(no subject)
Meh.
I am lonely and I feel like I have no friends in Beijing. I have people I know, but since Roommate and I are...not on the outs, per se, but we only communicate through gchat, even when we're in the same house, I no longer even have anyone to text if I have a funny thought or want to go out and get dinner. I e-mail Lorien and Lauren, I post on people's Facebook walls, I occasionally gchat with Kyle and Matt, I maintain one-sided conversations with intarweb people who I fear actually can't stand me, and all week I count the days until it's socially acceptable for me to Skype with my mom again. Friendly Toothless Man down the street and I share our same hello-are-you-cold exchange every day, and the waiters at my favorite Uighur restaurant yell HELLO at me and I tell them I want gaifan. This is the extent of my social interaction. I relish solitude, but even for me, this is lonely.
Tomorrow's Valentine's Day? I don't get all emo anymore about it anymore, but even so, at 22, this whole 'never-had-a-serious-boyfriend' thing is wearing out its welcome. I need some lovin' and some sexin' and a friend. I'm such a loner and so awkward in one-on-one situations that the thought of being in a ~relationship~ is both thrilling and nervewracking.
But honestly, I think trying to meet people and make friends is actually harder than trying to meet people to bone them. The rules and the 'game' or whathaveyou are less defined.
I really want a kitty.
On a positive note: this guy's painting oeuvre seems to be 70% flying whales, and I appreciate that.
I am lonely and I feel like I have no friends in Beijing. I have people I know, but since Roommate and I are...not on the outs, per se, but we only communicate through gchat, even when we're in the same house, I no longer even have anyone to text if I have a funny thought or want to go out and get dinner. I e-mail Lorien and Lauren, I post on people's Facebook walls, I occasionally gchat with Kyle and Matt, I maintain one-sided conversations with intarweb people who I fear actually can't stand me, and all week I count the days until it's socially acceptable for me to Skype with my mom again. Friendly Toothless Man down the street and I share our same hello-are-you-cold exchange every day, and the waiters at my favorite Uighur restaurant yell HELLO at me and I tell them I want gaifan. This is the extent of my social interaction. I relish solitude, but even for me, this is lonely.
Tomorrow's Valentine's Day? I don't get all emo anymore about it anymore, but even so, at 22, this whole 'never-had-a-serious-boyfriend' thing is wearing out its welcome. I need some lovin' and some sexin' and a friend. I'm such a loner and so awkward in one-on-one situations that the thought of being in a ~relationship~ is both thrilling and nervewracking.
But honestly, I think trying to meet people and make friends is actually harder than trying to meet people to bone them. The rules and the 'game' or whathaveyou are less defined.
I really want a kitty.
On a positive note: this guy's painting oeuvre seems to be 70% flying whales, and I appreciate that.