[KRYS: Crying]
Title: Crying
Pairings: KRYS-centric; Kyumin, Yewook, broken!KyuWook, broken!KyuSung
Genre: Angst, Romance, future~ish
Rating: PG
Summary: Kyuhyun was lost for words, lost in love, and lost in his regrets.
A/N: Meh. Random 'me ranting'. Nothing much. Comments make me <3. Give me <3?
When Yesung told him that he had a crush on Ryeowook, Kyuhyun didn’t know how to react. He was actually lost for words for the very first time in his life.
“Are you thinking of a witty reply? Something sarcastic?” Yesung sighed sadly, “I probably shouldn’t have told you, now you’re going to tell Wookie and Sungmin, right?”
Kyuhyun continued gaping at the older man; he hadn’t even recovered from the first blow when Yesung dealt another one at him. Even though Yesung probably had not meant what he said, he was never too great with words, but Kyuhyun definitely got the meaning. He knew exactly where to draw the line about being sarcastic, what issues were suitable for poking fun at. Moreover, Kyuhyun definitely knew what words were safe too say and what weren’t. He wasn’t Kangin.
But Yesung had not thought the same of him. He probably thought he was an out-of control, cocky, sarcastic little magnae that he had to put up with, an immature little brat that he had to tolerate simply because they had the best vocals in the group.
“Why aren’t you talking?” Yesung held his head in his hands. “You know it’s less painful if you make fun of me in front of me, instead of keeping it to yourself.”
Kyuhyun felt like crying. He had never meant to hurt his feelings. His way of expressing himself was to playfully attack the other person. Sure, sometimes he had gone a tad bit too far, especially with Yesung, but that only illustrated how much he adored the other person. And now, he was accusing Kyuhyun of making fun of him. He didn’t know what hurt more, the disappointment, the rejection, or simply the misunderstanding. It hurt, especially since Kyuhyun had treated Yesung with a different air.
It was true; Kyuhyun still had lingering feelings for Yesung. Feelings that he never revealed because he would face the rejection of both his company and the man he loved.
“Whatever, if you don’t even want to talk to me, then it’s fine.” Yesung got up to leave as Kyuhyun could only stare at him. He saw the hurt in his eyes, the feeling of rejection because Kyuhyun had been the first one he approached and he got shot down hard.
“Do you really have nothing to say to me?” Yesung turned around and gave him one last look.
Say something. Anything.
“No.” Kyuhyun mentally slapped himself.
“Okay.” Yesung left his room without casting a second glance.
“Why do you like Ryeowook?” Kyuhyun whispered to himself after the door closed by itself. The words lingered inside the room as it merely found one of its two owners.
Kyuhyun had also developed unconscious feelings for the eternal magnae. His soft vulnerability made him so sweet, his undying patience and tolerance towards everything made Kyuhyun puzzled with awe. He had always been so sweet and generous with everything. The countless number of times he had offered to make food for Kyuhyun whenever he hinted that he was hungry, each time bringing him something new and flavourful.
With Ryeowook, Kyuhyun had never been sarcastic with him, but that did not change how he felt about the older boy. He just wanted to hold him, to hold hands with him. He just wanted to hug him, hug him close during the long hours at night when they should be resting, hug him close on camera and tell the world that he loved him.
Everything lashed away within moments, both Yesung and Ryeowook seemed to magically withdraw themselves from his life.
Sungmin aside, Kyuhyun suddenly felt empty. His two best friends, both of them holding a part of Kyuhyun’s heart for the longest time, were probably going to get together.
And he’d be there, looking at them from the sidelines with a smile on his face. As the third member of KRY, as a member of Super Junior, as a member of Super Junior M, he would support them.
But as Cho Kyuhyun, he would curse them.
Because he didn’t want them together. He wanted them. He wanted them to be separate, wanted to be with them separately.
Cho Kyuhyun was snarky, sarcastic, mean.
But deep down, could he really curse his two best friends? Or were these emotional outbursts fueled solely by jealousy?
Kyuhyun never once answered the last question, not even the day they had announced to the rest of the members that they were going out, not even the day when they went on a semi-secret honeymoon trip that he himself had planned, not even the day when Yesung took Ryeowook’s hand in marriage.
Kyuhyun never planned to answer that question, because it would only leave him raw and bare, exposed and stinging with pain. He had plastered himself with so many band-aids; the wound had almost healed itself.
But Yesung asked him suddenly, twenty years later, re-opening the gash as the scab disintegrated into bits. The dead cells fluttered away in the wind as his bloody wound gushed painfully, the feeling of regret functioning like salt and lemon juice alike.
“Kyuhyun-ah, what were you thinking on that day?” Yesung asked him when Ryeowook had went to the washroom and Sungmin was in line buying food.
“What day?”
“Y’know, the day I told you I had feelings for Wookie. You just looked at me.” Yesung whispered softly.
“You still remember that day?” Kyuhyun faked a laugh at him. “Do you have nothing more important to remember?”
“Because that was one of the most memorable days of my life. I was finally able to make a decision.” Yesung leaned in and whispered into his ear. “I was finally able to convince myself that he was the one for me, not you.”
Kyuhyun was again lost for words. It felt like a replay of the exact same scene twenty years ago.
“Why do you look exactly like you did twenty years ago?” Yesung punched him on the arm.
“What?” Kyuhyun closed his eyes and blinked back fresh tears, sniffling his nose in the process.
“That look, that cold look you gave me was the last straw.” Yesung gave him a warm smile, the same smile whenever the three of them were about to perform on stage. A smile that purged him of stress and pressure, a smile eased his trembling heart, a smile that made him happy. A smile that only Ryeowook and Kyuhyun received before their stages. A Yesung smile.
“Nonetheless, the main thing is that we’re happy right?” Yesung smiled happily when Sungmin returned with a tray of food, their daughter following behind him. Ryeowook had also returned holding onto their son. Yesung waved energetically at the four before his hand held his once more.
“Yep.” Kyuhyun faked another smile, all the while suppressing his tears that were begging him to be released. “All happy.”
“Daddy, why are you crying?” Sungeun tugged at his sleeve. Kyuhyun didn’t even know he was crying.
Pairings: KRYS-centric; Kyumin, Yewook, broken!KyuWook, broken!KyuSung
Genre: Angst, Romance, future~ish
Rating: PG
Summary: Kyuhyun was lost for words, lost in love, and lost in his regrets.
A/N: Meh. Random 'me ranting'. Nothing much. Comments make me <3. Give me <3?
When Yesung told him that he had a crush on Ryeowook, Kyuhyun didn’t know how to react. He was actually lost for words for the very first time in his life.
“Are you thinking of a witty reply? Something sarcastic?” Yesung sighed sadly, “I probably shouldn’t have told you, now you’re going to tell Wookie and Sungmin, right?”
Kyuhyun continued gaping at the older man; he hadn’t even recovered from the first blow when Yesung dealt another one at him. Even though Yesung probably had not meant what he said, he was never too great with words, but Kyuhyun definitely got the meaning. He knew exactly where to draw the line about being sarcastic, what issues were suitable for poking fun at. Moreover, Kyuhyun definitely knew what words were safe too say and what weren’t. He wasn’t Kangin.
But Yesung had not thought the same of him. He probably thought he was an out-of control, cocky, sarcastic little magnae that he had to put up with, an immature little brat that he had to tolerate simply because they had the best vocals in the group.
“Why aren’t you talking?” Yesung held his head in his hands. “You know it’s less painful if you make fun of me in front of me, instead of keeping it to yourself.”
Kyuhyun felt like crying. He had never meant to hurt his feelings. His way of expressing himself was to playfully attack the other person. Sure, sometimes he had gone a tad bit too far, especially with Yesung, but that only illustrated how much he adored the other person. And now, he was accusing Kyuhyun of making fun of him. He didn’t know what hurt more, the disappointment, the rejection, or simply the misunderstanding. It hurt, especially since Kyuhyun had treated Yesung with a different air.
It was true; Kyuhyun still had lingering feelings for Yesung. Feelings that he never revealed because he would face the rejection of both his company and the man he loved.
“Whatever, if you don’t even want to talk to me, then it’s fine.” Yesung got up to leave as Kyuhyun could only stare at him. He saw the hurt in his eyes, the feeling of rejection because Kyuhyun had been the first one he approached and he got shot down hard.
“Do you really have nothing to say to me?” Yesung turned around and gave him one last look.
Say something. Anything.
“No.” Kyuhyun mentally slapped himself.
“Okay.” Yesung left his room without casting a second glance.
“Why do you like Ryeowook?” Kyuhyun whispered to himself after the door closed by itself. The words lingered inside the room as it merely found one of its two owners.
Kyuhyun had also developed unconscious feelings for the eternal magnae. His soft vulnerability made him so sweet, his undying patience and tolerance towards everything made Kyuhyun puzzled with awe. He had always been so sweet and generous with everything. The countless number of times he had offered to make food for Kyuhyun whenever he hinted that he was hungry, each time bringing him something new and flavourful.
With Ryeowook, Kyuhyun had never been sarcastic with him, but that did not change how he felt about the older boy. He just wanted to hold him, to hold hands with him. He just wanted to hug him, hug him close during the long hours at night when they should be resting, hug him close on camera and tell the world that he loved him.
Everything lashed away within moments, both Yesung and Ryeowook seemed to magically withdraw themselves from his life.
Sungmin aside, Kyuhyun suddenly felt empty. His two best friends, both of them holding a part of Kyuhyun’s heart for the longest time, were probably going to get together.
And he’d be there, looking at them from the sidelines with a smile on his face. As the third member of KRY, as a member of Super Junior, as a member of Super Junior M, he would support them.
But as Cho Kyuhyun, he would curse them.
Because he didn’t want them together. He wanted them. He wanted them to be separate, wanted to be with them separately.
Cho Kyuhyun was snarky, sarcastic, mean.
But deep down, could he really curse his two best friends? Or were these emotional outbursts fueled solely by jealousy?
Kyuhyun never once answered the last question, not even the day they had announced to the rest of the members that they were going out, not even the day when they went on a semi-secret honeymoon trip that he himself had planned, not even the day when Yesung took Ryeowook’s hand in marriage.
Kyuhyun never planned to answer that question, because it would only leave him raw and bare, exposed and stinging with pain. He had plastered himself with so many band-aids; the wound had almost healed itself.
But Yesung asked him suddenly, twenty years later, re-opening the gash as the scab disintegrated into bits. The dead cells fluttered away in the wind as his bloody wound gushed painfully, the feeling of regret functioning like salt and lemon juice alike.
“Kyuhyun-ah, what were you thinking on that day?” Yesung asked him when Ryeowook had went to the washroom and Sungmin was in line buying food.
“What day?”
“Y’know, the day I told you I had feelings for Wookie. You just looked at me.” Yesung whispered softly.
“You still remember that day?” Kyuhyun faked a laugh at him. “Do you have nothing more important to remember?”
“Because that was one of the most memorable days of my life. I was finally able to make a decision.” Yesung leaned in and whispered into his ear. “I was finally able to convince myself that he was the one for me, not you.”
Kyuhyun was again lost for words. It felt like a replay of the exact same scene twenty years ago.
“Why do you look exactly like you did twenty years ago?” Yesung punched him on the arm.
“What?” Kyuhyun closed his eyes and blinked back fresh tears, sniffling his nose in the process.
“That look, that cold look you gave me was the last straw.” Yesung gave him a warm smile, the same smile whenever the three of them were about to perform on stage. A smile that purged him of stress and pressure, a smile eased his trembling heart, a smile that made him happy. A smile that only Ryeowook and Kyuhyun received before their stages. A Yesung smile.
“Nonetheless, the main thing is that we’re happy right?” Yesung smiled happily when Sungmin returned with a tray of food, their daughter following behind him. Ryeowook had also returned holding onto their son. Yesung waved energetically at the four before his hand held his once more.
“Yep.” Kyuhyun faked another smile, all the while suppressing his tears that were begging him to be released. “All happy.”
“Daddy, why are you crying?” Sungeun tugged at his sleeve. Kyuhyun didn’t even know he was crying.