Are You Serious? and A Wish for Summer Vacation
Oh how I've missed you, LJ!
ARE YOU SERIOUS?!
I received a link to an amazon item review today. Before I read it I could hear outrageous laughter coming from the teacher 2 doors down. She had received the same link. The item reviewed:
The link and first review: http://www.amazon.com/Three-T-Shirt-Available-Various-Sizes/dp/B000NZW3IY/ref=cm_cr_pr_product_top
Most Helpful Customer Reviews
This item has wolves on it which makes it intrinsically sweet and worth 5 stars by itself, but once I tried it on, that's when the magic happened. After checking to ensure that the shirt would properly cover my girth, I walked from my trailer to Wal-mart with the shirt on and was immediately approached by women. The women knew from the wolves on my shirt that I, like a wolf, am a mysterious loner who knows how to 'howl at the moon' from time to time (if you catch my drift!). The women that approached me wanted to know if I would be their boyfriend and/or give them money for something they called mehth. I told them no, because they didn't have enough teeth, and frankly a man with a wolf-shirt shouldn't settle for the first thing that comes to him.
I arrived at Wal-mart, mounted my courtesy-scooter (walking is such a drag!) sitting side saddle so that my wolves would show. While I was browsing tube socks, I could hear aroused asthmatic breathing behind me. I turned around to see a slightly sweaty dream in sweatpants and flip-flops standing there. She told me she liked the wolves on my shirt, I told her I wanted to howl at her moon. She offered me a swig from her mountain dew, and I drove my scooter, with her shuffling along side out the door and into the rest of our lives. Thank you wolf shirt.
Pros: Fits my girthy frame, has wolves on it, attracts women
Cons: Only 3 wolves (could probably use a few more on the 'guns'), cannot see wolves when sitting with arms crossed, wolves would have been better if they glowed in the dark.
Best. Review. Of. Anything. Ever.
IS IT SUMMER YET?
The end of the school year is kicking my butt. Between trying to keep the students calm (hormonal 5th graders anyone?), a sudden crapload of paperwork and various sundry of other, well, crap I can honestly say I barely know my own name. However, I am managing to amuse my colleagues with an EPIC picspam of our staff sailing on "The Love Boat". Unfortunately most of the staff is fairly young and explaining Charo takes the funny down a notch. Meh, I'm amusing myself. I guess that's all that matters.