towards the damaged boys. I have watched many a show with a love triangle, and I ALWAYS choose the wrong ship. As in I choose the ship that causes me years and years of heartbreak and gives me so many issues that I carry them with me through all my subsequent fandoms (I am the Grudgemaster). I have yet to post any lengthy commentary on my past shipping ordeals because they would literally be novels, but I have enough shipping trauma to last me a lifetime. But I CAN’T STOP LOVING THESE DOOMED SHIPS. Sometimes a ship only becomes interesting to me once it reaches doomed status. Spoiler alert for Downton Abbey! For example, I liked Matthew and Mary well enough in series 1, but from the very first episode in series 2, I was suddenly IN LOVE with them, because they officially seemed doomed. Not that I doubt that this ship is ultimately endgame, but they won’t get to be together before much misery and angst. And thus I officially adore them. WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME? It’s like Stockholm Syndrome. I am held captive by the perpetual unhappiness of these ships, and then I crave them like oxygen. I have lists of ships that have burned me. I have many, many reasons why they have killed my soul. But I won’t go into that here, because that is far too much of an undertaking. Beware, flisters. I have actual years of pent up shipping aggression. PANDORA’S BOX OF SHIPPING ANGST.
4. Icon noob.
I blame youcallitwinter entirely for my brief phase as an icon maker. I saw all her pretty icon posts and I got jealous that all I had was the default human-shaped icon. But me being the overly proud and overly ambitious internet fiend that I am, I became determined to make my own icons. So I downloaded Gimp, researched like crazy, and spent 5 days making icons. I devoted every spare moment I had to this. But somehow, even with all that time, I only managed to make 5 icons, because I insisted on making my own screencaps, and, frankly, I was sort of terrible at icon making in general. I am fiercely proud of (most of) my icons. I’d like to make more. But I ran out of ideas - at least ideas that I had the skill set for. I could NOT figure out layers, which is pretty much Icon Making 101, and despite the fact that I watched videos and read blogs, I just couldn’t make things work. So I am on an icon making hiatus until I become better at the internet. But my Caroline and Stefan icons make me happy, and I don’t look like nearly so much of a creeper when I post on stranger’s walls, so that was a lost week well spent.
5. HEART-RIPPING!
HEART-RIPPING IS THE BEST. THE ABSOLUTE BEST. TVD has done very, very weird things to me. It has rerouted my moral compass. And it has given me very strange turn-ons. Mainly, heart-ripping and neck snapping. I don’t even know how, but those two deeply disturbing actions have become a source of unadulterated joy for me. NORMAL, WHAT IS IT? I don’t even care. I literally clap and cheer when Damon rips someone’s heart out. I beam with pride when he neck-snaps. This is not just Damon-stanning. I seal-clap when anyone does it - Damon just does it A LOT. And I love him so much for it. Because it is invariably hilarious. I liked Mason as much as any right-thinking female would, but MAN do I love his death scene. It’s just awesome. And no one can say Elijah didn’t look badass when he ripped out all those hearts (or Damon with the mid-air heart-snatch during the werewolf showdown - THAT WAS THE BEST). Seriously, guys, how great is heart-ripping?
And honorable mention to neck-snapping. The quicker one is to neck snap, the more I like…one (freaking pronouns). Who wasn’t gleeful when Greta Martin finally got her neck snapped? That was a long time coming. And as horrible as it was, it was phenomenal television when Jeremy got his neck snapped. Shocking and awful and FANTASTIC. Snap all the necks, my crazy vampires. Rip out all the hearts. Delight me, my glorious psychopaths. I AM MORALLY DEPRAVED AND YET I REGRET NOTHING.
Ok, that's actually all (for now).