(no subject)
So tonight was some sucessful fun. Picked up J-Moons, along with Jamie and Tommy. Rode that shit to Port Jeff. Got there, went to McDonalds, Got some hot pretzels...Tommy got some Hulk Ice Cream. Jill wanted the Ninga Turtle. And then she said something funny...i think it went alittle something like this "I pick who i like based on color" Oh man...that jillian mooney <3 Then got bored with Port Jeff so we went to Smithtown...while Jillian sang songs. Funny shit. Got to Smithtown and tommy says park in the Waldbaums parking lot and we'll walk around (where else? lol) so we go to park and we see Lauren!! hehehe!! We all talked alittle and then decided to call it a night. Brought Jill home and Jamie left and then went home. Tommy bought Texas Chainsaw Massacre, but for some odd reason its freaking me out more now than it is when i saw it in the theartre. I'm scared...so i came up here to write in my journal. I'm still scared cause i can here the sounds and of that scary music "dun dun dunnnn"...creepy shit.
So...i know that every once and a while i all of the sudden blurt out major theories, thoughts, wishes...etc. But lately its been happening more often, I've been actually *thinking* about things and life and whats going to happen in the future. To be perfectly honest I'm scared. There are so many ways i could have made my life better! By not being a failure in school. I just think i should have tried so much harder...i'm sure i could have passed that math regents at least the 2nd time i took it...instead of the 4th (lol...which i didnt even pass it the 4th time...my mom had to argue for those 2 points...sad..)I just think that even though i am only 18 i could have lived a fuller life...in certain aspects. And now, i am going to a school i said i would never aim to go to, because i just rejected from all the others...no scholarships, because i didnt apply for any...laziness.. I could have had excellant prom plans if i wasnt lazy and didnt wait so long to make them...i cant believe we still dont have plans. But the one thing i did realize when i was thinking...i am so glad to have the friends that i have. My little group...Molly, Laura, Alicia, Jillian. We are an awesome group of friends together...i like that we all get along so well and everything..its nice...it makes me happie :) So yea...i dont know...I am alittle depressed about school and stuff...and also the fact that school is hard right now and the fact that i have reached my pinnacle of laziness. Laziness....thats my weakness. Damnit...and here it comes again...i would write more...but...
So...i know that every once and a while i all of the sudden blurt out major theories, thoughts, wishes...etc. But lately its been happening more often, I've been actually *thinking* about things and life and whats going to happen in the future. To be perfectly honest I'm scared. There are so many ways i could have made my life better! By not being a failure in school. I just think i should have tried so much harder...i'm sure i could have passed that math regents at least the 2nd time i took it...instead of the 4th (lol...which i didnt even pass it the 4th time...my mom had to argue for those 2 points...sad..)I just think that even though i am only 18 i could have lived a fuller life...in certain aspects. And now, i am going to a school i said i would never aim to go to, because i just rejected from all the others...no scholarships, because i didnt apply for any...laziness.. I could have had excellant prom plans if i wasnt lazy and didnt wait so long to make them...i cant believe we still dont have plans. But the one thing i did realize when i was thinking...i am so glad to have the friends that i have. My little group...Molly, Laura, Alicia, Jillian. We are an awesome group of friends together...i like that we all get along so well and everything..its nice...it makes me happie :) So yea...i dont know...I am alittle depressed about school and stuff...and also the fact that school is hard right now and the fact that i have reached my pinnacle of laziness. Laziness....thats my weakness. Damnit...and here it comes again...i would write more...but...