Adventures in public transit, part XVI
How to have an interesting morning commute in 11 easy steps:
1. Operating on early-morning-hours autopilot, forget that BART never runs on time and get onto the Daly City BART train that pulls into the station at about the time the SFO/Millbrae train--your train--normally does.
2. Immerse self in book. Miss all announcements of train destination.
3. Be pulled out of book by funky smell of someone getting into the seat behind you.
4. Hear a flowing liquid noise that, based on your extensive experience of seeing and hearing gross things in the urban setting, can only mean that the dude behind you is PEEING ONTO THE WALL AND FLOOR OF THE BART CAR.
5. Realize that the train is almost empty and that said dude has specifically elected to SIT RIGHT BEHIND YOU WHILE PEEING.
6. Hurriedly relocate to seat on far side of car. Wonder why you are a freak magnet. Re-immerse self in book.
7. Realize that the train has come to a halt in the middle of the tracks and has not moved for a couple of minutes.
8. Realize that in your eagerness to not think about the happenings on BART, you have missed the announcement that the train was going out of service at Daly City.
9. Realize that you are stuck in an out-of-service train with a guy who just peed on the seat behind you, and who is STARING AT YOU INTENTLY.
10. Make way to front of train, where conductor helpfully tells you he's pulling back into Daly City and you can catch the Millbrae train from there.
11. Renew fierce loathing for BART, which is dirty and expensive and never runs on time, despite the fact that most of this situation--except for Peeing Guy--was entirely your own fault.
* * * * *
It's time to move on to Stargate, where--say what you will about the show--nobody ever pees on trains while sitting behind horrified technical writers.
6.06 - "Abyss"
* So is this Jack remembering the symbiote's last mission? Or is this present time? Because once the symbiote healed him, I have a hard time picturing him going on Tok'ra missions.
* That's more like it. Jack didn't leave the Tok'ra base on his own.
* Oh, General Hammond. You totally leave people behind.
* Hey, it's Baal! Oh dear, and he's going to torture Jack for information he doesn't have.
* The Tok'ra are being their usual helpful selves when it comes to aiding in a rescue.
* Daniel! And who knew--apparently snark transcends death. But we once again hit up against the issue that ascended beings can't interfere.
* I love the way General Hammond is playing hardball to get the Tok'ra to cough up those reports.
* I suspect that Jack is not a good candidate for ascension. And I don't think he wants it at all.
* Speaking of ascension, it looks like it's better than Lasik! Daniel's not wearing glasses in the afterlife.
* Is it wrong to notice that Baal's kind of hot while he's torturing Jack? I'm a bad person.
* I like it when the writers have Teal'c strategize against the goa'uld. He knows what he's talking about.
* Aw. Daniel tells Jack to hold on, and he does until Sam and Jonas and Teal'c can rescue him. That's... still pretty useless.
6.07 - "Shadow Play"
* Jack sure does know how to hold a grudge. He was very angry with the Kelownans for trying to blame Daniel for the accident that killed him.
* More nice Teal'c/Jonas bonding. They're both traitors to their people, but Teal'c has a cause and a certainty that Jonas doesn't.
* It's Dean Stockwell! I really am going to see every actor who ever appeared on television in the 80s and 90s if I watch Stargate for long enough.
* Trying to trade naquadria for military technology? Yeah, Earth shouldn't interfere in this planet's rivalries, but they want that naquadria.
* Underground peace network? Dean Stockwell's story seems fishy.
* Why is SG-1 (led by Jack "Mr. Diplomacy" O'Neill) once again sent to negotiate with people--especially people who Jack "Mr. Diplomacy" O'Neill doesn't like?
* You know, I'd buy that Jonas had conflicted loyalties here if he'd ever faced special hardship over his choice, or been anything other than enthusiastic about his new life, or shown any signs of missing the old one. But in fast-tracking him into SG-1, the writers didn't do that, so this doesn't work at all.
* Ironies abound. The Kelownans want military tech, which is what SG-1 has been trying to get from alien civilizations for years (just ask the Tollans). And the Kelownans are right--SG-1 can't lecture them about making their gate public when the American government has no intention of doing that very thing.
* SGC isn't going to participate in a coup on another planet, even for naquadria. I hope.
* Especially since Dean Stockwell is schizophrenic. I assume there's not really a resistance?
* Long-term exposure to naquadria causes brain damage and schizophrenia? That's not good. And neither are the Kelownans, since they don't care as long as the research gets done.
* Huh. This episode actually pokes at the issue of guilt over helping to develop a weapon of mass destruction.
6.08 - "The Other Guys"
* Hm. Felger's hero worship of SG-1 is severely misplaced.
* Hee! Teal'c is totally keeping track of how many times they've saved the world.
* D'oh. SG-1 is captured, and it's nerds to the rescue. Unfortunately for Felger and Coombs, they don't know that they leave men behind all the time. All. The. Time. Just ask those poor slobs getting sucked into the black hole. Or Jack in "The Fifth Man." Or Vala.
* Heh. Jack and Sam and Teal'c totally have the captured-by-a-goa'uld routine down. And that's even before it's revealed that they're on a mission to meet an undercover Tok'ra and let themselves get caught.
* Uh oh. The first prime is onto them.
* Even worse--Felger has an idea. Those Jaffa disguises? Should not fool anybody who has eyes.
* Since when does Jack care about grammar? Seriously?
* It would be awesome if Felger got poor Coombs killed through his insane fancifulness, but I suspect that Stargate doesn't play it that dark.
* That this was all Felger's imagination makes this episode retroactively much more enjoyable.
* * * * *
I am so ready for this week to end. But I'm going out for sushi tonight with some girlfriends to do a little more late birthday celebrating, so that should be fun. And tomorrow morning, maybe I'll be able to get myself on the right freaking train.
1. Operating on early-morning-hours autopilot, forget that BART never runs on time and get onto the Daly City BART train that pulls into the station at about the time the SFO/Millbrae train--your train--normally does.
2. Immerse self in book. Miss all announcements of train destination.
3. Be pulled out of book by funky smell of someone getting into the seat behind you.
4. Hear a flowing liquid noise that, based on your extensive experience of seeing and hearing gross things in the urban setting, can only mean that the dude behind you is PEEING ONTO THE WALL AND FLOOR OF THE BART CAR.
5. Realize that the train is almost empty and that said dude has specifically elected to SIT RIGHT BEHIND YOU WHILE PEEING.
6. Hurriedly relocate to seat on far side of car. Wonder why you are a freak magnet. Re-immerse self in book.
7. Realize that the train has come to a halt in the middle of the tracks and has not moved for a couple of minutes.
8. Realize that in your eagerness to not think about the happenings on BART, you have missed the announcement that the train was going out of service at Daly City.
9. Realize that you are stuck in an out-of-service train with a guy who just peed on the seat behind you, and who is STARING AT YOU INTENTLY.
10. Make way to front of train, where conductor helpfully tells you he's pulling back into Daly City and you can catch the Millbrae train from there.
11. Renew fierce loathing for BART, which is dirty and expensive and never runs on time, despite the fact that most of this situation--except for Peeing Guy--was entirely your own fault.
* * * * *
It's time to move on to Stargate, where--say what you will about the show--nobody ever pees on trains while sitting behind horrified technical writers.
6.06 - "Abyss"
* So is this Jack remembering the symbiote's last mission? Or is this present time? Because once the symbiote healed him, I have a hard time picturing him going on Tok'ra missions.
* That's more like it. Jack didn't leave the Tok'ra base on his own.
* Oh, General Hammond. You totally leave people behind.
* Hey, it's Baal! Oh dear, and he's going to torture Jack for information he doesn't have.
* The Tok'ra are being their usual helpful selves when it comes to aiding in a rescue.
* Daniel! And who knew--apparently snark transcends death. But we once again hit up against the issue that ascended beings can't interfere.
* I love the way General Hammond is playing hardball to get the Tok'ra to cough up those reports.
* I suspect that Jack is not a good candidate for ascension. And I don't think he wants it at all.
* Speaking of ascension, it looks like it's better than Lasik! Daniel's not wearing glasses in the afterlife.
* Is it wrong to notice that Baal's kind of hot while he's torturing Jack? I'm a bad person.
* I like it when the writers have Teal'c strategize against the goa'uld. He knows what he's talking about.
* Aw. Daniel tells Jack to hold on, and he does until Sam and Jonas and Teal'c can rescue him. That's... still pretty useless.
6.07 - "Shadow Play"
* Jack sure does know how to hold a grudge. He was very angry with the Kelownans for trying to blame Daniel for the accident that killed him.
* More nice Teal'c/Jonas bonding. They're both traitors to their people, but Teal'c has a cause and a certainty that Jonas doesn't.
* It's Dean Stockwell! I really am going to see every actor who ever appeared on television in the 80s and 90s if I watch Stargate for long enough.
* Trying to trade naquadria for military technology? Yeah, Earth shouldn't interfere in this planet's rivalries, but they want that naquadria.
* Underground peace network? Dean Stockwell's story seems fishy.
* Why is SG-1 (led by Jack "Mr. Diplomacy" O'Neill) once again sent to negotiate with people--especially people who Jack "Mr. Diplomacy" O'Neill doesn't like?
* You know, I'd buy that Jonas had conflicted loyalties here if he'd ever faced special hardship over his choice, or been anything other than enthusiastic about his new life, or shown any signs of missing the old one. But in fast-tracking him into SG-1, the writers didn't do that, so this doesn't work at all.
* Ironies abound. The Kelownans want military tech, which is what SG-1 has been trying to get from alien civilizations for years (just ask the Tollans). And the Kelownans are right--SG-1 can't lecture them about making their gate public when the American government has no intention of doing that very thing.
* SGC isn't going to participate in a coup on another planet, even for naquadria. I hope.
* Especially since Dean Stockwell is schizophrenic. I assume there's not really a resistance?
* Long-term exposure to naquadria causes brain damage and schizophrenia? That's not good. And neither are the Kelownans, since they don't care as long as the research gets done.
* Huh. This episode actually pokes at the issue of guilt over helping to develop a weapon of mass destruction.
6.08 - "The Other Guys"
* Hm. Felger's hero worship of SG-1 is severely misplaced.
* Hee! Teal'c is totally keeping track of how many times they've saved the world.
* D'oh. SG-1 is captured, and it's nerds to the rescue. Unfortunately for Felger and Coombs, they don't know that they leave men behind all the time. All. The. Time. Just ask those poor slobs getting sucked into the black hole. Or Jack in "The Fifth Man." Or Vala.
* Heh. Jack and Sam and Teal'c totally have the captured-by-a-goa'uld routine down. And that's even before it's revealed that they're on a mission to meet an undercover Tok'ra and let themselves get caught.
* Uh oh. The first prime is onto them.
* Even worse--Felger has an idea. Those Jaffa disguises? Should not fool anybody who has eyes.
* Since when does Jack care about grammar? Seriously?
* It would be awesome if Felger got poor Coombs killed through his insane fancifulness, but I suspect that Stargate doesn't play it that dark.
* That this was all Felger's imagination makes this episode retroactively much more enjoyable.
* * * * *
I am so ready for this week to end. But I'm going out for sushi tonight with some girlfriends to do a little more late birthday celebrating, so that should be fun. And tomorrow morning, maybe I'll be able to get myself on the right freaking train.