Gone and Back Again Chapter 5A
Title-Gone and Back Again
Disclaimer-Don't own Glee or Torchwood
Warnings-AU.Character death(Torchwood) Slash, Bullying and in later chapters maybe a bit of torture-Torchwood style. A couple of OC's.
Pairings-Eventual Kurt/Blaine Past Ianto/Jack-Past Gwen/Jack-Rhys/Gwen Unrequited Kurt/Jack.
Summary-In which Kurt remembers some unpleasent things and gets invited to a trip of a lifetime
Gone and Back Again Chapter 5A
Three weeks before Christmas, Burt and Carole told their sons they were getting married over dinner. Both Finn and Kurt were ecstatic,
"Really? Cool!"
Kurt clapped, "Finally! Where are you guys getting married? What flowers are you going to use?" he gasped, "Oh my God Carol, we need to get you a wedding dress! We'll need a band, a caterer, a baker-"
"Dude," Finn said, "do we really need all those things? I mean, yea Mom needs a dress but-"
"For the reception, Finn! We'll need food, and entertainment-we need to figure out who we're going to invite and-"
Carole laughed, "Actually Kurt, your father and I were thinking that maybe you would like to plan the wedding!"
Nodding Kurt jumped out of his chair,
"Yes! Yes of course!" he pointed at Carole, "you and me are going to go shopping for a dress this weekend," to his father he said, "and you're going to need a tux Dad," Kurt looked at Finn, "so will you, Finn."
"Aw man, do I have to? Those things are so uncomfortable!"
"You'll be fine."
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Back at school, Karofsky backed off just a little bit. The jock still threw slushies at him and on occasion shoulder checked him into the lockers although not as hard as he used to. Mostly, Karofsky looked at him in fear. Kurt guessed that the jock was waiting for Kurt to tell the entire school that Karofsky had kissed him but he hadn't; and he wouldn't. It wasn't his secret to tell. Sometimes Karofsky would start walking towards him but before got within ten feet of Kurt, Karofsky went another way. Kurt didn't try to reach out to him.
==========================
"What about this dress?"
Kurt scowled at it, "Carole that dress is almost PEACH colored-not to mention that it will definitely not compliment your figure."
Carole sighed and put the dress back,
"We've been looking for three HOURS, Kurt. Maybe we should come back tomorrow-"
"I'm sure the perfect dress is around here-"
Eye's wide Kurt pulled Carole aside,
"And here it is!"
Laughing he pulled the dress out and showed it to her,
"Carole you are going to look beautiful in this!"
"Oh Kurt it's gorgeous!"
"Go on," he gave it to her, "try it on!"
When Carole stepped out of the fitting room something came to Kurt's mind,
One day, we'll be married, Ianto; we'll have a big wedding, a huge cake-
Whatever you want.
"Kurt? Kurt are you ok?"
"What?" he looked at Carole, "I knew it-you look gorgeous, Carole."
Tears in her eyes, Carole walked up to Kurt and caressed his cheek,
"Thank you for doing this, Kurt. It means a lot to me."
Carole's smile reminded Kurt of Lisa's.
"Anything to help you."
==============================
Before going to sleep Carole and Burt talked about the wedding. Five minutes before they went to sleep Kurt came up,
"We were going to be married."
"What?"
Kurt sat down next to his father,
"Lisa and I were going to get married."
"Who?"
Kurt looked at Carole,
"Lisa-she was my girlfriend. I was going to ask her to marry me but…Canary Wharf…"
Burt touched Kurt's shoulder,
"Wake up, kid-come one wake up."
Kurt shook his head,
"It would have been great," Kurt scrunched up his nose, "Jack…I know Jack cared but not like she did and…I was a convenience," he yawned, "it's ok though. I don't really care anymore."
With a final yawn Kurt slumped onto the table. Both Carole and Burt helped him back into his room.
"He's never mentioned a Jack."
Carole wondered if she should tell her soon-to-be-husband what Kurt told her a few weeks ago but decided against it. Whoever Jack was in Kurt's mind, he didn't sound like a good man.
"I'm sure it's nothing, sweetie."
=============================
A week before the wedding Karofsky talked to Kurt before school started
"Hummel," he looked around, scared, "have you told anyone?"
"No I haven't-and like I said, I won't tell anyone, Karofsky."
"Why not?" the jock asked, confused, "why haven't you told? I mean, after all the shit I did and-"
"Look," Kurt said, "Lima, Ohio isn't exactly the most tolerant place. It sucks being gay and living in a town like this so I understand why you don't want people to find out."
Karofsky nodded, "Ok," he took a step back, "just…just remember not to tell anybody."
"I promise."
==============================
Four days before the wedding Blaine invited Kurt for coffee. Delighted Kurt accepted and spent four hours getting ready.
"Hello Kurt," Blaine hugged and pointed to the table, "I ordered a coffee for you."
"Thanks," Kurt sat down, "how are you, Blaine?"
"I'm great; been practicing with the Warblers, doing homework-all the normal things. What about you?"
Kurt leaned in, "Terrific! I'm almost done organizing the wedding. All I need is the band and the flowers and I'll be done."
"I'm impressed, Kurt. You've done so much in so little time."
"Well…" he shrugged, "my father and Carole deserve the best wedding I can give them."
"That's very nice of you Kurt," Blaine took a sip of his coffee, "How have things been for you at school?"
Kurt hummed,
"They've been pretty ok, actually."
"And…" Blaine licked his lips, "what about that bully?"
"Well," Kurt considered telling Blaine the truth but, "I think maybe he grew bored with me. He hasn't really bothered me that much lately."
"That's great," Blaine took his hand; Kurt blushed, "I'm glad he left you alone, Kurt."
"So am I."
============================
They talked for two hours before Kurt had to go back home. Blaine hugged him before leaving. Kurt drew Blaine eating biscotti and drinking coffee before going to sleep.
"Do you, Burt, take Carole to be your wife?"
"I do."
Kurt sniffled and wiped a tear away,
"And do you, Carole take Burt to be your husband?"
Smiling Kurt looked out into the church. Friends of both his father and Carole had come along with a few relatives from Carole side as well. It was small and so far everything was going perfectly.
"I now pronounce you husband and wife; you may now kiss the bride."
I can't wait to be Mrs. Lisa Jones
And I can't wait to be Mr. Ianto Hallet
"Kurt?"
"What?" Brittany smiled at him,
"You went away."
"No I didn't."
Brittany took his hand, "You did-you were somewhere happy."
Kurt allowed her to escort him out,
"Maybe I was."
======================
Kurt felt a little uncomfortable dancing with his new stepbrother/ex-crush but Finn's sentiment had been sweet and thoughtful so he allowed the dance. However, Kurt couldn't help but wish that it been Blaine he'd been dancing with. Kurt thought of inviting Blaine to the wedding but he hadn't really known the other boy that well yet. Maybe one day he'd be able to dance with Blaine.
=====================
After the wedding was over, Burt and Carole stayed at a hotel to get a head start on their honeymoon. Finn was eating a late snack of pizza when Kurt came into the kitchen,
"I wish Lisa hadn't died."
Finn swallowed before answering,
"Who?"
"Lisa-she was my fiancé."
"You're-" Finn looked confused, "dude, aren't you gay?"
"She was my world and after she died," Kurt sat down, "and then Jack came along and I loved him too but," Kurt looked up at him, "I don't think he did. I don't think he loved Gwen either but I'm sure he cared more for her," sniffling Kurt laid his head on the table, "I shouldn't have fallen in love with him."
"You're sleepwalking aren't you?"
Kurt wiped his eyes, "I'm glad I won't see him again." And then Kurt fell asleep. Finn blinked; he thought about leaving Kurt at the table to sleep but he figured the other boy would tear Finn a new one if he didn't help him back into his room. So Finn half carried, half dragged Kurt down into the basement. After putting him to bed, he noticed the new drawing on Kurt's wall. It was that man in the army coat, smiling and winking. The words, "No long your tea-boy" stood out in red. Finn decided not to think about it. Probably just a weird dream his brother had.
==================
The Warbler and New Directions tied at sectionals. Blaine caught up with Kurt in the parking lot,
"So I guess we're going to be competing against each other again."
Kurt smiled, "I guess so."
Blaine laughed, "I thought you guys were incredible."
"You guys were pretty awesome too."
"Hey!"
Both Kurt and Blaine jumped. Rachel came up to them,
"Is he bothering you, Kurt?"
"No Rachel-Blaine here is my friend."
Rachel gasped, "Friend? Kurt you can't be serious!" she pointed at Blaine, "he's the lead singer of the Warblers! How did you meet him anyways?"
"For your information Rachel Berry-Blaine's father is one of my Dad's long-time client's at the garage."
"Oh," Rachel huffed, "Still! He's our competition! Must I remind you of Jesse St. James?"
"Rachel, Blaine is no Jesse St. James," before she could speak again Kurt continued, "he's my friend and he's not out to sabotage us. If you could please leave us...?"
Once Rachel was far enough away, Kurt apologized,
"I'm so, so sorry about that Blaine. Rachel tends to be a little intense when it comes to Glee Club."
"Don't worry about it," Blaine gripped his shoulder, "Wes can sometimes be the same way. I'm used to it. I need to go-how about we meet up for coffee this weekend?"
"I'd love to."
"Alright," Blaine's hand slipped from his shoulder to his hand-almost like a caress, "I'll text you later, ok?"
"Y-yea…"
Back on the bus everybody kept asking him about Blaine. Kurt said nothing and smiled; he was already planning his outfit for the weekend.
=======================
A couple of days before Christmas Blaine came over to his house and asked Kurt to help him with a duet. Kurt was only too happy to help,
"I really can't stay-"
"But baby it's cold outside…"
Through out the song, Blaine kept touching him and leaning close-almost as if he would kiss him. Kurt had never felt more desired.
"Oh, but it's cold outside…."
Before leaving back home Blaine thanked him,
"I don't think the girl I'll be singing with will be half as good as you, Kurt. Thank you for your help."
"I was happy to help."
"Well," Blaine buttoned up his coat and hugged Kurt one last time, "I have to go home now. Have a Merry Christmas, Kurt."
Kurt returned to the hug, "Have a Merry Christmas, Blaine."
For the next three days Kurt drew nothing but Blaine.
=========================
Nobody in Glee was happy with the football team joining. Kurt kept his mouth shut and made sure not to glance at Karofsky. When Sue announced that there would no halftime show Mr. Schue volunteered the Glee club (with the football team) to sing a mash-up of Thriller and Heads will roll. Karofsky, he noticed, was a decent singer and performer. Kurt wasn't at all surprised when some of the football players quit; he was surprised they lasted as long as they did. Kurt joined the team with Lauren, Tina and Mercedes. When one of the opposing members went to for Tina, Kurt tackled them to the ground. When they performed at half-time Kurt was surprised at the enthusiasm of the crowd; although he was more surprised when Karofsky and the other players rejoined. When he got home, Kurt's head was pounding when he went to sleep.
His hands were around a young girl. She kept struggling but he just ignored her, strangled her until she died. After she'd taken her last breath, he walked away a smile on his lips into the rain, looking for a new victim-
Gasping Kurt ran straight into his bathroom, hand over his mouth. Once inside he knelt in front of the toilet and threw up until there was nothing left in his stomach.
He doesn't exist. Tosh, Owen, Gwen and Jack were all in his diary but there was no mention of Adam ANYWHERE. Something was wrong.
Shivering Kurt crawled to his room,
I killed them, Jack! I killed-
No-you are not a murderer, Ianto.
Coughing Kurt grabbed his sketch book and a pen,
-as if he's scared of what he feels for me. I love him…but not the way I love you.
Coming here, it gave me meaning again…You.
A man starts to appear on the paper,
Closing his eyes as Jack kissed his forehead.
After twenty minutes Kurt put down the pen and looked down. A man with red hair and a dark smirk stared back at him. Feeling cold Kurt climbed back into his bed and went back to sleep.
==================================
"I'm in love, Kurt."
"You-you are?"
Blaine looked down at his coffee, a shy smile on his face.
"He's a great guy."
Kurt felt his heart pounding. Ever since he met Blaine, Kurt had a crush on him. In the last couple of months, Kurt had started falling in love with his friend. Blaine was always touching him, seeking him out and singing with him.
Maybe he's fallen for me too!
"So…are you going to be telling this guy soon?"
"Yea," Blaine looked at Kurt excited, "it took a while, but I convinced the Warblers to help me serenade him."
"Really?" Kurt placed his head on his hands, "that sounds very romantic."
"I hope he thinks so too," Blaine sighed, "I can't wait to sing it for him."
Kurt tried not to wiggle in his seat, "I'm sure he'll love it."
============================
On Saturday afternoon Blaine called him,
"It was a DISASTER, Kurt."
"What was?"
Blaine groaned, "You remember how I told you that I was going to serenade the boy of my dreams?"
Kurt's stomach dropped, "Yes?"
"Well I did and-and he rejected me, Kurt."
"Oh," Kurt practically fell on his bed, "I'm-I'm sorry to hear that."
"I made a fool of myself, Kurt. A complete fool," a groan, "Jeremiah told me that just because we got coffee twice didn't mean we were dating," Blaine sighed, "I also got him fired from his job."
"That's…that's too bad. I'm sorry, Blaine."
His friend chuckled, "I guess…I made the whole thing up in my mind. Can you meet me for coffee tomorrow?"
"Yea, I can. I'll see you tomorrow, Blaine."
"Bye Kurt-thanks for listening."
After hanging up, Kurt took out one of his sketchbooks where he had written Blaine's name over and over again. Shaking his head, Kurt threw the sketchbook on the bed.
"Stupid…made the whole thing up in my head again."
That night Kurt dreamed of Blaine and the man in the coat.
===========================
"I've never been so humiliated in my life!"
Blaine stared down at his coffee,
"Honestly, I just wanted to crawl into a hole and die, Kurt."
"That bad huh?"
Sighing Blaine looked up at him,
"Like I said-Jeremiah rejected me AND he got fired," Kurt nodded, "the warblers didn't say anything-well except Wes but," Blaine groaned, "Stupid Valentine's Day."
"You know," Kurt took a sip of his coffee before answering, "I kind of thought when you told me that-that you liked somebody that," Kurt cleared his throat and looked to the side, "that you liked me."
"Liked-oh," Blaine blinked at him, "you thought I liked you."
Kurt couldn't look at his friend; he was too embarrassed. He should have kept his mouth shut.
"Kurt," Blaine grabbed his right hand, "I really, really care about you," Kurt cringed, "you're my best friend and," Blaine shook his head, "I'm not very good at romance-as I just told you-and I…I really don't want to mess up our friendship."
Doing his best to smile Kurt looked at Blaine,
"Alright."
They didn't mention Kurt's confession or Jeremiah after that. When Kurt got home he drew Blaine in the army coat.
==========================
When Rachel invited the entire Glee Club to her party Kurt almost didn't go; but then he thought about inviting Blaine to the party. Kurt was pretty sure that Rachel would let Blaine tag along if he promised that Blaine wouldn't ask anything related to Glee club. Two days before the party Kurt invited Blaine who said yes. Kurt took the entire day to get ready. Burt was a bit suspicious but didn't say anything. At 8:30 Blaine arrived at the Hummel house. Kurt answered the door five seconds after he knocked,
"Hello, Kurt," Blaine hugged him, "ready to go?"
"Yea," Kurt stuck his head back into the house, "FINN! Hurry up!"
"I'm coming, I'm coming!"
A minute later Finn cam lumbering out,
"Come on, come on," Kurt grabbed his step-brother's shoulder, "let's leave before Dad or Carole come out and talk to us," pushing Kurt out the door Kurt yelled into the house, "Bye Dad, Bye Carole! We'll see you later!"
Rachel herself greeted them when they arrived,
"Hello, Kurt!" she hugged him before nodding at Blaine, "Hello Blaine Warbler."
"It's Anderson, actually," Blaine took off his jacket, "I'm not in my school uniform. Not to mention that Kurt already told me not to talk about Glee Club."
Rachel smiled, "Great! Well come on!"
A couple of hours later Kurt was doing everything in his power not to say or do anything stupid to impress Blaine. He didn't drink any alcohol either-he learned his lesson.
"Ok, it's Anderson turn to spin!"
Kurt chuckled a little, excited. He was hoping for the bottle to land on him. Maybe if they kissed, Blaine would start liking Kurt as more than just a friend.
"Here I go!"
The bottle landed on Rachel,
Laughing Rachel leaned forward, eyes bright, "I am going to ROCK your world Blaine Warbler!"
And then Blaine and Rachel kissed. Kurt sat there, frozen.
He didn't mean to spy on them really. He'd just been checking to see if there were more weevils wandering around when he saw them approaching the water tower, laughing. He saw Jack pull Gwen to him, twirling her. Gwen looked like she was laughing. After a couple of seconds Jack set her back down before kissing her and-
"Ok!" Kurt chuckled as Blaine and Rachel separated, "I think that's enough."
"Damn," someone said, "that was some kiss."
Kurt grit his teeth but said nothing. He said nothing when Rachel and Blaine sang "Don't you want me". At a quarter to 1am, Finn and Kurt dragged a drunk Blaine back to the navigator.
"Oh man, Kurt he is WASTED."
"Really? I didn't notice."
Finn grimaced from the passenger seat, "Doesn't he live like, an hour away or something? What are we going to do?"
"Well obviously, we can't let him drive home, can we?"
Sneaking into the house with a drunken Blaine was tricky but they somehow managed it. As soon as Finn dumped Blaine on Kurt's bed he left for his room, exhausted. Tired and depressed Kurt decided to skip his daily moisturizing routine. Instead he situated Blaine on his bed and made up the couch to sleep on it. Kurt fell asleep with the image of Blaine kissing Rachel in his head.
Something woke Blaine up. Grunting he wiped his eyes and looked around.
"Where am I?"
Trying to sit up Blaine looked around the room. After a couple of minutes, he realized he was in Kurt's room.
"Wha?"
Near the door, Kurt was holding a flashlight and looking at something.
"Kurt?" Blaine said, "what 'm doing 'ere?"
His friend looked at him,
"It was the last time I saw you."
"Me?"
Kurt stood up,
"Something was happening and I was going to call you. I used the CCTV to look for you and," Kurt snarled, "I found you with her-with GWEN."
Blaine was pretty sure he was either hallucinating, or asleep, "Wha?"
"I saw you kiss her again, Jack," Kurt's face crumbled, "the last time I saw you before I died and you were kissing Gwen Cooper."
Now Blaine was really confused, "Jack? Who-"
Before he could say anything more, Kurt yawned and crawled back into his sleeping bag. Blaine looked at him for a second before laying back down and going back to sleep. In the morning, Blaine didn't remember what Kurt said.
==========================
"Of course I'll go out with you, Rachel."
Kurt could feel himself stiffen. He waited until Blaine closed his cell phone to speak,
"Blaine I don't think you should be leading Rachel on. It's not nice."
"Leading her on?" Blaine took a sip of his coffee, "I'm not leading her on," he smiled, "that kiss we shared felt great, Kurt."
"You-"Kurt laughed, "you're joking, right?"
"No, no," Blaine sighed, "Kurt I've got a confession to make. I've never actually been anyone's boyfriend so I don't-I guess I don't really know if I'm gay, you know?"
Jack flirting with the waitress, Jack checking out a random girl on the street, Jack flirting, touching, KISSING Gwen
"You…you think your bisexual?"
Blaine glared, "Maybe I am."
Lisa, beautiful Lisa who would fall apart under his hands, under his mouth-
"Ok," Kurt breathed in deeply, "I just-I thought you KNEW you were Gay. I mean," he chuckled, "I've never had a boyfriend either but I'm pretty sure I'm 100% Gay, Blaine."
"You don't believe me, do you?"
"Blaine," Kurt leaned back, "you and Rachel were drunk. Maybe-maybe that's why the kiss-"
"I don't believe you."
Blaine stood up, "I thought you would support me in this, Kurt."
Eye's wide Kurt looked up at his friend, "Blaine-"
"I'd say "bye" but I wouldn't want to offend you."
With that said Blaine stormed out of the coffee shop, leaving Kurt alone. Shocked Kurt stayed a few more minutes before going home. When Rachel called to ask for help in cleaning her basement Kurt told her he was sick and hung up.
==========================
"Rachel please-"Kurt grabbed her hand, "Don't kiss him."
"Why not?"
"Rachel you KNOW I like him. And…honestly if you kiss him it's going to end up badly for one of us and-I don't want you to get hurt and I don't want to get hurt-"
"Who cares about you buddy? By the end of the day, I could have a boyfriend!"
No you don't-no you don't Jack! You think it's cold and lonely out there but it isn't for me because I have him!
Kurt watched as Rachel kissed Blaine,
He loves me!
Blaine smiled at her,
You really think you can go back to your life before Torchwood?
I wouldn't know anything different
I would
Feeling sick Kurt rushed out of the café and climbed into his car. During the ride Kurt felt like he was going to throw up but he held it in. When he got home Kurt rushed into the hallway bathroom and threw up.
"Kurt?"
Someone knocked on the door,
"Honey are you ok?"
Spitting into the toilet Kurt sat down,
"Just," Kurt shivered, "I'm fine Carole."
"Are you sure?"
Wiping at the tears crawling down his cheeks Kurt answered,
"I'm sure-just-just gonna freshen up and then go to lie down."
A pause, "Ok, Kurt. Tell me if you need anything, ok?"
Kurt waited until Carole went away before coming out and rushing to his room. Breathing in Kurt pulled out his pencils and sketchbook and started drawing.
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Blaine had been calling Kurt ever since he rushed out of the café but his friend had yet to answer. After two hours Blaine was so worried he decided to pay Kurt a visit to his house. He rang the doorbell and stood back, waiting. Within seconds, the door opened,
"Can I help you?"
"Hi Mrs. Hummel-My name is Blaine and I'm Kurt's friend; can I please see him?"
"Blaine, so nice to meet you," Carole shook his hand, "I'm afraid Kurt isn't feeling that well."
"Is he ok?"
"I think so," Carole frowned, "he locked himself in his room and he hasn't come back out."
Now Blaine was REALLY worried.
"Can I please come in and try and talk to him? Please?"
"If you want to," Carole opened the door further, "come in. Kurt's room is downstairs."
"Thank you, Mrs. Hummel."
Blaine climbed down the stairs and knocked. He waited for 20 seconds before knocking again. Before he could knock for the third time he heard a thud and the sound of chocking.
"Kurt?"
Opening the door Blaine saw Kurt stumble into the bathroom before locking it. Blaine cringed when he heard the sounds of vomiting. Chewing on his lip Blaine went to sit on the bed when something caught his eye. There was a comic pinned to the wall. Blaine looked at the bathroom door before moving towards the paper.
The first page showed a woman with pale skin and green eyes scowling. The words on the bottom said,
No you don't-no you don't Jack! You think it's cold and lonely out there but it isn't for me because I have him!
Blaine moved to the next drawing. This time it was the portrait of a handsome man with blue eyes with the words,
You really think you can go back to your life before Torchwood?
Frowning Blaine moved on to the last drawing that had both the man and woman with the last part of the conversation on top,
I wouldn't know anything different
I would
"Blaine?" Kurt came out of the bathroom, shaking, "what are you doing here?"
"Kurt!" Blaine went to hug him but Kurt moved to the side.
"Ugh Blaine I'm all gross right now."
Groaning Kurt fell on his bed, curling up. Blaine cleared his throat,
"I didn't know you could draw."
Kurt shrugged, "I've always drawn."
"They're pretty good. Who are they?"
His friend sighed, "I don't know."
"Did-did you make them up?"
"No," Kurt turned towards him, "they're real," his eyes went dark, "they hurt me.
Blaine went to Kurt, "Hurt you? What did they do?" he rubbed circles on Kurt's back, "Kurt?"
Sniffling Kurt looked up, "They just did," sighing Kurt stood up, "never mind that though," Kurt took one of Blaine's hand, "I wanted to-to apologize about not being supportive of you and Rachel."
Kurt smiled at him, "I mean-if you really like here then-"
"Actually," Blaine scratched his head, "I-you were right, Kurt. When Rachel kissed me today," he didn't noticed Kurt's flinch, "I didn't feel anything so I'm sorry for attacking you."
Nodding Kurt laughed, "Friends?"
"Yea-friends."
Blaine forgot all about the drawings.
Link to Chapter 5B