Oh, mah darlin, oh mah darlin, oh mah DAAAAAAAARLIN --
Finally talked to my long lost friend Saturday. It took being in an "alternate state of conscioussness" and getting a little too stupid and a little too honest and taking Jess' phone to text him. "So apprently I'm dying and I really wanted to get rid of this virginity thing... wanna help me out with that?" Then after I'd come to my senses I didn't wanna just leave him wondering, so I kept replying. "Just tell me who you are." "If you knew u wouldn't wanna talk to me; drop it." I told him eventually. Well... Jess sent him a map of FL......... don't ask.
Aparently I used him. Shock to me. I wanna know how. I kept asking, but he wouldn't answer. After a while wouldn't even talk to me. As usual. Hides behind his away messeges since March (when I started my LJ!!!). I wasn't asking him to be a bitch and say "Oh, YEAH? Explain to me who I used YOU because I missed that part of the equation!" I genuinely wanted to know. I wanted the opportunity to apologize. Seneca and Jess say the shoe should be on the other foot (or something like that?). "I want this kid's screen name so I can bitch him out!" Seneca, I heart you. But NO! I continue to defend him. I always will. Regardless. And I'm not doing it b/c I'm blinded or b/c I can't see how he's "abused" me. He hasn't. And he's NOT a horrible person. Apparently I am; and I'd like to know what I did so that I can make it right... or at least make an attempt to... before its too late for me. Before it's Lost and Gone Forever.
Later.
Aparently I used him. Shock to me. I wanna know how. I kept asking, but he wouldn't answer. After a while wouldn't even talk to me. As usual. Hides behind his away messeges since March (when I started my LJ!!!). I wasn't asking him to be a bitch and say "Oh, YEAH? Explain to me who I used YOU because I missed that part of the equation!" I genuinely wanted to know. I wanted the opportunity to apologize. Seneca and Jess say the shoe should be on the other foot (or something like that?). "I want this kid's screen name so I can bitch him out!" Seneca, I heart you. But NO! I continue to defend him. I always will. Regardless. And I'm not doing it b/c I'm blinded or b/c I can't see how he's "abused" me. He hasn't. And he's NOT a horrible person. Apparently I am; and I'd like to know what I did so that I can make it right... or at least make an attempt to... before its too late for me. Before it's Lost and Gone Forever.
Later.