(no subject)
14 weeks… go to the specialist. They do an ultrasound and we see two feet, two hands, ten toes, ten fingers. She tries to see the heart chambers but the baby is playing with its hands right over its chest so she can’t see the heart. She jiggles my tummy so the baby will quit playing patty-cake, I scream. Dang it… how many times do I have tell everyone that I have severe pain in my navel area and right above it. You know, the area that is all swollen and huge! Geesh! I swear, sometimes I think everyone else thinks that it’s perfectly normal for me to look 7 months pregnant in the upper abdomen and the real 14 weeks pregnant in the lower abdomen. Lower abdomen as in where the uterus is.
Again, there is no concern whatsoever for this huge thing or for the pain. They treat me like I just can’t handle the “pain” of pregnancy. Eh. The specialist also tells me that I must be constipated and more than likely it’s because of the Prometrium. She tells me that I should have stopped taking it at 12 weeks and the number 1 side effect is constipation. Gee, my doctor didn’t tell me that. Grrrr. I stop taking it.
Other than the ultrasound though, the specialist said they couldn’t do anything else until I was 16 weeks. Of course I knew that. Damn it! However, I will say that they convinced me that the only really sure-fire way to check for all the abnormalities associated with AMA was from an amnio. So that relieved my tension about missing the window for the other tests. I guess the trip was worth it even though it was expensive and I have to go back for the amnio in two weeks.
And while I still didn’t think my pain/basketball problem was constipation, discontinuing the Prometrium did increase my ability in that area from every 3 days to every other day. So I was feeling better about that in general even though the bloated hard thing was still there and I was still in pain.
15 weeks… I’m back at my doctor’s office for the regular check up. He listens for the heart beat, we hear it and that’s it. He comments about my decision to have the amnio and he’s ready to leave the room. I stop him… Whoa, wait a damn minute, what about this thing and the pain that is getting worse. He checks me again for a hernia. He says there’s nothing there and that I’m not drinking enough water or eating enough fiber. It’s constipation. I grumble… If I’m going to the bathroom just like a normal person, then how in the world could it be constipation????
I’m getting angry and he knows it. He finally says, “well I could send you to a surgeon, I guess if they tell you the same thing that I’m telling you then maybe you’ll relax.” I’m about to come off that table and smack him a good one. Relax? Sure, you try to relax when you’re in constant pain. Then he says, “even if they find something, you won’t find a surgeon anywhere that will operate when you’re pregnant.” Okay, fine, I get that. But what if the something they find is life threatening to the baby or to me? Shouldn’t we at least know what it is even if they won’t do anything about it? I guess I just don’t understand this mentally of “oh well you’re pregnant so we don’t care”. They should care even more so because I’m pregnant. And wouldn’t knowing what it is, help me relax? It sure would. A hell of a lot more than everyone telling me it’s constipation when I know damn well it’s not. I’m starting to think that their answer to ensure mommies-to-be stay stress-free is to tell them everything’s normal even if they know it’s not. I’m just flabbergasted at the mentality but YES, oh yes, send me to a surgeon.
I guess they can work fast when they really want to because I was at the surgeon’s office the very next day. But it was not to be. The minute I walk up to the window to sign in, the receptionist tells me that the doctor was called away to perform surgery on someone who came into the ER and she didn’t know how long he’d be. Well, I understand that. Obviously life and death situation so that takes priority. We reschedule for Friday… two days away.
Those two days had me completely doubting myself and my strong stance that something was wrong with me. By the time I got to the surgeon’s office I was thinking that maybe this was a waste time. The wait in the waiting room was long… very long… by the second hour I had just about convinced myself that this was stupid. My doctor AND the specialist both had told me it was constipation and here I was sitting in a surgeon’s office where people with REAL problems are coming and going. What if he finds nothing? How embarrassing that will be and I’ve never been very good at swallowing “I told you so”. That’s it, I was leaving. I grabbed my purse and tried to pry my body out of the most uncomfortable chair imaginable when I hear my name called. Too late. I swallow and follow the nurse into an examining room. I felt like a little kid being summoned to the principal’s office.
The surgeon talks to me about my symptoms. Actually listens to every word until I’m finished. He pokes around on my stomach and says, “uh hmm”. Then pokes around my navel and “uh hmm”s again. Tells me to sit up. Lie down. Stand up. Sit down. Lie down. Sit up. Stand up. Over and over and over. The whole time he’s got one hand above my navel and one hand beside my navel. I’m in pain every time he presses. Then he lies me back down, pushes about 2 inches above my navel and says, “THIS is where it hurts, no?” I answered yes. He says, “you didn’t have to tell me, I know where it hurts.” Then he pushes right on my navel and I about jump off the table. He says, “it hurts there too… you don’t have to tell me.” He sits me back up and takes a seat on a stool. What he tells me was completely unexpected. Final diagnosis… I have not one problem but two and both are compounded by a third. The third being I’m pregnant.
Problem #1… Above my navel area, about 2 inches… I have a hernia. The exact thing my doctor checked me for not once but twice and said wasn’t there. Eh. That’s the big bloated hard thing and what’s causing the most of my pain. Since the hernia is in the abdominal muscle then every time I use that muscle, it aggravates the hernia which triggers the pain. Now that I’m tuned into it, I realize you pretty much can’t do anything without using your abdominal muscle. Sitting, standing, walking, turning… coughing. Oh my gosh! And sneezing! Coughing and sneezing are the absolute worst! Which I guess pretty much explains why I’m in pain more often than not. You use that muscle for practically everything!
Problem #2… Behind my naval and slightly to the left… I have a cyst or a growth. Whatever you want to call it. It was caused by a laparoscopic incision from a surgery that I had when I was 19. The scar tissue built, fat cells adhered to it over the years which caused it to get bigger, etc. During the pregnancy with my daughter 12 years ago, she kicked/nudged/pushed the scar tissue/fat cell growth thing up from underneath my navel where the scar is to directly into my navel cavity. Which explains why my rather pretty “innie” before Shelby became this ugly lopsided “outie” after Shelby. No one told me that the pregnancy “outies” usually go back to being “innies”. I just thought it was part of it. It never occurred to me, or to any doctor that I’ve seen in the last 12 years for that matter, that that was not normal. Anyway, now that I’m pregnant again, the uterus is pushing on the navel area of course so the growth has no where to go. Touching it causes pain because it shouldn’t be there. Luckily, this is not constant pain right now. It only hurts when I touch it or bump it. Bummer thing is… the bigger my belly gets the harder it is to not bump it or touch it against something.
The surgeon concludes his time with me telling me what I already knew. He can’t operate until after I have the baby. He thinks it might be possible to get to both areas from the same incision if he cuts directly in between them. Then he adds that probably my doctor could do the dual operation immediately after the C-Section. Now I’m wondering in my head if I really want my OB-GYN to remove a hernia and a cyst when he didn’t seem to think that either one existed in the first place. Maybe he should just stick to babies and let the surgeons do the other stuff.
Anyway, I left there feeling a little odd. Relieved that I knew what was wrong and I wasn’t dying and the baby wasn’t in danger. Elated that I could “neener, neener” my OB and the specialist. Which was strange in of itself. I was happy that I had not one but two rather serious diagnosis’? Then suddenly scared… what was gonna happen as the baby got bigger? Could this already unbearable pain conceivably get worse? Could the baby squish either one and make something pop? What’s gonna happen to the abdominal muscle when it splits and separates for the pregnancy when it’s already weakened by a tear from the hernia? Then all the thoughts about the surgery itself. If it could be done at the time of the C-Section that would be good. One recovery period. But would the recovery be harder? Would it prohibit me from taking care of my newborn? Lots of thoughts and feelings swimming around in my head but I have to put all that aside for a few days because it’s Friday afternoon and my amnio is scheduled for Monday. Oh crap-a-roni.
Sixteen weeks… The amnio… It was probably the scariest thing I’ve ever been through. So much could go wrong. I knew all the risks. I had good vibes overall going in but a couple of things changed that as we went along… One, the doctor asked me at least 4 times before he actually stuck the needle in if I wanted to proceed. And two, he told me that while he was going in I shouldn’t make any sudden movements… like jerking from pain, coughing or sneezing. That would be very bad. Oh my! How do you control that? I think it was those two things that made it so scary.
So I’m all prepped up and my hands are above my head. My belly with all its “ow-ie” parts sticking out for anyone to poke. The doctor comes in and I tell him about the hernia and the cyst and point to where they are and tell him please don’t touch there. He says he’ll try. Gulp. They start with the sonogram to see where the baby is and the first thing that pops up is the baby’s butt. The doctor immediately asks me if I want to know what it is. I say yes so he turns the screen towards me and asks what I think. I laugh and say, “I think that would be a boy”. He says, I think you’re right. Eh. It’s a boy. My husband goes, “huh?” Yes, dear. You got your boy. That relieved some tension in the room.
Just in case you don’t know this, they say that one of the dangerous parts of an amnio is making sure that they don’t poke the baby while the needle is going in. That’s why they watch the baby on the sonogram screen. But that once the needle is in then it’s okay. As in, if the baby bumps into it after that, it’s no problem. He’s comfortably on the right side so they start to insert the needle on the left. Scary stuff but kind of reassuring that you can watch the whole thing as it’s happening. The needle is so small though, for them to get enough fluid to do the test, it takes a realllllly long time. At least is seems like it. I was told it would take about 3 minutes. Those were the longest 3 minutes ever… and seriously, I think it was more like 8 or 9.
About half-way through… I’m still struggling to not make any sudden movements. That was made a tiny bit easier since it wasn’t really painful. But then my curious little boy decides he wants to know what this shiny thing is that’s invading his safe place so he goes to investigate. He starts swatting at the needle like he’s trying to grab a hold of it. At first this is funny and while everyone else is laughing, all I get to do is smile because I know I’m not supposed to move! Not such a great time for the wiggle worm to be entertaining the crowd. It quickly turns serious when he starts to actually make contact. He bumps the needle and that in turn hurts me. He’s just going to town… bump, bump, bump. The doctor knows this is not good for me so he keeps reminding me, “don’t move, don’t move”. Now, I’m struggling to breathe because I’m concentrating so much on not moving every time he gives me another jolt. Finally, the doc says he’s got enough and it’s out and over with. Whew!
They tell me 7-10 days for the results and push me out the door with strict instructions that I am to go to my OB/GYN immediately for a Rho-GAM. That stops me. Wait! I had a Rho-GAM already. They explain to me that they just poked a hole in my uterus (duh!) and IF any of the fluid leaks out into my body it could be very bad. I knew this but I guess I didn’t register it with being that possible + blood from the amniotic fluid could leak into my - bloodstream. I just thought that leaking amniotic fluid was bad because well, the baby needs the fluid and if it leaks out, well, you know. So I head to my doctor’s office for another Rho-GAM. I have to wait because I didn’t have an appointment and they have to squeeze me in. Luckily it wasn’t a squeeze to see the doctor, just the nurse. After that, we head home. I go to bed per doctor’s orders. And we wait...