(no subject)
milena says 'oh, we are so young!' why do i feel so old? like i'm running out of time? tick tick tick went my watch in my ear and i laid awake all morning, after the 6am return, with chemicals in my head and no desire to sleep.
when you get off the train at boddinstraße, sick, fatigued, wanting whatever it is that you took during the night to finally wear off so you can come down and sleep already, look up- from the bottom of the stairs all you can see is two light posts standing up like sentinels or beacons, a drizzle coming down and the gray blue morning sky. you wonder to yourself if you might be dreaming, well the night was certainly strange enough, or maybe finally the bit of earth holding the station had come up by it's own will and released itself from the gravity of the planet, maybe you're floating with it and when you reach the top of the stairs the wind will carry you away and you'll be swept into that gray blue nothing with not more than a whisper; or else you've become unhinged, you feel disoriented, and as you finally walk up the stone stairs your heart quickens and you are half surprised to see the buildings leading down hermannstraße to the platz appear slowly from the top down. the green albans wetten sign and the pastel hues. though you've seen them a hundred times, they're still unfamiliar in that moment. turn toward home and sleep it off.
when you get off the train at boddinstraße, sick, fatigued, wanting whatever it is that you took during the night to finally wear off so you can come down and sleep already, look up- from the bottom of the stairs all you can see is two light posts standing up like sentinels or beacons, a drizzle coming down and the gray blue morning sky. you wonder to yourself if you might be dreaming, well the night was certainly strange enough, or maybe finally the bit of earth holding the station had come up by it's own will and released itself from the gravity of the planet, maybe you're floating with it and when you reach the top of the stairs the wind will carry you away and you'll be swept into that gray blue nothing with not more than a whisper; or else you've become unhinged, you feel disoriented, and as you finally walk up the stone stairs your heart quickens and you are half surprised to see the buildings leading down hermannstraße to the platz appear slowly from the top down. the green albans wetten sign and the pastel hues. though you've seen them a hundred times, they're still unfamiliar in that moment. turn toward home and sleep it off.