Happy fuckin' New Year
Thats right kids. Its 5770 by the Hebrew calender! Yom Kippur's over. And it is the return of the ever popular abscess tag. For those of you not familiar. Click it! See what crazy medically resistant staph goodies lay inside! *sighs* Fucking fuck yall. Four years ago today(by the Hebrew Calender) I was on my way to the ER with my first EVER abscess, which now makes its memory felt in the form of a charming two centimeter in diameter scar on the side of my right breast.
And here we are, four years later, fucking right were we started - me with an abscess and trying to figure out the right course of medical action. How many of you were here then? Show of hands? *sighs* I am SO fucking tired of this. That shouldn't be one of my biggest tags damnit.
I'm going to have to drop a class. CLEARLY I can't deal with a measly 12 hour class load. I have to go back to 9. Fucking fucking FUCK. I'm ill but mostly I'm angry. I'm so angry. I'm angry at my body. I'm angry at myself for any thing I could've done differently(and before you placate me, there are almost certainly things I could've done). I'm angry that after four years of this noise, I'm still on the fucking ride. Thats life with a chronic illness for you I guess. Live with it, rather than defeat it. But to be honest, it scares me. It keeps me up until 6am because for some reason, I'm less scared that I'm going to get sick and DIE when the sun is up.
*waves a hand* anyway. That's my drama. Services were fine. I got to see my sister. We broke the fast with a lovely family.
I'm just so sick of this. I hate Tallahassee and I hate FSU and I hate all the bullshit I cant seem to escape whenever I come back here. ofangoriousone and mondegreen are pretty much the silver lining in my fucking storm cloud. I love you two so much, you dont even know. You know we've only been here at school and friends for a month? I feel like I've known both of you my whole life. *hugs*
Anyway. Rambley. That's me. Ramble-tron.
I picked the Superhero AU over at bandom_au to make up for that fact that the class I'm probably going to drop is my writing seminar. I know maryangel200 is gonna want me to go Gerard/Frank but I'm seriously feeling Gerard/Brian lately(sorry bb). Disappear-verse cracked 23,000 words and its my epic Gerard/Frank story. I dont know that I can juggle much more of that pairing until I get done with their story over there. It's just too complicated and when I write the two of them, its THAT version of them and that is not the version of them that would be called for in a supers AU. While Superpowered!Gerard/normal guy!Brian is like...strangely appealing to me. Ah the complications. To quote Mallrats "I guarantee he blows a load like a shotgun right through [her] back."
Yeah, I deal with my personal pain with fandom. Better than eating my pain or taking drugs right? Anyway, suggestions for who should have what power? And before you say it - Batman is not the direction I'm heading. Yes, he's awesome and he's a hero but he has no super power besides his billions and that doesnt count. I'm talking mutation, radioactive animal bite, alien in our yellow sun type shit.
And here we are, four years later, fucking right were we started - me with an abscess and trying to figure out the right course of medical action. How many of you were here then? Show of hands? *sighs* I am SO fucking tired of this. That shouldn't be one of my biggest tags damnit.
I'm going to have to drop a class. CLEARLY I can't deal with a measly 12 hour class load. I have to go back to 9. Fucking fucking FUCK. I'm ill but mostly I'm angry. I'm so angry. I'm angry at my body. I'm angry at myself for any thing I could've done differently(and before you placate me, there are almost certainly things I could've done). I'm angry that after four years of this noise, I'm still on the fucking ride. Thats life with a chronic illness for you I guess. Live with it, rather than defeat it. But to be honest, it scares me. It keeps me up until 6am because for some reason, I'm less scared that I'm going to get sick and DIE when the sun is up.
*waves a hand* anyway. That's my drama. Services were fine. I got to see my sister. We broke the fast with a lovely family.
I'm just so sick of this. I hate Tallahassee and I hate FSU and I hate all the bullshit I cant seem to escape whenever I come back here. ofangoriousone and mondegreen are pretty much the silver lining in my fucking storm cloud. I love you two so much, you dont even know. You know we've only been here at school and friends for a month? I feel like I've known both of you my whole life. *hugs*
Anyway. Rambley. That's me. Ramble-tron.
I picked the Superhero AU over at bandom_au to make up for that fact that the class I'm probably going to drop is my writing seminar. I know maryangel200 is gonna want me to go Gerard/Frank but I'm seriously feeling Gerard/Brian lately(sorry bb). Disappear-verse cracked 23,000 words and its my epic Gerard/Frank story. I dont know that I can juggle much more of that pairing until I get done with their story over there. It's just too complicated and when I write the two of them, its THAT version of them and that is not the version of them that would be called for in a supers AU. While Superpowered!Gerard/normal guy!Brian is like...strangely appealing to me. Ah the complications. To quote Mallrats "I guarantee he blows a load like a shotgun right through [her] back."
Yeah, I deal with my personal pain with fandom. Better than eating my pain or taking drugs right? Anyway, suggestions for who should have what power? And before you say it - Batman is not the direction I'm heading. Yes, he's awesome and he's a hero but he has no super power besides his billions and that doesnt count. I'm talking mutation, radioactive animal bite, alien in our yellow sun type shit.