Repeat!
I might start writing in my journal again. I might start coming back online again. I might even be over the whole myspace thing, who knows. All I know is the last couple days have been hell. I've been nothing but crabby and pissed, and I just want this week to be over. It doesn't help that I have to work the next two close shifts but whatever.
Why can't guys be normal? Why can't they treat girls with respect? And why can't they just have one? What's the deal with guys needed to have more than one girl, whether it's more than one girlfriend, or a girlfriend and a whole bunch of side girls just to hang out with when your not around? I don't get it. Why is it that I can't be happy when it comes to guys? I feel like everything was perfect Freshman, and Sophmore year, when relationships weren't that serious. Everything was perfect with me and Doug, and I fucked that one up. Then I moved on to someone who I thought I was going to spend the rest of my life with, Gary. Well that didn't happen and I got fucked over myself. Not only did he cheat on me on my last day of my Junior year going into the biggest year of my life, but he also cheated on me again when I was at my cousin's house having a girl's night. I thought I moved on with Jerad, but that didn't work out, and now there's Twinky. I like Twinky so much! I would like me to be the only one who he kisses, and sleeps over, and hang out with, and all that jazz, but I'm not. I'm not used to dating a guy who has a lot of friends that are girls. He always tells me that none of them mean anything and I know that they don't but I'm just such a jealous person I can't get over the fact that he doesn't want to hang out with just me!?!
Yesterday was Gary's birthday. It was the first time I talked to him since our big fall out the day before I left to go to Mexico, which was the GREATEST THING IN MY LIFE! *By the way!* He followed me and O'neill everywhere last night and it was kinda creepy. Hanging out with Urbanski does really help though, even though sometimes he makes you feel like shit, it's all good! Cause you know he doesn't mean it.
There's so much going on right now, I just want to run away and scream!
Why can't guys be normal? Why can't they treat girls with respect? And why can't they just have one? What's the deal with guys needed to have more than one girl, whether it's more than one girlfriend, or a girlfriend and a whole bunch of side girls just to hang out with when your not around? I don't get it. Why is it that I can't be happy when it comes to guys? I feel like everything was perfect Freshman, and Sophmore year, when relationships weren't that serious. Everything was perfect with me and Doug, and I fucked that one up. Then I moved on to someone who I thought I was going to spend the rest of my life with, Gary. Well that didn't happen and I got fucked over myself. Not only did he cheat on me on my last day of my Junior year going into the biggest year of my life, but he also cheated on me again when I was at my cousin's house having a girl's night. I thought I moved on with Jerad, but that didn't work out, and now there's Twinky. I like Twinky so much! I would like me to be the only one who he kisses, and sleeps over, and hang out with, and all that jazz, but I'm not. I'm not used to dating a guy who has a lot of friends that are girls. He always tells me that none of them mean anything and I know that they don't but I'm just such a jealous person I can't get over the fact that he doesn't want to hang out with just me!?!
Yesterday was Gary's birthday. It was the first time I talked to him since our big fall out the day before I left to go to Mexico, which was the GREATEST THING IN MY LIFE! *By the way!* He followed me and O'neill everywhere last night and it was kinda creepy. Hanging out with Urbanski does really help though, even though sometimes he makes you feel like shit, it's all good! Cause you know he doesn't mean it.
There's so much going on right now, I just want to run away and scream!