[[coming from
here]]Miles Edgeworth had developed a routine over the years for how to handle nightmares. He would wake with a start, quietly walk to the bathroom and splash his face with cool water, then walk quietly back to bed. He'd taken to keeping a book by his bedside for the - common - nights when sleep didn't come again afterwards
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When the door of his room had closed behind him, Phoenix had decided that he wasn't going to let the creepiness of the dark, empty halls get to him, and he made his way quickly back to the hall where Edgeworth had been found.
The flavor of Edgeworth's mouth lingered in his own, and Phoenix shivered at the recollection of his voice in his ear. He had never expected Edgeworth to kiss him -- in fact, he hadn't even known that Edgeworth had been interested in him in that way until tonight. The contact had been completely natural, however, as if they had been on that level of intimacy for years, and it was almost disconcerting as to how much Phoenix had liked it.
The thoughts made Phoenix slightly anxious. He had never told Edgeworth that he even had an inclination for that side of things when it came to relationships -- that is, that he was even into men. The thought that Edgeworth might think that he didn't want it worried Phoenix, more than it should have, but he shoved it out of his head. Right now, that wasn't important. What really was more important was making sure everyone was okay.
Phoenix turned his flashlight off once he had reached the familiar doorway, and he entered it, forcing himself to stop thinking and to focus on listening to the sounds and letting his eyesight adjust to the darkness.
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Adelheid managed to stumble away from the aftermath of the conflict, but just barely. His breathing was labored, his hands terribly bruised from the power he had channeled, and his shirt was soaked with his own blood.
Even worse than all of that pain was the sheer shame he felt. He had failed all of them. Edward, Eric, Rein... even Suou and the others would have been better if Adelheid hadn't been there. He couldn't have done any good against that creature on his own, and worse than that was the knowledge that Edward had forced himself into unconsciousness just to cover for that weakness. It was all Adel's fault, his weakness and failure overwhelming.
Disgustingly weak. Pitifully weak. Weak weak weak. No wonder his father had been so disgusted.
Adelheid was so caught up in his self-loathing that he didn't notice Nick, as the man still had his flashlight off.
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Phoenix saw the bloody splotch upon Adel's shirt as he turned the beam of the flashlight downwards, and his mind became aware of the metallic scent of blood in the air, his stomach turning. "Oh God..."
Panicked, his heart pounding rapidly in his chest, Phoenix wasn't sure what to do -- even though he had the medical kit in his hand, he'd never done anything like this before. His first instinct was to ease the younger man to the closest wall and then to the floor, but his mind wouldn't process the request, too caught up in trying to think of it versus acting upon his thoughts.
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...but then a hand steadied him, and even in the indirect light of the flashlight, crimson eyes gleamed as they gazed at Phoenix. When that light shifted down, Adelheid moved his hands not quite slowly enough to keep Nick from catching a brief glimpse of them. They were badly bruised, both of them, and stood out vividly against pale skin and red splotches.
Despite Adel's labored breathing, he motioned for the man to continue on. "The others are worse off than I am. Eric might need help tending to them before day comes. I'll be fine. Take a deep breath and calm yourself, or it'll only be worse for you."
He said it all a bit shortly, but honestly; he didn't want Nick to be sick, and his tone betrayed the slightest bit of fondness. The older man had returned. That felt kind of good, really.
But when Adel tried to take another step forward, his light-headedness made the world spin before his eyes, the loss of blood and pain making it hard to see straight. So he slumped against the wall once more, weakly trying to shake that hand off of him. More out of the principle of the matter than anything else. "I'll be fine. I can last until morning."
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"You know I can't do that," Phoenix said, softly, before he turned the flashlight off and slid it into his pocket, his now free hand reaching out and grasping Adelheid's wrist. The pulse underneath Adelheid's skin was reassuring, and helped Phoenix to focus. "I'm not going to let you bleed to death." He moved close, wanting to ease Adelheid down to the floor so he wasn't expending more energy than he had to. He couldn't force the man into giving in, but he could encourage it.
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Regardless of the reason, Adelheid eased down to the floor, allowing the lawyer to help him down. He knew that Eric wouldn't have minded helping him in that regard, but he honestly didn't want anyone to see him like this. "I won't bleed to death," the teenager muttered, "I've gone through worse just getting these wounds. I'll be fine."
And yet Nick's fingers felt warm against the young fighter's wrist, even though his pulse was racing and the heat of battle hadn't yet bled off. Only after the boy had rested for a moment did he ask, "Why can't you? I'm... not weak. This, at least, I can do."
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"You're not weak, by a long shot, but everyone needs help sometimes." A slight frown appeared on the defense attorney's face. Adelheid was infinitely stronger than him, but everyone was human in their own right. "I'm not going to leave you here. So...could you take off your shirt? Or do you want me to do it for you?"
He wasn't going to take no for an answer -- not after Adelheid had gone out of his way to help find Edgeworth and the others. He didn't care how much Adel protested. Phoenix wasn't going to rest until he was all right.
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But now, even that was a fresh stab of agony. If his sister had been in this place, he wouldn't have been able to protect her from the monster. Hah, even his greatest strength was a weakness in this place. Rose would have been so disgusted with his performance, Adelheid was certain of that.
Pain radiated through his body as Adel grabbed the hem of his shirt and roughly tugged it off. If he had been more gentle, it might have been better for him, but he was beyond caring what happened to him at that point. Whatever his pain, it was nothing compared to what Ed and Rein had gone through. Perhaps, even, the additional suffering would enforce the lesson, make sure that he never was so useless again.
The soaked material was dropped to the floor, baring Adelheid's heavily-scarred torso and the deep cuts that had reopened, rendering some of Eric's help useless. And while Nick thought that everyone needed help, that was a theory that Adelheid was honestly frightened of. That his own power wouldn't be enough... and yet, very obviously, such was the case.
So he was silent and he looked away from the lawyer, not able to meet those shining eyes.
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He then picked up the ruined t-shirt on the floor, sopping up some of the blood with a concerned look on his face. The color had drained out of his face, but he was determined to focus on helping Adelheid. He glanced up at the younger man's face, but realized that Adel wasn't looking at him. He didn't press it, however, not understanding entirely what had happened in the battle, but getting the feeling that it hadn't been pleasant.
Phoenix had recognized the look of defeat on Adel's face, but had thought that he had imagined it. However, when Adel had pulled his shirt off, the motion angry and careless, Phoenix had realized the truth of his prior presumption. The defense attorney took a silent, deep breath, before he began to speak. "...thank you. For helping me to find Edgeworth. And for fighting for all of us." Fingers smeared with Adel's blood, he began to bandage up the wounds, if only to stop the bleeding and to staunch the pain a tad. "He's back in my room right now. If it hadn't been for you and the rest...he would have been left to that monster."
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"You shouldn't be thanking me," the teen muttered as he leaned forward, giving the lawyer room enough to work with. Of course, bandaging the wounds on Adelheid's torso brought the two men close, so close that Nick's warm breath could be felt by the teenager, and so the German felt a little awkward even as he continued looking away. Why was he fine with letting the man see him at his worst? Normally he'd have insisted that the others be looked after, but... perhaps it was just Phoenix's concern that was making it different? "I did nothing of note except getting slammed into the wall and being 'bait' for its attention. I wasn't able to protect anyone, much less your friend."
And for the life of him, Adelheid Bernstein didn't understand why the other was attempting to be consoling. Failure was failure!
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"If you hadn't been able to protect any of us, we wouldn't even be breathing." Phoenix paused in his bandaging, and he moved his right hand up, his fingertips touching Adelheid's jaw in an attempt to get him to look back. "Look at me, Adel. I can't do anything that you can. I couldn't have gone face to face with that thing. If you didn't do anything, then what does that make me?" Phoenix was silent for a moment, before a slight smile appeared on his lips. Adelheid had sacrificed himself to help Phoenix, and was now in pain as a result of it -- he had nothing to be ashamed of, no matter what had happened. "You were a hero out there, nothing less."
Phoenix's blue eyes were full of admiration and concern for the younger man. It was difficult for Phoenix to see Adelheid like this, so defeated and disappointed with himself, and it was all he could do to try to cheer him up, regardless of whether it was going to work or not.
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This was... different. And strange. And Adelheid honestly didn't know how to handle it. It made him feel awkward, it made the words he wanted to say twist around into nonsense in his mind, and at the same time it made warmth spread through his being. It was the same way he'd felt when Nick had massaged his hand after giving the demonstration; undeniable tenderness, and with an undercurrent that the teenager didn't understand but nevertheless liked.
It made him straighten up, a tiny fraction; despite the hatred he held for himself, the older man's words weren't being ignored. Just... disbelieved. "I'm not a hero," he muttered at last, "I... it's different for me. I should have been able to do more. My power should have been enough to hold it off for everyone. I should have been able to keep anyone else from needing to sacrifice themselves."
The name of Bernstein, the weight of his own power and his responsibility, were such heavy burdens to bear... "As a Bernstein and as a warrior, it's intolerable for others to have paid for my lack of skill. Even if..."
And that was where he stopped. How could he say that the life of Edgeworth and Phoenix weren't worth his own shame? To do so would be the height of hubris and idiocy, and yet that was how he felt. In the end, he lamely changed it to, "...I should have been the one to lose consciousness while fighting. The others shouldn't have needed to pay that price."
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He began to loop the bandages around Adelheid's left palm, his thumbs gently smoothing over the dark, wounded spots on his hand. "But...I know they all gave everything they could -- I think that's something to be proud of." Just like Maya, when she had tried so hard for me and had even stopped training just to help me... Phoenix didn't know exactly everything that had gone on in the battle, but he knew that none of the people who had come into that hall would have given anything less than their best. It wasn't even possible to give less, when this mental hospital took away so much and left only the bare minimum.
Phoenix regarded Adelheid seriously. He knew Adelheid was fully capable of doing incredible things outside of this hospital, but they were here, and this place had different rules that none of the patients could control. "You were part of that. Even if you think you should have been injured like them...it doesn't matter. As long as you fought as hard as you could, logically, without thinking of what you could do if you weren't here, you have nothing to not be proud of."
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It was grating, and unforgivable, at the same time. He had servants, of course, and in such a dangerous business as he had been in casualties had been expected... but never had he been truly close to them, nor had the relationship ever been anything except money for service. This was something else entirely, and it hurt because he hadn't offered anything to the others.
"Nick... my best isn't good enough any longer. I thought, at the start, that I could use my own power to find the answer and escape, and that teaming with others was a luxury and not a necessity. But last night, and now this... once I could be defeated only by treachery. Yet this time, only treachery allowed us to come out alive and victorious. It... may be best for you to find someone else to protect you." Now he looked at the lawyer, his voice soft and yet imploring. "I made that rash promise without knowing the full truth of the matter. I could easily take this pain on myself, many times over, but I could not live with myself if you were to suffer as the others here have. So... please, ask around and find someone more powerful than myself to entrust your safety to. Take the medical kit, if that would be a useful bargaining tool for it."
It tore Adelheid up inside, to be saying all of this, but it was true. He couldn't protect Nick, not from the more powerful things in the Institute. And even though he barely knew the older man, Adelheid knew that he would never forgive himself if his laxness led to the other's harm. Hence why he had been so adamant in Nick knowing to run as soon as any of the true fighters had told him to.
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A few moments after he was finished, Phoenix shook his head. "Adel...it doesn't matter if you were injured. It doesn't matter if I have the medical kit, or if you think that you can't protect me. I'm not going to leave your side just because this place hurt you. I'm your friend. I would never do that to you...friends don't turn around and decide that any of their friends are useless and aren't worth staying around. I know you promised...and you haven't done anything to break that promise. Even if you did, I wouldn't hold it against you, and I wouldn't leave." A smile appeared on Phoenix's face. "We're in this together, right? That's what we agreed on."
Phoenix then moved on to Adel's other hand. "That was my promise to you, too. I know I'm probably not the most useful person here...but I'd like to be part of your 'team', if I can." We're all in this place together. Without each other, we'll fall apart. Just like Edgeworth and I...if we didn't bond together, or if I didn't want to find him...we could have lost each other here. The defense attorney understood what Adelheid was saying. But what it sounded like to Phoenix was a lonely plea for a connection, as isolated as Adelheid seemed to want himself to be. "Your best is something I'm grateful for. Not every person in the world likes to put their heart and soul into protecting someone else. I think that's more valuable than anything else I could ask or bargain myself for."
Phoenix knew Adelheid was a good person. It was evident from every direction that he was, and the defense attorney was never going to walk away from that kind of thing when he knew, honestly, that Adelheid had done nothing to drive him away. And even if he had, the problem would have been worth working on and solving -- Phoenix wouldn't abandon him because of something like that.
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It had to be the way Phoenix Wright said all of those things, with such complete sincerity and with that heart-warming smile. That was what made Adelheid believe that the older man wouldn't leave him just because he was injured, and that Nick was a friend who wouldn't decide that Adelheid was useless or weak, and that they were in it together... and most importantly, that his protection was valuable. More than that, that it was both appreciated and considered the most important thing.
Nick would probably be upset by Adelheid's next actions, but any protests were silenced by a raised hand. The bandages around both hands were unwound, up until the tender flesh was revealed once more. Then, gently, Adelheid took Nick's hands between his own. It hurt, it felt like a thousand blazing knives were jabbed into the wounds... and yet he smiled, something of the gleam in his eyes returning as he gazed at Phoenix. It was almost ritualistic, in a sense, but at the same time Adelheid said it so honestly that it was obvious his words came straight from his heart. "My best may not be enough, but I offer it again. I will protect you to the utmost of my abilities, and I swear that we are in this together. As you said to me, so I say to you; 'I'm your friend,' and 'friends don't decide that any of their friends are useless or not worth staying around.'"
The words shivered in the air, strong despite all of the pain that Adelheid had to be feeling. Only when the last echo had died away did Adel speak again, his smile just a little bit wider as he tried to joke, however lamely. "...though I still don't understand how all of you became my friends without me being consulted on the matter."
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