Part 2, a little more chipper
So, as promised, here is part 2. Unfortunately, I am not in the same infuriated mood as I was the other night, so im not sure if I can write with such passion or free thought persay as I have in the past. Its somewhat of an expected post, and skewed at the fact that as of this current point and time, Mike is ranting to me about his very fake roomate and his lack there of grasp on reality towards the world in regards to his girlfriend. Actually somewhat humorous and putting a smile on my face. Thanks Mike.
So, yesterday, I got into what can be considered my first accident. I basically rear-ended someone at about 7 mph. It doesnt sound that horrible, but I was accelerating (it was at that miserable merge going from summerhill onto cranbury) trying to merge into traffic, and I thought the lady in front of me had already gone. Well, apparently not. So I got out and made sure she was ok, and she was. And like 10 min later, after I made sure her child in the backseat was allright, she goes and tells her son Billy to calm down, looks at me and says, he doesnt know whats going on...hes only 7, and he has disabilities...and im thinkin to myself...what kind of disabilities? I was fine up until that point. After she said that, my mind and body went numb. Thanks a lot you fucking cunt...as if I didnt feel shitty enough for fucking hitting you in the first place, you go and pull that guilt trip on me...Needless to say I AM the worst person in the world, and dont understand my own fau paux, and because of this incident am going directly to hell. No after life nirvana filled with the big tittied woman who are plentiful with the fornication. No tranquility among myself. And more importantly, a life condemned to an interminable and veritable depiction of torture...Nah, fuck that, shit happens.
It was rough though, seeing as I have never been in that type of situation before, and ya know what; a police report was so not necessary. Your goddamn deductible wont even meet the requirments. All that copious paperwork for what?? More frustration? I guess we'll just have to wait and watch this situation unfurl. Should be somewhat amusing and nauseating at the same time. The other thing that made me mad: DONT try and make small talk with me you idiot! I fucked up, I know! I felt like the awkwardness was raping me every time I had to squeak out a statement just to satiate her inability to let me sit there and reflect on my errors. Stop making me purge information I dont want to share with you. I dont care who your fucking babysitter is, or who your neighbor is, or even how many times youve seen accidents happen at that intersection, JUST GO AWAY! I amazes me to see peoples (including myself) inability to be independent. You sometimes dont need to say anything to show how you are feeling...this was one of those times.
Needless to say, it was what I consider the ultimate ending to the ultimate bad week. I broke down and cried for a good 15-20 min. However, I did it in a respectable place. My car. The only real means of disassociating myself from society. My parents suggested I stay home, but I needed to get out, couldnt sit around and think about it (is that running away from my problems?).
Im really glad I went out. Me, Mark, and Bruno (and his friends from Stockton) went to see From Autumn to Ashes last night. It was amazing. I found Death Metal Dan there, and it was just so much fun. I got into a fight with someone last night, and gave him a bloody nose, and got a nice bruise on my arm from it, but eh, was worth it. I most certainly got my frustrations about a lot of things out by going last night. Most fun ive had in a while. Came home, talked to Jenna for about 20 min. (in which the situation is very shaky and very questionable, as has its always been) and then so serenly went to bed, all bruised up and sore, but content none the less. Best sleep ive had in quite some time.
I know how to appease my anxiety now. I know how to make things better, and how to resolve my conflicting viewpoints, and how to talk to people...Its called growing up.
P.S.- Allie, you apparently no longer need a code to have a journal...not too sure what the deal with that one is, but jump on it yo!
BethStardust: it's the king of dance dance !
SlAkErBoY1: haha
BethStardust: i guess it's better than being a burger king .
SlAkErBoY1: ...but i dont get to wear an amusing little crown...how saddening
BethStardust: Wow... that is saddening.
BethStardust: You'll have to fix that.
SlAkErBoY1: wen i change the world, i will
BethStardust: oooh..that's why you were pissed off about your english class.
BethStardust: you had high aspirations of wearing a cardboard crown
SlAkErBoY1: ...damn, you got me
So, yesterday, I got into what can be considered my first accident. I basically rear-ended someone at about 7 mph. It doesnt sound that horrible, but I was accelerating (it was at that miserable merge going from summerhill onto cranbury) trying to merge into traffic, and I thought the lady in front of me had already gone. Well, apparently not. So I got out and made sure she was ok, and she was. And like 10 min later, after I made sure her child in the backseat was allright, she goes and tells her son Billy to calm down, looks at me and says, he doesnt know whats going on...hes only 7, and he has disabilities...and im thinkin to myself...what kind of disabilities? I was fine up until that point. After she said that, my mind and body went numb. Thanks a lot you fucking cunt...as if I didnt feel shitty enough for fucking hitting you in the first place, you go and pull that guilt trip on me...Needless to say I AM the worst person in the world, and dont understand my own fau paux, and because of this incident am going directly to hell. No after life nirvana filled with the big tittied woman who are plentiful with the fornication. No tranquility among myself. And more importantly, a life condemned to an interminable and veritable depiction of torture...Nah, fuck that, shit happens.
It was rough though, seeing as I have never been in that type of situation before, and ya know what; a police report was so not necessary. Your goddamn deductible wont even meet the requirments. All that copious paperwork for what?? More frustration? I guess we'll just have to wait and watch this situation unfurl. Should be somewhat amusing and nauseating at the same time. The other thing that made me mad: DONT try and make small talk with me you idiot! I fucked up, I know! I felt like the awkwardness was raping me every time I had to squeak out a statement just to satiate her inability to let me sit there and reflect on my errors. Stop making me purge information I dont want to share with you. I dont care who your fucking babysitter is, or who your neighbor is, or even how many times youve seen accidents happen at that intersection, JUST GO AWAY! I amazes me to see peoples (including myself) inability to be independent. You sometimes dont need to say anything to show how you are feeling...this was one of those times.
Needless to say, it was what I consider the ultimate ending to the ultimate bad week. I broke down and cried for a good 15-20 min. However, I did it in a respectable place. My car. The only real means of disassociating myself from society. My parents suggested I stay home, but I needed to get out, couldnt sit around and think about it (is that running away from my problems?).
Im really glad I went out. Me, Mark, and Bruno (and his friends from Stockton) went to see From Autumn to Ashes last night. It was amazing. I found Death Metal Dan there, and it was just so much fun. I got into a fight with someone last night, and gave him a bloody nose, and got a nice bruise on my arm from it, but eh, was worth it. I most certainly got my frustrations about a lot of things out by going last night. Most fun ive had in a while. Came home, talked to Jenna for about 20 min. (in which the situation is very shaky and very questionable, as has its always been) and then so serenly went to bed, all bruised up and sore, but content none the less. Best sleep ive had in quite some time.
I know how to appease my anxiety now. I know how to make things better, and how to resolve my conflicting viewpoints, and how to talk to people...Its called growing up.
P.S.- Allie, you apparently no longer need a code to have a journal...not too sure what the deal with that one is, but jump on it yo!
BethStardust: it's the king of dance dance !
SlAkErBoY1: haha
BethStardust: i guess it's better than being a burger king .
SlAkErBoY1: ...but i dont get to wear an amusing little crown...how saddening
BethStardust: Wow... that is saddening.
BethStardust: You'll have to fix that.
SlAkErBoY1: wen i change the world, i will
BethStardust: oooh..that's why you were pissed off about your english class.
BethStardust: you had high aspirations of wearing a cardboard crown
SlAkErBoY1: ...damn, you got me