Day 47: Breakfast

[thatdamnedninja]

It had all been going so well

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[petalwitch]

Aerith didn't even flinch when the orange juice splattered up and onto her own pants. She supposed, somewhere deep inside where logic still existed, that it made sense; Zack had been gone for so long, yes, but so had she. If this place could bring her back, then it was certainly capable of reuniting her with Zack. Still, it was a reunion she'd never thought possible, one she'd assumed after four years was never going to happen. No matter what, Aerith had never allowed herself to believe that he was dead, but she'd believed he'd been gone from her life. She'd believed he'd moved on, that he wasn't coming back to her... But here he was. He was back.

"Oh no!" Aerith finally sputtered, shaky but at least somewhat in control of herself now. She shook her head. "No, it's my fault. I went and spilled everything all over you!" Her voice quivered a bit even as she tried her hardest to keep it steady. His hands were on her shoulders, and he was looking right at her with those eyes... Yes, they were most definitely his eyes. The flower girl forced out a laugh that probably wasn't at all convincing. "It's just... it's been..." Her voice trailed off. She couldn't even properly tease him. Wow, she needed to learn how to breathe again.

[zack_fair]

"It's no big deal, Aerith!" Zack said with a quick laugh. It was still so surreal to think that he was standing here and talking to her, holding her and hearing her voice. Not that they should be crowding the cafeteria when people were probably trying to move past them, but Zack couldn't be bothered by that right now. He could hear the strain in Aerith's voice, and all he wanted to do was make sure she felt better as soon as possible.

The fact that she couldn't even manage to laugh naturally meant that this was even worse than he'd thought. What had happened while he'd been gone? He felt his stomach start to twist with worry, but he had to stay strong for now.

First things first. They couldn't keep standing there with Aerith's food all over them, and so Zack let go of her so that he could kneel down and start to pick up the remains of the sandwich and the pieces of fruit and pile it back on the tray. The orange juice was obviously the bigger issue, but hopefully they could ask the nurses for help with that. It looked like one had already noticed the mess they'd made.

Grabbing the tray in both hands, Zack stood up again and handed it over to the nurse as he shot her a goofy grin. "Sorry about that. We kind of stumbled into each other." She didn't need to know just how important this was, after all.

The nurse had a small smile on her face. Apparently she thought it was kind of funny. Zack couldn't blame her. "I'll get you some paper towels so you can get cleaned up," she said, walking off.

"Phew!" Zack glanced over at Aerith and let his shoulders loosen up. "See, no harm done!" This wasn't even touching at the real issue, but he figured they would get to that soon enough.

[petalwitch]

Aerith nodded weakly to the nurse as she walked away with her tray. The idea that they should probably move to a table didn't really cross her mind either, and so she stood there, unable to stop staring as other patients brushed past them. At least she had her voice back. Kind of.

"Wow, you're... It's really you, isn't it?" she started softly, trying to fight back tears. She'd never let herself cry, mostly because she'd convinced herself that he was off somewhere and happy with someone else, that it had just been too hard for him to tell her about it. Four years of not crying made it especially hard to fight them back now. Still, Aerith had always been stubborn, and she was trying as hard as she could. "I didn't think I'd ever see you again." She reached up, furiously wiping at the corners of eyes with her left hand. The next laugh sounded a bit more natural. "I think I got some orange juice in my eye." She wasn't going to cry. She wasn't.

[zack_fair]

Once again, Zack couldn't judge too much when Aerith asked if it was really him. While he wasn't sure what else it could have been, one never knew when it came to Shin-Ra and whatever else. He merely grinned in response to the question, figuring that that would be enough of an answer. The question had probably been rhetorical, anyway.

"Neither did I," he plainly admitted, and that was for a completely practical reason. He shouldn't have been able to see her, but he wasn't about to complain now that it had happened. But even if Aerith was trying to act like she wasn't on the brink of tears, Zack wasn't that much of a dumb soldier. He noticed, and he wondered why she felt like she had to hide it. He'd cried openly in front of her before, so why didn't she figure that she could do the same?

Then again, this was in a crowded room. Still, Zack remembered what Aerith had done for him after Angeal's death, and so he decided to return the favor by leaning forward to wrap her into a hug. It lasted only a few seconds before the nurse returned with paper towels for them, and Zack had to release the girl in order to take the napkins from the woman. "Thanks," he said sincerely.

The nurse nodded. "Now why don't you two go sit down?" she suggested.

Zack could tell that she was worried that they'd somehow make more of a mess if they didn't get settled, and so he decided to just do as she said. "Sounds good. Thanks again." He glanced back toward Aerith and then started toward the nearest empty spot, handing her half of the paper towels as he walked.

[petalwitch]

The hug was brief, but it was enough. It felt natural for Aerith to wrap her arms around Zack in turn, hugging him tightly as if she were afraid it wasn't real. It was pretty impossible to hide the tears now, and honestly she couldn't tell if they were happy tears or all of the ones she'd locked up inside after he hadn't come back. He was here, though. Really here.

When the nurse returned with the napkins, Aerith reluctantly took a step back and away from Zack. "Yes. Thanks," she added, for once genuinely thankful for a nurse's help. The smile she wore now was completely genuine, and she was sure it showed even through her tears. Hastily wiping them away again, the flower girl followed Zack to an empty table, moping up as much of the orange juice as she could as they walked.

She wasn't sure what to say at first, but maybe that in and of itself was a conversation starter. Shaking her head, she finally found the words. "Wow, for once I really don't even know where to start. It's been such a long time. So much has happened." Aerith paused and took a moment to breathe. "You're... How are you?" Okay, so it was a little lame, but it was something!

[zack_fair]

Taking a seat, Zack held back a sigh as he brought one of his legs up so he could start wiping the juice off of his pants as best as he could. It had soaked in pretty well by now, but it didn't look like they were going to get the chance to change. It would dry eventually, though, so he'd just have to deal with being sticky for a while. He wondered when they even got to shower.

As he moved to the other leg, Zack kept his attention on Aerith. Even though he was handling this a little better than she was (probably because he had always known she was somewhat safe -- he had Tseng to thank for that), that didn't mean he wanted to take his eyes off of her for any longer than he had to. Now he really had the chance to notice all the differences that had taken place over those years -- if anything, she'd only gotten prettier.

"Me?" he asked with a laugh. While he was curious to know what had happened during his long absence (one that should have been permanent, he realized), Zack knew that he was going to have to take things slow. This was surreal for both of them, after all. "Well, I guess I have mixed feelings about it. I'm not too glad to be here, but it's better than some alternatives, right?"

Once again, he had no idea of how much Aerith really knew. Had the news spread about him already, or had Shin-Ra kept it all under lock and key? Still, after a certain amount of time passed, there was really only one conclusion to make. He watched Aerith, trying to judge from her expression if she'd heard of his death.

[petalwitch]

Mixed feelings. Aerith wished her feelings were mixed; instead it was all like a sudden onslaught of everything she'd felt for and with Zack coupled with everything she hadn't allowed herself to feel. To sit here and look at him was world shaking in the best and worst of ways. All those letters, and here she didn't know a thing to say to him. She tried to focus on what he was saying instead while still remembering to breathe. Yes, breathing was important.

"All this time, and you finally look me up in a mental institution." It was probably a pretty weak joke, but at least she was getting her sense of humor back. It was getting easier to smile too. That, of course, didn't last long as Aerith realized there was a lot she still had to ask him, things she wasn't sure she actually wanted answered. That same feeling reared its ugly head again... The one she didn't want to remember. The sense of passing, of something joining with the Lifestream. She'd felt it when Elmyra's husband had died, and she didn't want to assign the feeling she'd felt that day in the church to Zack. Her face fell a bit, and she stared down at the table for what seemed like hours before looking back up at him.

"Zack..." Her eyes probably asked what she couldn't. Maybe, just maybe, she was wrong.

[zack_fair]

While Zack could tell that Aerith was doing her best to make light of their situation, there was some truth to her words. Why was it that they had to be reunited in a place like this? He was still bothered that Aerith was even here in the first place, but at least it meant that they had the chance to see each other again. He remembered how she had been one of the only things in his thoughts as he'd dragged Cloud back to Midgar; she'd been his goal. He'd figured if he could just make it back to Aerith, everything would have worked out.

Though deep down, he'd always known that there was a good chance he wouldn't make it. Their last moments together hadn't been properly meaningful, and he still felt guilty for leaving Aerith the way he had. Maybe he could make up for that now.

Unfortunately, that look she gave him coupled with the way she spoke his name just made him feel worse. He'd let her down; he'd died on Cloud after everything they'd been through... How was he supposed to own up to that?

Still, hiding away from it would be even more cowardly. He let out a breath and managed a smile. "What is it?"

[petalwitch]

She both wanted to ask and wanted anything but to ask. Why hadn't he called? Why hadn't he written? Had he really been..? Aerith couldn't even think the words. The smile she returned when she realized she'd never be able to say them was a slightly sad one; she'd tried for it not to be, but it was hard to erase every ounce of sadness from it. All at once, she felt like a teenager again.

"...I finally got to see the sky, you know," she opted instead. "It-" reminded me of you "-was nice." Yes, maybe it was best to dwell on happier things. So long as she steered clear of the end of her own journey, things could be less solemn. "I bet you'll be surprised to know I even left Midgar and went on a big adventure of my own." Aerith wanted to ask him what he'd been up to as well, but it was hard; she was too afraid of the answer.

[zack_fair]

That unasked question played on her face, but Zack wasn't sure what to do when Aerith didn't actually get the words out. Maybe she didn't want to know -- or maybe she already knew and didn't want to have to hear it straight from his mouth. She probably didn't want to know the grizzly details; he honestly wasn't sure if he wanted to give them. Who wanted to hear about someone they cared for being riddled with bullet holes, anyway?

Zack fought not to look down at his chest again. It still took some getting used to, this living and breathing thing.

When Aerith mentioned the sky, Zack immediately found himself smiling. It had been something they'd been working toward, and while he hadn't been able to show it to her himself, he was still glad to hear that she'd made it on her own. What was even more shocking, though, was that Aerith had gone so far as to get out of the slums and explore the world for herself. Zack's smile expanded into a grin.

"You're not kidding, right? You really did that? Aerith, that's great!" He leaned forward and patted her on the shoulder -- it was the sort of thing he was more used to doing to a fellow SOLDIER, but he wasn't sure what else to fall back on when they were in a space that reminded him of the mess halls back at HQ. "I knew you could do it," he finished proudly.

[petalwitch]

"Nope! Not kidding at all." Yes, the happier things were much easier to talk about. Aerith had changed a lot since Zack had last seen her, and there were hundreds upon hundreds of things she wanted to tell him. He'd never believe that she'd seen so much of the world and done so many things. "I've been to more places than I can count on both hands, if you can believe that!" Of course, she couldn't have done all that on her own. Which reminded her... Gaia, she had so many questions.

"I wasn't by myself, though. I had a lot of friends with me. One of them... really reminded me a lot of you sometimes," she finally said, resting her hands in her lap.

[zack_fair]

While Zack could only barely believe it, he knew that Aerith wouldn't lie to him about something so important. Besides, she had to know that he was well-traveled when it came to Gaia, so he would have been able to test her. Shin-Ra had really sent him all over the place, and that was one thing he could thank the company for; he wouldn't have gotten the chance to experience so much without it.

He was genuinely shocked to hear that someone had reminded Aerith of him, though. Zack had been under the impression that he was one of a kind, so it almost bothered him, even though he knew that she couldn't have meant anything bad about it.

"How so?" he asked. "There's no way he could have matched up to my good looks." He leaned in toward her, flashing a smile as if to make his point. He was just going to have to hope that she agreed with him.