Nightshift 39: Main Hallway, 1-Center

[fourtharcana]

[from here]

He paused at hearing a noise in the hallway. Akihiko whipped his head around, searching for the source. "You're paranoid," he told himself quietly, when he didn't see it.

He shrugged again, noting the Sun Room door was partially open. He pushed the door open and stepped inside.

[to here]

Comments

[piggy_king]

[from here. Sorry to butt in!]

Yes! Porky could see the Commander now! Oh, finally Porky would have some competent help!

"Oh, Commander~~~!" Porky said in a singsong voice, "Your king has arrived! Aren't you glad to see me? Oh, of course you are! Not nearly as glad as I am to see you, though! Anyway, this guy here is Diego," Porky said as he turned around and pointed at Diego, "He's my roommate, and a little unaccustomed to being a human. He was an animal before he came here. Isn't that just fascinating? It may be interesting, but it also means he's a little clumsy, so I suppose most of the fighting will be done by you. If we do any fighting, that is."

Porky leaned in a little closer to whisper something to the Commander.

"That being said, Commander," Porky whispered, making sure to be quiet enough so that only the Commander could hear him, "There's no telling how he would react if he learned about the Chimera Lab, so you are not to tell him about any of the experiments conducted there or any of the experiments conducted on animals. This is of incredible importance if we are to have any unity as a team, so do not mention it at all."

As Porky took a step back from the Commander, he noticed the man standing next to him. So the Commander had actually been successful in his mission! As expected from the most obedient and competent member of the Pigmask Army!

"Ah, hello!" Porky said cheerfully, "I'm Porky Minch! I'm sure that the Commander told you all about the Pigmask club and that's why you're here! So, do you want to join? We're currently accepting members, you know!"

[oober_tracker]

Diego arrived shortly after Porky Minch did, right hand still against the wall for balance and the hammer still hanging limply from his left. He studied the two humans already standing there, eyes narrowed in slight suspicion, while Porky Minch went through a very animated speech Diego didn't hear half of.

So that was the Commander. He didn't look anything like Diego had expected him to, what with everything Porky Minch said about him. He looked young, and much more like the humans Diego was used to than anything else he'd encountered. That dredged up the vague sense of familiarity he'd been looking for, but it didn't make anything else any less strange.

[chocomancer]

"Ah, I see," Wonka said, hiding his growing confusion (and curiosity) at the Commander's odd speech patterns - whether he was not used to conversation, or whomever was controlling him was doing a bad job of it, neither one would be proper to mention. "Well, given how different some of our homelands are here, I could understand a difference like that."

...and speaking of control, it seemed the "King" had arrived, with his roommate in tow. Interesting that he'd been able to make the sale on this "Pig Mask Club" to him in just one shift... although such an exuberant old man would probably have been a much better salesman than his emotionless, awkward deputy. And then there was the fact that the roommate probably didn't know two licks about human society.

Wonka smiled and nodded at the greeting, and returned it with an exuberant smile and a wave of the hand. "Pleased to meet you, Porky, Diego. Willy Wonka's my name. Career chocolatier and confectioner, currently confined by circumstance in this crazy compound conjointly with the Commander and apparently the two of you as well." He cleared his throat, and added, "Your deputy did tell me about the Pig Mask Club, but I'm not sure I want to be involved too heavily; given one thing and another, I do my work best alone. But I'm certainly willing to supply you with the fruits of my craft if you so desire." He quickly double-checked his mental process, just in case Porky really was a psychic and not just honey-tongued. No commitments, no promises of free supplies... yes, it all seemed quite in-character. Good. And if the pudgy king was interested, well... they could decide on terms when they got to that.

[maskedsunflower]

The Commander stood at attention as Porky arrived, in contrast to the friendly and cheerful greeting the king had offered him. But when Porky spoke, first in general and then quietly to the Commander's ear, he nodded in acknowledgment, then turned to Diego.

"Hello. I am the Commander." Social aptitude was blooming. Looking over the other man, he noticed the slight awkwardness in his stance, giving further evidence to what King P had said about a change from animal to human. "That is fascinating," he agreed without any particular tone in his voice to indicate actual interest. It sounded like something that was part of the Fascinating Chimera Project, even if he couldn't make the comparison by Porky's orders. It also reminded him slightly of himself, human in mind and partially in body, but still very different from an actual human being. Diego's appearance of humanity was equally convincing to the naked eye. Neither was of any real importance.

Turning slightly, the Commander gestured towards his own guest as Willy Wonka politely and somewhat poetically introduced himself. Finding nothing else to be said, he only nodded again in agreement. Pulling out the piece of chocolate he'd saved from lunch, he offered it towards King Porky, still wrapped in paper, with his left hand.

"This is chocolate. He was distributing this at lunch. That was when I told him about the important club forming here." His tone was serious enough that he might as well have been offering up gunpowder or secret plans to the facility. It was just his duty to report all aspects of his interaction with Willy Wonka, so King Porky would know what best to do about the man who didn't seem to want to commit. But all people would follow King Porky eventually.

[piggy_king]

"Oh, Commander!" Porky squealed as he ripped the chocolate out of the Commander's hands, "You shouldn't have! You're so thoughtful!"

Porky began to eat the chocolate. Oh, it was so good~~~! Porky hadn't eaten it in several thousand years, and not a day went by that Porky didn't long for the sweet taste of chocolate in his mouth. Well, that probably wasn't true, but Porky certainly thought about it a lot! Either way, it tasted good.

As Porky ate the chocolate, he began to think. It would be useful to have "Willy Wonka" in the Pigmask club, but Porky didn't want to force him to join. It would be too risky, and, if it failed, Wonka would probably tell everyone about Porky's ambitions. Plus, Porky would only get free chocolate if Wonka joined. Porky may be gluttonous, but he wasn't gluttonous to risk his reputation.

Hey, wait a minute...If this "Willy Wonka" was the guy that had given the Commander the chocolate during lunch, then that probably meant...

"Ah!" Porky said in mid-bite, "You're the guy advertising the chocolate on the bulletin board, aren't you? Oh, what a coincidence! I'm the guy that was offering the first aid kits in exchange! Here, they're right in this bag."

Porky set down the pillowcase and fished around for the first aid kits. There were a few, four to be precise, so Porky pulled out three to give to Wonka, leaving one for himself. There was no telling when they would run into a monster, after all. "So, do you think this would be enough to get some chocolate?" Porky asked, holding the first aid kits in his hands.

[oober_tracker]

...Chocolate? What was that?

Something that you could eat, apparently. Diego watched the small brown piece of food change hands, and then get shoved between Porky Minch's teeth. A corner of his mouth turned up in disgust as he watched the food slowly get eaten. He wasn't too sure about the eating habits of humans, but he knew they didn't eat the kind of food Sid ate. Watching a human eat something that wasn't meat was like watching a mammoth and a sloth try to raise a human baby. Without the entertainment aspect.

There was very little else of the conversation Diego understood, so he simply kept quiet and watched.

[chocomancer]

So the Commander has been saving the chocolate for Porky! In retrospect, it made sense, given how un-childlike the boy tended to act... but he still hadn't expected him to save none for himself. Wonka wasn't about to comment on it, though - even ignoring the fact that the Commander probably wasn't any more human than Porky's silent roommate, it wasn't as though everyone cared for chocolate. On the other hand, Porky's appetite seemed to be enough for both of them - it reminded him of a somewhat younger fellow he'd met with a similar passion - and this conclusion only gained ground in Wonka's mind when the king revealed that he'd been the one to offer the First Aid kits over the board. By the time Porky had pulled out the goods, the wheels in Wonka's head had already begun to turn, and it took him a second or so to snap out of his faraway look and respond to the man's question.

"Oh, definitely, sir!" he said once he had come back to reality. "In fact, we could conduct a trade now if you wanted! I've got an unbroken bar here somewhere, I'm sure of it..." Wonka began to dig around in his own pillowcase, pulling out several scraps of paper before finally finding the waffle iron that held an as-yet-untouched, Belgian-waffle-shaped hunk of chocolate inside. Carefully pulling it out, he held it up in front of him, inspecting it with one eye. "I'm still getting the assembly-line together, of course, so these prices aren't final... but even in these early stages I could probably trade you this one for... two of those First Aid kits. Or if you'd fancy a deal, one kit and some information about the world you're from. I must say, the Commander had me curious with all the praise he gave you at lunch. And to be honest," he added, in a lower tone of voice, "I'm a bit curious about his story as well."

[piggy_king]

"My, my!" Porky said cheerfully, "What a bargain! And here I was ready to give you all three! I suppose I'll take you up on that offer. The one about the information, I mean."

It sure was lucky that Wonka only wanted one first aid kit, and in exchange for such a huge piece of chocolate, too! Plus, if Porky could tell only bits and pieces of the truth, it would make Porky's reputation better. Either way, it was a win-win for Porky.

"Alright," Porky began as he handed over the first aid kit, "The Commander and I come from a place called the Nowhere Islands. You probably haven't heard of them, since they're in the distant future. Anyway, I'm the king of them, and the Commander is the leader of the army there. We hardly ever have to do any fighting, though, which is good, because I simply abhor conflict, don't you? ...Anyway, you're probably wondering why the Commander acts the way he does."

Porky paused momentarily. It would be difficult to "spin" this to make Porky look good. He had been, after all, responsible for the Commander's death in the first place.

"Well," Porky said slowly, "The Commander acts in a way that you probably think of as 'odd' because he had died in the past. I found his corpse in a mountain range on the Nowhere Islands. He had been attacked by a massive lizard, you see. Anyway, I couldn't stand to see someone die so needlessly in my kingdom, so I had my scientists bring him back to life. The operation was a success, but parts of his brain had to be replaced, as you probably already surmised. As a result, he cannot experience emotions. Not only does he still see me as his king, but he also owes his life to me. Our relationship certainly isn't a common one, but I certainly hope you understand his actions now."

"Thanks for the chocolate, by the way," Porky smiled, "It's been years since I've had any."

[maskedsunflower]

[Order change? ^^;]

The Commander had nothing to say about the King's descriptions of Nowhere Islands or of his own creation. It was certainly true that they didn't have to fight often, but that was easily credited to the fact that almost nothing on the islands was able to fight, aside from themselves and the chimeras. The idea of being killed by a large lizard seemed strange, since no species of lizard, even a chimera, could defeat him now. But that was all unimportant to him, aside from listening to be sure their stories agreed if he was asked and King Porky expected him to repeat the same story about his creation.

Instead, he waited silently off to the side, only glancing at Diego again. The trade was successful, which was good, since it was what the King wanted. His own offering of chocolate being a waste or surplus was also not a problem, considering King Porky's diet. The Commander's posture was a sort of calm parade rest, waiting for some order or sign to act.

[oober_tracker]

Diego tried to imagine a place where someone like Porky Minch was the king, with enough power to bring people back to life. It didn't work. He suspected Porky Minch was lying, or at least exaggerating some parts of the story. He wouldn't put it past humans to do that all the time in a future where they could talk.

In some ways, the human reminded him more and more of Sid with each passing moment. In other ways... he was more like those clowny birds that thought three watermelons would keep them alive for billions of years.

Not that Sid was any less like that sometimes.

Diego was beginning to wonder why he'd ever agreed to come along. If all they were going to do was stand there and discuss strange food and 'nowhere' islands, he'd probably leave pretty soon. Find where that fresh air smell had come from and see where it led.

[chocomancer]

Regardless of all the mysteries surrounding Porky and his deputy, Wonka immediately recognized Porky's explanation - it was exactly the kind of bragging that President Gillygrass had kept slipping into during dinner. The pandering to what one thought another person's opinions to be, the use of "I" when one really meant "someone who works for me"... in general, the king seemed to be a strange cross between the President and Augustus Gloop. No, that was all right. He could work with that.

"Oh, it's no trouble, really," Wonka replied, when Porky had finally finished talking. "This batch isn't nearly up to my usual snuff, and one First Aid kit is enough for my purposes for the moment. As it is, I'm glad we could do business, and look forward to doing so again. I'd hate to be holding you up, though, so unless there was anythng else...?"

[piggy_king]

"Nope! I don't think we're doing anything else here," Porky responded cheerily, putting the chocolate in his pillowcase, "I believe right now we're headed to either the kitchen or the lab. Have to be prepared if we run into a monster, don't you know! I have a feeling that a knife or a frying pan would work wonders on some of the beasts here!"

Gohohoho! The night was already off to a great start! Not only had Porky managed to coerce some extra help from Diego, and not only had Porky found the Commander, but Porky also got a waffle made entirely out of chocolate! Sweet, sweet, delicious chocolate...

"Anyway, we really must be going," Porky said after he had wiped a bit of drool from his face, "It was a pleasure to meet you, Mr. Wonka, and I hope that we'll be able to continue trading! So, Commander and Diego, are you two ready?"

[maskedsunflower]

It didn't seem as though the man would be joining the "club" anyway, but King Porky was pleased with the outcome, so an alliance was enough. Approaching the man at lunch had been good. Since the rest of his efforts hadn't been successful, the Commander decided to try to restrict himself to people who seemed to be inviting conversation already, like Willy Wonka. Diego's status was still unclear, but if the King wanted him to come along, then obviously he had to come along.

"I do not have any weaponry apart from my abilities and the flashlight." He wasn't complaining, or suggesting the King had forgotten about that, but he had asked if the Commander was ready, and the Commander couldn't lie about how ready he really was. "I can proceed but cannot fight with my usual strength."

[oober_tracker]

"You can't fight with your usual strength?" Diego muttered under his breath. "At least you woke up the same species."

Instead of answering Porky's question, Diego slowly pushed himself off the wall until only one hand was against it again. He was relieved that they were finally going somewhere, but much more apprehensive about the 'getting there' part. The saber was slowly getting used to the upright stance and the longer limbs, but maneuvering them in any kind of a graceful way was only going to come with a lot more practice. Practice Diego didn't particularly intend to have.

[chocomancer]

"The same to you, sir," Wonka said. "Good luck for your little expedition, and I hope to see you all again soon - and preferrably safe and sound, too!" Then, with a tip of his nonexistant hat, Wonka wandered off to think over what he'd learned and wait for Honey and his friends to arrive.

[chocomancer]

[to here]