You, Two
Title: You, Two
Author: stttmsbwa
Characters/Pairings: Josh Peck/Drake Parker, Drake Bell/Josh Nichols
Summary: There's been some sort of a mix-up here.
A/N: This is for you, Glyn. I'm sorry it took so long to write. WARNING to all: This is just really silly. So, please suspend reality for a little bit and enjoy some suuuuper cracky fun.
Josh exhaled softly and checked his watch. 3:23.
He had said to meet in front of the hotel at 3. And Josh could only assume that he had meant 3 PM. Because to meet in front of the hotel at 3 AM? Well, that would just be absurd. (On the other hand, something that Drake would totally do.)
Drake had to've meant the afternoon. A rock star's lifestyle isn't that crazy-go-nuts. (Although, knowing Drake, it would be). Besides, the whole point of this was to grab an early dinner.
A nice, early dinner for two.
Two lovers.
Gah.
Boyfriends.
Erm.
Brothers.
Eeesh.
Stepbrothers.
Yes. Stepbrothers who were close. Very close. Close in ways that made Josh blush when he'd think about it too much.
And Josh Nichols had a tendency to think too much.
Just like Drake Parker had a tendency to be late.
Rolling his eyes at the thought, Josh checked his watch again. 3:30. Drake was half an hour late.
Thinking about it, this wasn't that bad. The usual late timeframe is 15 minutes to half an hour.
Drake would show up at any second.
Any second now.
Yes. Any minute.
(Josh was going to kill Drake. He was going to lecture him, chastise him, and then kill him.)
Grumbling to himself, Josh swiveled his head around, eyes searching for a familiar head of red hair.
And then he saw him.
At first Josh thought, "Finally!" But after a double take, and then a third take, Josh couldn't help but shake his head.
Was that really Drake?
The redhead he was watching walked in Josh's direction casually, as if he were in no hurry but as if he were one with the small crowd. Big sun glasses and slight stubble covering his face. Sporting slim, gray slacks and a black pea coat.
There was no way this could be Drake. Drake Parker. Josh's Drake.
Drake would be rushing to get to Josh. He would be wearing something classy yet young. He wouldn't take the care to make sure he was unnoticed.
Not that Drake was an obnoxious press junkie. (Well, to be fair, he did enjoy the attention. Very much. Just not when he knew Josh was around.)
But this person? This person could not be Drake.
So why was he walking in Josh's direction? Casting short glances and almost contained smirks in Josh's direction?
And why was he reaching for Josh's arm?
"Hey, babe. You're here earlier than usual."
The next thing Josh knew, he was being pulled along the sidewalk along side this, this -
"Drake?!"
Drake hushed him and continued walking at a steady pace.
"Quiet. Don't want the paparazzo to spot us."
"But - "
"Almost there."
Taking a harp turn down an alleyway, Drake guided Josh through heavy doors into a dimly lit building and down stone steps. Once the door closed behind them with a slam, Drake whipped off his glasses and turned to face Josh.
"Why, hello there handsome."
And then he kissed Josh. Square on the lips.
Josh stood absolutely still for a second before melting into the contact. It was brief but soft and sweet, Drake's stubble tickling Josh's cheeks as he pulled back.
"Mmm, too long."
Josh couldn't respond. Drake smirked up at him, rubbing his hands up and down Josh's arms.
"What's up with you? You're acting strange. And what are you wearing, you look - "
A man walked into the entrance way, cutting Drake off.
"Mr. Bell? Your table is this way, you can follow me."
--
There was always an excuse (nothing was too sticky for Drake to work himself out of), and as Drake pushed through the crowd he tried to come up with a really good one. One that Josh would believe.
"I was thinking we meant 3 in the morning, and I didn't remember until last minute."
Drake tripped over a lady's foot as he maneuvered his was between a fat man and a young girl.
"No, that wouldn't work."
Panting a little, Drake caught sight of the hotel.
"Or would it?"
Drake began to work on his story (he was Drake Parker; he always had a story) as he approached the hotel. But there was something wrong with the situation.
Where was Josh?
Drake pulled his cell phone out of his pocket and checked the time. 4:02. Would Josh leave if Drake was this late? He never had before.
So why wasn't he where he said he'd be?
Before Drake could even open his phone and hit the speed dial that would answer all his questions, arms snaked around his waist and drew him close to another body.
Gasping in fear, Drake struggled against the grip and whipped his head around to see who was behind him.
A scruffy, grinning Josh greeted him.
"Well, hi."
Drake exhaled a sigh of relief. It was only -
What?
"Josh?!"
Shushing the bewildered Drake, Josh released his embrace and pulled on Drake's elbow.
"Not so loud, you dork. Come inside and we can talk."
Drake followed the seems-to-be-Josh-except-not-quite into the hotel and up to the front desk.
Josh flashed a toothy grin at the receptionist, sliding his hand toward her keyboard.
"Hello, do you mind if we just use the restroom real fast?"
The lady watched Josh subtly slip a twenty under her mouse pad and nodded. And so Drake was led into the mens' bathroom.
Where he was immediately slammed into a stall and up against a quickly closed and locked door. Lips attacked his own and hands crept up his shirt and all Drake could do was moan in pleasure.
"God, I've missed you."
Drake whimpered as Josh stuck a leg inbetween Drake's, closing his eyes and clutching Josh's shoulders.
"Fuck, what are you wearing? These jeans are skin tight, and this shirt - "
Josh bit Drake's collarbone and yanked his hand down Drake's pants.
"I love it when you go all Drake Parker on me."
--
Josh waited until he was seated at a candle lit table, sitting in front of the pseudo-Drake, before he opened his mouth.
Pseudo-Drake beat him to it.
"So, what do you think?"
What did Josh think? What did Josh think?
"Nice place, huh? Yeah. I love it here. Plus, I've got connections."
Drake waved his hand to draw Josh's eyes across the span of the restaurant. It was completely empty. The circular windows were the only brightness to be seen throughout the saturated room.
"Makes it okay for me to do this."
Sliding aside the candle and leaning over the table, Drake reached for Josh's face and pulled him in for a kiss.
Longer and deeper than the one in the entrance way, Josh lost all feeling in any place in his body except for his lips. His lips that were on fire. Lips that were suddenly eased open by a tongue. A tongue that swooped into Josh's mouth and made him sigh.
And even though Josh had so many questions and so many reasons to be freaking out and probably shouldn't be gravitating towards this man he was desperatly kissing and maybe it would be best if they would just put the damn candle on the table and that way Josh could pull Drake closer and then -
"Ah hem."
The boys yanked apart, startled. The blushing waiter looked away, tapping his pen on his pad.
"I, uh, could come back. If you need more time."
Drake laughed lightly and turned to Josh.
"Do you know what you want?"
And then, to Josh's horror, he blurted out the first thing on his mind.
"You."
Eyebrows raising and grin widening, Drake's eyes glazed over. Josh gulped and wondered what he had gotten himself into.
"I'll come back."
--
Drake's mind was bothering him, a kind of nagging feeling telling him he should maybe probably stop. It was really annoying. And distracting him from feeling good, and Drake knew he was feeling good.
Minus that thing, that thing called a, a -
Conscious.
Whatever the hell that means.
But it was keeping him from fully enjoying this moment.
This really, really surreal situation.
But did it matter how weird this situation was, because Drake felt awesome. No, better than awesome. Amazing. Especially when Josh did that.
"Fuck, yes!"
Josh paused his movements to gently kiss Drake's nose.
"Room?"
"Fuck yes."
The two boys pulled apart and attempted to rearrange their clothes into a semblance of order. As Drake fixed his shirt and began to bend over to retrieve his fallen leather jacket, Josh grabbed his forearm and gazed curiously at it.
"Where's your tattoo?"
Oh, yes. That nagging voice inside his head. It was trying to tell him there was something seriously strange about this whole thing.
Drake shrugged his shoulders and Josh's mouth slowly fell open.
--
After a few more minutes of over-the-table kissing, Drake suggested they go back to the hotel.
"Screw dinner, let's go."
Josh was not about to start arguing.
As soon as they stepped outside, Josh felt the rush of cold. Coughing heavily, Josh wrapped his arms around himself in an attempt to keep the warmth in.
Drake clicked his tongue and shook his head.
"I'm telling you, you've gotta quit smoking."
Josh furrowed his brow.
"Uh, I don't smoke."
Halting his steps, Drake cast an incredulous stare at Josh.
"You're kidding, right?"
Josh could only gape.
Oh yes, this wasn't Drake-Drake.
Pseudo-Drake gave Josh a once-over, trailing his eyes from Josh's head to Josh's feet, then back up again.
"What?"
"What?"
--
Drake exited the restroom in a daze.
Talk about a damn hot experience.
Exhaling heavily, he zipped up his jacket and made his way out of the door.
Only to run smack into a warm figure.
"Ooof!"
"Gah!"
Blinking at the stumbling man, Drake almost jumped in the air.
"Josh?!"
"Drake!"
They both began exclaiming and babbling at once, both their stories drowning each other out. Stopping at the same time, they hesitated before Drake launched himself into Josh's arms.
"You, and - "
"You, two, and - "
"You, too?"
"You, too?"
Josh laughed and Drake snuggled his face into Josh's neck and Josh held him close.
"That was just really strange."
"Super trippy."
Drake glanced up at Josh and smiled. This was his Josh. His Josh.
Smirking deviously, Drake reached up on his tip toes to whisper into Josh's ear.
"Room?"
Josh didn't even have to think twice.
"Oh, yes."
Author: stttmsbwa
Characters/Pairings: Josh Peck/Drake Parker, Drake Bell/Josh Nichols
Summary: There's been some sort of a mix-up here.
A/N: This is for you, Glyn. I'm sorry it took so long to write. WARNING to all: This is just really silly. So, please suspend reality for a little bit and enjoy some suuuuper cracky fun.
Josh exhaled softly and checked his watch. 3:23.
He had said to meet in front of the hotel at 3. And Josh could only assume that he had meant 3 PM. Because to meet in front of the hotel at 3 AM? Well, that would just be absurd. (On the other hand, something that Drake would totally do.)
Drake had to've meant the afternoon. A rock star's lifestyle isn't that crazy-go-nuts. (Although, knowing Drake, it would be). Besides, the whole point of this was to grab an early dinner.
A nice, early dinner for two.
Two lovers.
Gah.
Boyfriends.
Erm.
Brothers.
Eeesh.
Stepbrothers.
Yes. Stepbrothers who were close. Very close. Close in ways that made Josh blush when he'd think about it too much.
And Josh Nichols had a tendency to think too much.
Just like Drake Parker had a tendency to be late.
Rolling his eyes at the thought, Josh checked his watch again. 3:30. Drake was half an hour late.
Thinking about it, this wasn't that bad. The usual late timeframe is 15 minutes to half an hour.
Drake would show up at any second.
Any second now.
Yes. Any minute.
(Josh was going to kill Drake. He was going to lecture him, chastise him, and then kill him.)
Grumbling to himself, Josh swiveled his head around, eyes searching for a familiar head of red hair.
And then he saw him.
At first Josh thought, "Finally!" But after a double take, and then a third take, Josh couldn't help but shake his head.
Was that really Drake?
The redhead he was watching walked in Josh's direction casually, as if he were in no hurry but as if he were one with the small crowd. Big sun glasses and slight stubble covering his face. Sporting slim, gray slacks and a black pea coat.
There was no way this could be Drake. Drake Parker. Josh's Drake.
Drake would be rushing to get to Josh. He would be wearing something classy yet young. He wouldn't take the care to make sure he was unnoticed.
Not that Drake was an obnoxious press junkie. (Well, to be fair, he did enjoy the attention. Very much. Just not when he knew Josh was around.)
But this person? This person could not be Drake.
So why was he walking in Josh's direction? Casting short glances and almost contained smirks in Josh's direction?
And why was he reaching for Josh's arm?
"Hey, babe. You're here earlier than usual."
The next thing Josh knew, he was being pulled along the sidewalk along side this, this -
"Drake?!"
Drake hushed him and continued walking at a steady pace.
"Quiet. Don't want the paparazzo to spot us."
"But - "
"Almost there."
Taking a harp turn down an alleyway, Drake guided Josh through heavy doors into a dimly lit building and down stone steps. Once the door closed behind them with a slam, Drake whipped off his glasses and turned to face Josh.
"Why, hello there handsome."
And then he kissed Josh. Square on the lips.
Josh stood absolutely still for a second before melting into the contact. It was brief but soft and sweet, Drake's stubble tickling Josh's cheeks as he pulled back.
"Mmm, too long."
Josh couldn't respond. Drake smirked up at him, rubbing his hands up and down Josh's arms.
"What's up with you? You're acting strange. And what are you wearing, you look - "
A man walked into the entrance way, cutting Drake off.
"Mr. Bell? Your table is this way, you can follow me."
--
There was always an excuse (nothing was too sticky for Drake to work himself out of), and as Drake pushed through the crowd he tried to come up with a really good one. One that Josh would believe.
"I was thinking we meant 3 in the morning, and I didn't remember until last minute."
Drake tripped over a lady's foot as he maneuvered his was between a fat man and a young girl.
"No, that wouldn't work."
Panting a little, Drake caught sight of the hotel.
"Or would it?"
Drake began to work on his story (he was Drake Parker; he always had a story) as he approached the hotel. But there was something wrong with the situation.
Where was Josh?
Drake pulled his cell phone out of his pocket and checked the time. 4:02. Would Josh leave if Drake was this late? He never had before.
So why wasn't he where he said he'd be?
Before Drake could even open his phone and hit the speed dial that would answer all his questions, arms snaked around his waist and drew him close to another body.
Gasping in fear, Drake struggled against the grip and whipped his head around to see who was behind him.
A scruffy, grinning Josh greeted him.
"Well, hi."
Drake exhaled a sigh of relief. It was only -
What?
"Josh?!"
Shushing the bewildered Drake, Josh released his embrace and pulled on Drake's elbow.
"Not so loud, you dork. Come inside and we can talk."
Drake followed the seems-to-be-Josh-except-not-quite into the hotel and up to the front desk.
Josh flashed a toothy grin at the receptionist, sliding his hand toward her keyboard.
"Hello, do you mind if we just use the restroom real fast?"
The lady watched Josh subtly slip a twenty under her mouse pad and nodded. And so Drake was led into the mens' bathroom.
Where he was immediately slammed into a stall and up against a quickly closed and locked door. Lips attacked his own and hands crept up his shirt and all Drake could do was moan in pleasure.
"God, I've missed you."
Drake whimpered as Josh stuck a leg inbetween Drake's, closing his eyes and clutching Josh's shoulders.
"Fuck, what are you wearing? These jeans are skin tight, and this shirt - "
Josh bit Drake's collarbone and yanked his hand down Drake's pants.
"I love it when you go all Drake Parker on me."
--
Josh waited until he was seated at a candle lit table, sitting in front of the pseudo-Drake, before he opened his mouth.
Pseudo-Drake beat him to it.
"So, what do you think?"
What did Josh think? What did Josh think?
"Nice place, huh? Yeah. I love it here. Plus, I've got connections."
Drake waved his hand to draw Josh's eyes across the span of the restaurant. It was completely empty. The circular windows were the only brightness to be seen throughout the saturated room.
"Makes it okay for me to do this."
Sliding aside the candle and leaning over the table, Drake reached for Josh's face and pulled him in for a kiss.
Longer and deeper than the one in the entrance way, Josh lost all feeling in any place in his body except for his lips. His lips that were on fire. Lips that were suddenly eased open by a tongue. A tongue that swooped into Josh's mouth and made him sigh.
And even though Josh had so many questions and so many reasons to be freaking out and probably shouldn't be gravitating towards this man he was desperatly kissing and maybe it would be best if they would just put the damn candle on the table and that way Josh could pull Drake closer and then -
"Ah hem."
The boys yanked apart, startled. The blushing waiter looked away, tapping his pen on his pad.
"I, uh, could come back. If you need more time."
Drake laughed lightly and turned to Josh.
"Do you know what you want?"
And then, to Josh's horror, he blurted out the first thing on his mind.
"You."
Eyebrows raising and grin widening, Drake's eyes glazed over. Josh gulped and wondered what he had gotten himself into.
"I'll come back."
--
Drake's mind was bothering him, a kind of nagging feeling telling him he should maybe probably stop. It was really annoying. And distracting him from feeling good, and Drake knew he was feeling good.
Minus that thing, that thing called a, a -
Conscious.
Whatever the hell that means.
But it was keeping him from fully enjoying this moment.
This really, really surreal situation.
But did it matter how weird this situation was, because Drake felt awesome. No, better than awesome. Amazing. Especially when Josh did that.
"Fuck, yes!"
Josh paused his movements to gently kiss Drake's nose.
"Room?"
"Fuck yes."
The two boys pulled apart and attempted to rearrange their clothes into a semblance of order. As Drake fixed his shirt and began to bend over to retrieve his fallen leather jacket, Josh grabbed his forearm and gazed curiously at it.
"Where's your tattoo?"
Oh, yes. That nagging voice inside his head. It was trying to tell him there was something seriously strange about this whole thing.
Drake shrugged his shoulders and Josh's mouth slowly fell open.
--
After a few more minutes of over-the-table kissing, Drake suggested they go back to the hotel.
"Screw dinner, let's go."
Josh was not about to start arguing.
As soon as they stepped outside, Josh felt the rush of cold. Coughing heavily, Josh wrapped his arms around himself in an attempt to keep the warmth in.
Drake clicked his tongue and shook his head.
"I'm telling you, you've gotta quit smoking."
Josh furrowed his brow.
"Uh, I don't smoke."
Halting his steps, Drake cast an incredulous stare at Josh.
"You're kidding, right?"
Josh could only gape.
Oh yes, this wasn't Drake-Drake.
Pseudo-Drake gave Josh a once-over, trailing his eyes from Josh's head to Josh's feet, then back up again.
"What?"
"What?"
--
Drake exited the restroom in a daze.
Talk about a damn hot experience.
Exhaling heavily, he zipped up his jacket and made his way out of the door.
Only to run smack into a warm figure.
"Ooof!"
"Gah!"
Blinking at the stumbling man, Drake almost jumped in the air.
"Josh?!"
"Drake!"
They both began exclaiming and babbling at once, both their stories drowning each other out. Stopping at the same time, they hesitated before Drake launched himself into Josh's arms.
"You, and - "
"You, two, and - "
"You, too?"
"You, too?"
Josh laughed and Drake snuggled his face into Josh's neck and Josh held him close.
"That was just really strange."
"Super trippy."
Drake glanced up at Josh and smiled. This was his Josh. His Josh.
Smirking deviously, Drake reached up on his tip toes to whisper into Josh's ear.
"Room?"
Josh didn't even have to think twice.
"Oh, yes."