Day 46: Breakfast

[repeatingfate]

For the second time, Rika found herself waking with a start. She blinked at the grey light streaming through the windows, and looked across the room. Anise was still asleep. So. I'm still here. Let me just check...Rika put on her slippers and walked over to the desk, checking the drawer and breathing a light sigh of relief. Good, the knife was

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[euphemise]

Euphemia was a bit sad to hear that it was going to be rainy. She had hoped there was going to be some sun - even if she wouldn't be going out, she wanted to at least see some sunlight. It would cheer her up, and she needed that right then. Even the full night's sleep that she had gotten, while it had helped, wasn't entirely enough to pick up her spirits. It had just been a horribly painful day yesterday, and...

No. Thinking about it wouldn't help. She got out of bed and tossed on a sweatshirt, wishing she could at least brush out her hair before breakfast. When her nurse came, she asked about it, was told 'maybe later', and led off to the cafeteria.

At least everything smelled good, and she had to admit she was hungry after barely touching her food the night before. She topped a waffle with strawberries and whipped cream, added a side of fruit and a glass of orange juice, then sat at an empty table. It didn't seem like a lot of people were awake yet, so it was a little eerie.

[Closed to Lelouch.]

[euphemise]

"I'm sorry. I have to ask first." Euphemia swallowed around the lump that had formed in her throat the moment she saw Lelouch. Was it Lelouch, or was it Brendan? If it was the latter, she didn't think she had much else to say to him. If it was the former, though, she needed to talk to him. She couldn't let what had happened yesterday go without closure, even if it was that her brother wasn't anymore

[euphemise]

The ice in her expression melted away as Lelouch confirmed that he was actually...himself. She breathed a sigh of relief - while she still couldn't smile, not completely, Euphemia visibly relaxed. "I...I'm glad you're back, Lelouch." That much was absolutely true, but she couldn't deny that she was still hurt by what had happened. Still, though, it hadn't been him. Not really.

"Please, go on and sit down," she continued, trying to control the faint quaver in her voice. She didn't want to cry. There had been enough tears yesterday. She took another deep breath, bracing her nerves. There. That was a little better.

"What do you remember about yesterday?" That was the best starting point, she thought - if he didn't remember anything, it might be more painful, but not asking would just make it worse, she thought.

[euphemise]

Euphy did catch it, and that made her smile just a little. She still wouldn't meet his eyes, just in case, but she wanted to be on the safe side. She had a feeling Lelouch would understand that. She nibbled a little at a strawberry, feeling her appetite return a little. There was no way she would ever willingly have Japanese food again, but...this wasn't, so she could handle it, she thought.

"It wasn't your fault. Like you said, you weren't in your right mind," she said, and the more she repeated that, the easier it got. "You don't need to apologize for that."

Euphy sipped at her juice again, and then swallowed hard. "So...you know, then, that...that I know everything. Rolo told me part of it, and I asked Suzaku about the rest. I'm not mad at either of them. I'm not mad at you, either."

It still hurt. She wouldn't deny that, not at all. At least, though, she could separate out the hurt from the anger that she didn't feel anymore.

[euphemise]

Euphemia reached out, finally, taking Lelouch's hand in hers. "I know. And...at the time, I was angry. I didn't know that it was an accident at first; all I knew was what Rolo said the night before last. That I was a murderess - no, worse. I still can't say the name they were calling me. I thought that was all a lie

[euphemise]

Saying it all had lifted a weight off her shoulders that Euphy hadn't entirely realized was there. She hadn't realized holding all of that back from Lelouch was weighing as heavily as it was; she had felt the tiredness, felt the energy drain, but she sat a bit straighter, trying to get some resolve back. She couldn't linger on the past, or worry too much on the future. The latter was the hard part

[euphemise]

Euphemia frowned just a little when he looked away, but chalked it up to embarrassment, or something else. She wasn't sure, but perhaps it was an unpleasant memory? "I hope none of them hurt you," she said. If basically throwing a temper tantrum the way she had was nothing he couldn't handle, she didn't want to think about anything else that might have happened.

"I don't know about that," she answered. "I don't want to make that...that name spread around here, or anything like it. I need to be careful about how I act." There was a note of sadness in her voice. She hadn't intended to bring that up again, and she regretted it. "That's my problem, though. Don't worry about it."

Changing the subject was more than welcome, and she nodded in response to that question. "She reminds me of Cornelia a lot, and has really been like a big sister to me since I've been here. You don't have anything to worry about there. I know she might be a little bit intimidating, but she's really a good person."

[euphemise]

"She's been a good friend," Euphy answered, with a nod. "And my roommate's all right. I don't know her too well yet, but. She's been nice. And then there's Soma, and Kagura...so." She laughed a little bit, finally cracking a wide, genuine smile. "I'm doing all right on that front." Some things never changed, really. It was just one of those things all big brothers did, and it was endearing in its way.

She had to blush a little at that second question. In truth, she hadn't gotten to spend as much time with him as she might have liked, but they still generally checked in with each other every morning. And it wasn't as if she wasn't used to spending time away from him. It had happened a lot back at home.

"Things are good," she finally settled on, with a smile.