Night 59: Men's Bathrooms (M41-M80)

[deadlyjuliet]

[from here]

Exquisite. There was no other way to describe being in a hall one moment and then suddenly appearing in the restroom in less time than it took the rest of the Institute to take a breath. This place was dark as always and Grell grinned as he realized it didn't matter this time. A death god's eyes, nearsighted as they might be, were

Comments

[damned_monsters]

Surprisingly enough, the child took the attack without any complaint, without even crying out. And yet the mimic could tell that he was in a different sort of anguish, something that it could feed on and grown strong from. Its stolen lips curled up into a sated smirk, but then --

Then the door opened and yet another one strolled in. The creature knew enough from the few memories it could borrow of this Rubedo to realize that this was the third and last brother. The one who could heal, the one who couldn't be predicted. The tables had suddenly been turned and it only had a split second to react.

And so it switched its attack from one brother to the other, from black to white, as it turned with the sword still in hand, just fast enough to block Albedo's onslaught with the blade. It was clear now that Albedo's arm was no longer just an arm, but that it had been transformed into something else through his own power. That wasn't something that the mimic could compete with, but it had a few tricks up its sleeve.

"So willing to take me down, twin?" the mimic said in Rubedo's voice, intending to mock Albedo, to draw a reaction out of him. "Since when did you decide you liked Nigredo more than me? I'm hurt." It put its free hand to its chest and then started to laugh, a strange mimicry of Albedo's own laughter from when he'd first entered.

But as it laughed, its teeth morphed into something different, sharpening into deadly fangs -- and suddenly it looked barely anything like their missing brother.

[falseblack]

A smile would keep him there. Laughter would break him of stagnation.

Another's waveform all but shone in the dark interior--magenta and violet and a color he couldn't name. Nigredo started at the onslaught of emotion as the brother he had once intended to return to met hand to sword, as twins confronted in a nature far too familiar to call a first. He walked to the stall door in uneven footsteps, the effort forcing blood to pour forth from the hole in his chest. Shock ebbed and placed determination before him. There was no choice. He couldn't name a conscious decision. He needed only to reach out and pull them apart.

Since when did you decide you liked Nigredo more than me?

What did he have that I didn't?

Instead, to freeze. That was the way of it, was it not? In regards to him, it seemed. To place him as an excuse for brothers to wage war while he didn't. Wouldn't. And they would watch the ones they loved turn against each other.

Now, pressed against the bathroom stall for support, it seemed to register. Rubedo had rejected Nigredo, in the simplest and basest of ways. In wanting the end of his life. And the youngest couldn't (despite knowing, always waiting with bated breath) stop the overwhelm of hurt. Couldn't bar wretched misery from mixing with the sensation of nerves. He couldn't stop his brothers who hated him, and in the process, what had snapped in half soon fell away. The world faded like a lone shadow on the wall. Consciousness should soon give out.

It was here memory took hold. It was here Nigredo finally remembered, and the thought forced him to breathe.

Albedo came for him as promised. Was now demonstrating protectiveness on his behalf, foreign as it might be. The middle variant could decide to declare a pass in preference, but as hopeless as he was, Nigredo wondered if he would say what had been made fact a day prior. That Albedo had chosen Nigredo. That he wanted him.

That he was something worth staying and not just simply a life to be thrown away.

[purpletaint]

Blade met power and sparks fell in a multicolored shine. It seemed that this thing could at least move in defense to some skill. With Nigredo’s blade, he would add. But the weapons did not stop there, and issuing forth from Rubedo’s mouth came words Albedo never thought to hear. And once heard, something eased inside of him. Loosened the deadly grip of hate into something sharper, a languid ease. The creature laughed as if a duplicate of Albedo himself, and Albedo smiled almost fondly.

The hand that had attacked twisted to grip the blade wholly in a firm grasp. He yanked forward on it at the same time his power billowed outward with force to throw the creature further back. “Twin?” Albedo echoed, laughter in the tones. “As if that blood traitor ever called me that in such casual use. And caring where my affections lay?” Albedo giggled, then tsked at the creature. “Better do your homework. That was my role, not his.” As if Rubedo ever cared anything of Albedo. As if the time was spent at all on unearthing the mysteries of the white-haired Variant.

The adamant defense had changed to deadly amusement in a blink, but still, even now, Albedo was aware of the scent of blood. But there was a two-step in this. There was a game to play, even now. Let the creature come.

[damned_monsters]

The creature tensed when Albedo grabbed for the blade, but it didn't have the time to wrench it back away from the boy before a wave of power had been sent through it. The energy moved through the blade as a conduit and then blasted right into the mimic's adopted form, causing it to cry out (around sharpened teeth, and with its voice distorted) and stumble back against the wall.

It didn't matter if its facts were wrong now, of course. The cat was already out of the bag and while these two were giving off enough negative emotion to make it feel satiated for a day or so, it still had to fight its way out.

With its fangs revealed and Rubedo's face distorted by a mouth that was suddenly too large, the mimic was ready to fight. It tossed the sword to the side, across the room, and then lunged for Albedo, hands reaching out to grab the boy's shoulders so that it could dig its teeth into his neck.

[purpletaint]

It seemed the creature wasn’t in the mood for further banter. The sword went spinning off, and Albedo straightened slowly, knees bent on the chance quick movement was needed. He had half thought the thing would take off after that, and he would have to give chase. Instead it came at him, despite the differences that were present now. Albedo felt its hands on him, and still, still recognized those hands, and for half a beat, he thought to let it. Not for the reasons Nigredo had thought, but for his own. For the simple fact of it was okay, if it was Rubedo.

…Faulty thoughts, that. And not wholly allowed in Albedo’s present state. His mind shifted and surged, for Albedo knew, knew well, what was required of Rubedo if they were to meet, one enlightened against one born a perfect weapon. Dragon versus near god, and if they were to come to terms, it would be through blood and burning, rage and hate, and Albedo knew that, had it pressed into him until he sobbed from the force. Yes, he knew.

It was why, as the creature leaned down, that Albedo did not physically react. Instead his force went to his waveform, will pushing power behind it, and he threw that into the thing that had worn Rubedo’s face, filling it with things humans, mortals, shouldn’t bear. Teeth closed into his neck, and Albedo’s eyes narrowed suddenly, disgusted by all of this charade. The entity pulled, and everything given came back to him with little wear.

This, of course, had the unpleasant side effect of destroying the thing in front of him, form exploding into pieces from the sharp flow of power slamming through it. It rained blood and gore, and Albedo absentmindedly lifted a hand to his neck--plucked out a sharp tooth that had stuck in a tendon and felt his flesh closing against his fingers.

It was alright, if it was Rubedo? Did he really keep to that now?

Albedo was unnaturally stoic, in the aftermath. There lacked giggles of delight or words thrown in knowledge and recrimination. For a moment, he was silent, thoughtful--fingers trailing along skin as if one unaware.

[falseblack]

What passed through awareness revealed little--a facet of conversation and a flutter in the air. Nothing of answers and deficiency in all else, and Nigredo was fading. There was murderous intent, but the child couldn't place the origin. Whether a want for death came hand-in-hand with protection or a sentiment on its own, he did not know. Could not say.

The child watched very carefully, but the images refused to stay. They danced to a offbeat rhythm as they pulled away from comprehension, falling to the wayside. There was an outcry, a play at war, and Rubedo's mouth shaped to suit that of a monster. Funny. In consideration of the implication, it seemed comedic for this brother. To act much like the label he had once despised with such a poignant display was contrary. So much so that it felt unreal.

And somehow, the patterns of this night seemed obvious. Nigredo deemed it perfectly reasonable to expect a dead end, despite what either might have held. What either might have been in a solitary world of only them. Someone here would die, regardless of who else was present.

The premonition arrived too late. Before he could reach out and beg for a peaceful resolution, flesh ripped against waveform. Rubedo, in that instant, was gone. In his place rained blood and pieces, and despite his faltering vision, he thought he recognized red hair. Fragments of a torn number.

As silence filled the room, Nigredo's waveform stuttered. Pressed against himself and gave away. The sight of a dead brother caused consciouness to flee, and the boy toppled to the floor.

[purpletaint]

At the briefest stutter, Albedo's head whipped to the side to view Nigredo. And as the other started to fall forward, Albedo jolted and dove to reach him first, a hand slipping around his brother's waist as he cushioned him with his knees. There was blood soaking through already, and he lightly moved the material to view the wound. No, not fatal. It had not even broken ribs or exposed bone, but it was on thin skin and would bleed fiercely. He knew this in the way that he knew the lines from before--not of experience but of exposure.

In that self-same way, he angled his arm to mimic the wound and pressed firmly, then stared at Nigredo, eyes bright and unreadable. "Nigredo." A question. A command. A complete focus in this moment.

[falseblack]

There was a question here. A name called. A label considered to be unnecessary to a tool such as he, but to him, it was his name. Nigredo. Nigredo. It was perhaps the only thing that was truly his, and thus, the form that fled moved to accept.

The lids of his eyes trembled, and the boy looked as though he was trying to remember being awake. Someone was touching him, keeping the fire in his chest from pouring out its contents, even as he thought that someone should let it. He had lost something. He didn't think he could ever get it back.

So they should end it here, should they not?

Nigredo whimpered but did not move to open his eyes.

[purpletaint]

Attention was refined to a single point and he caught the fluttering lashes against cheeks, heard with a sharp clarity the quiet whimper. Albedo inhaled sharply, something denied with that sound. A portion of him wanted to shove his brother away and curl in a corner alone, but that was overwhelmed with force, beaten into pavement and left a mess there.

Albedo did nothing outwardly for a moment, only extended his waveform and moved it to Nigredo's. No injuries, not from this, but the obvious--so it was not the physical that was hindering his brother. He slid closer, waveforms mixing, reaching for a higher understanding. The hesitance that had touched briefly in his room had been forgotten; if Albedo was wary of Nigredo being connected to something U-DO tainted, it was something currently unaware. His brother was... fine, though confused in ways, and more--

Loss. The seeping, overwhelming sense of loss. And Albedo couldn't pinpoint the cause.

Though he had an idea.

Albedo leaned down, shoulders touching and foreheads bumping lightly. "Nigredo, you're fine," he gave, declaration and plea. {You are fine.} The link shivered between them, and Albedo quietly remembered his insecurity on the subject. Tried to ignore it and force it away. Instead, he remembered a truth made clear. And put this with it strongly. {That wasn't Rubedo. You know it wasn't.}

Knowing and feeling were two different things. Albedo knew this better than any. "This place pulls from different realities here. None of the Rubedos we've met were the one from our own. That's what I was going to tell you before. None that we met were ours." This, more than any; this-- {And this was only a creature. Not even a person. Just a thing that took on form.}

Just a thing that acknowledged pain and loss.

[falseblack]

Yes, loss. Consuming and belligerent, the cause and the form of decay his soul had given to. How long had Nigredo been in this state? Thirteen days should not feel like years. The blood pooling at their feet need only be his own. What complaint did he have of loss? When there was always one who could claim to it more fiercely than he, what use did he have of lacking? He had moved in his own way, forcing his brothers at a distance as to not feel it.

And irony would have him feel it here. Again and again. Of warring, of revelation, of memories and facts he wished never to hold. He would hold them here.

Another's waveform moved to touch, its distinct and familiar nature all but shining in his mind's eye. Nigredo would allow the other, would shift to accept him for there seemed nothing else. No one else. Only one deemed familiar above all and the thing that sometimes held his mind.

There were gestures, featherlight and abrasive all the same. This touch felt too close to love, gentle pressure to elicit warmth. The words were opposite, a pull at entails to full view. A cold truth. Nigredo could not turn either away, even as he would move to bring a connecting line.

Rubedo wasn't their Rubedo, but he could become just like them.

He opened his eyes, slowly as to allow sight an easy path. Against him, holding him, was Albedo, and without thinking, Nigredo smiled. His words were opposite. {I would have let him.} Still, despite the promise made. {Whoever he was... I would have let him.} If he wanted.

{But you understand that more than me, right? Because he'e everything to you.} Nigredo blinked. The words were a mess. {Just like you and he are to me.}

[purpletaint]

The reach in waveform was grasped in turn, and Albedo did not think to pull away, even now. It'd be too simple, really. At this point in time. To reach a bit further, rend what was soft and sweet, and tear Nigredo's psyche to shreds. Here, still, he felt that. Here, still, he also how easy that would be. Nigredo was already breaking--Albedo could ruin him with the smallest effort, a move and design and it would be over. It would be done.

His mind hummed inside his skull; it resonated there and remained. Still, yet still.

Albedo pressed temple against temple, cheek against cheek. Nigredo was grounding, even like this. And his little brother was making no move to break free. (The loss of blood may have attributed to that.) Albedo understood what was being explained, but he kept to silence until Nigredo was finished. Until he spoke in a way Albedo understood.

If Albedo was more or less, he would have responded differently. He would have graced upset, moved to extremes. There was an easier solution here, one he could burn into another as much as anything. Albedo leaned back slowly, eyes dark and level as he stared at his brother. "As much as he and I, huh..." he repeated as if in wondering. As if to muse.

There was little shock when Albedo pushed more, nearly gently, firmly--unlike a time nearly two weeks ago, when out of desperation, Albedo had forced his way into something he did not yet know but needed to--had taken, grasped what was not given freely. Here, instead he curled around and sank into. With less effort that had taken that day.

Good. At least something would name itself as clear.

{I understand,} he sent, and the words came with sharp permanence. {However--} However-- {I am right here, Nigredo.} This was pressed, held--the concept that Albedo was not going anywhere. {If you let him, you would have left me. And I'm not going to let you leave.}

The rest was lacking words, pure in form, sharp in command, quiet in request. Stay. Stay with me.

[falseblack]

One might have tried. Tugged and pulled at waveform and found it utterly immutable. Ingrained past awareness lay an infinite constant, immortal as another, living in spite of annihilation. The rot was his own. Any change to his soul was what he permitted, and he would have permitted this one's (or the other's) designs. One might had tried.

Nigredo would have let him.

What came instead was a repeat, a musing. Green eyes slid to the side, vision blurring light and shadow to unrecognized forms. The smile dropped, and he once again remembered loneliness. {Yeah...} Everything to him but nothing he had intended to touch. He wished he hadn't spoken the last. Nigredo had meant for that to die with him, had he not?

But Albedo seemed to discern. Proved disallowing in distance as he pressed points the youngest had lost in transition. A part of Nigredo wondered how much was a product of blood loss. Perhaps his brother had already pushed him away, and this was only a petty comfort to a broken mind. If only the link could ever lie, he might have let it go.

The words came as a prompt of his own, however, and maybe (certainly) that was why Nigredo acknowledged in turn. He moved to watch his sibling, calm beneath what shone. {...Yeah. I know.} The hand that dangled lifelessly at his side reached to poke Albedo's nose. {I would have let him, but you stopped him.}

You saved me. Comforted despite wants, he was sure. Therefore, in light of the damage, it was fine.

He blinked. {I'm weaker than you are--} An echo. A fact. It should be obvious. {--and I am sorry.}

jsdhf the slide into gay.........

[purpletaint]

Nigredo only watched him, and Albedo felt the pressure of that gaze. Not of the weight but of the allowance. Nigredo had said it, but in other ways. Even now, hadn't he? The transition of words said and unsaid came to this alone: Nigredo would not live but for Albedo's will.

There was something empty in that, and there was loss somewhere deep within.

When Nigredo reached to touch, Albedo curled around his brother more. The arm supporting Nigredo came to grasp that hand--this putting them closer, inches between. The boy closed bright eyes, listening to what was said and unsaid both. Then moved Nigredo's hand to his lips, holding it there and breathing. As if having mortal brothers weren't enough.... One had decided to continue being suicidal as well.

Albedo's heart would break twice over at this rate.

He slid the hand to his cheek and held it there, then opened his eyes. "You can be however you are." The urge to break had lessened, a different one moving forward. To take care of. To protect. {You're weaker... And stronger in ways.... But regardless, Nigredo.} He blinked twice, the gave almost harshly. "I am here. You need to..." He looked briefly irritated at the choice of words, then continued. "Nigredo, call me. For anything. Whether it's an attack or if you feel poorly or if you're lonely." {I'll come to you.} Given more solidly than a promise. {I don't want you to be alone.}

[falseblack]

It wasn't quite apathy. It was a step or two below indifference. The reaction he carried graced closer to resignation, and yet, Nigredo knew the unspoken understanding was wrong. Wanting death was never the correct method; he understood this better than anyone. It was simply unavoidable when it came to him. Nigredo was far from one who wished for cessation, the end of existence. This was a byproduct of who he was.

And as much as he wanted to apologize for the fallacy, the child could not. Instead, he gently pressed fingertips against Albedo's cheek.

{I know.} Nigredo had known for some time now. Understood the willingness of his sibling to stay with him. {It was just bad timing. I was...} Caught off-guard, obviously. The fault of solitude, however, continued to lay with him, and Nigredo had nothing in excuses for that. {Tonight was discouraging. I really wanted to read with you.} Have some semblance of quality time, he supposed. {But maybe it was incorrect to expect nothing to happen in this place.}

Something within his chest constricted painfully. He sighed, pausing before twisting his lips in a strange smile. {Yeah. I'll do that. This won't happen again.}

[purpletaint]

For all points and purposes, Nigredo seemed almost at ease; apologetic and understanding of the scenario--the largest shown emotion disappointment. Any other would perhaps be relieved, assured by another's ability to shift to the situation. Yes. Any other. Albedo bypassed suspicion in a moment--that fact that his sibling was not fine was the single element of clarity. If one said they had no sin, they would be deceiving themselves--the truth would not be in them. Just as well here. There were facts but not truth, and Albedo knew the difference, knew the edge between them as well as the ways to reach between the particles of time and space.

And here, the little darling would give promises. Promises he'd likely break in a breath as he had here. For hadn't he promised to live?

But you understand that more than me, right? I would have let him.

Do you want to kill me that badly? I'll let you, if you want.

...Stupid. Stupid, idiotic child who was so happy to throw his existence away to the two guards of Hades. Still, nearly three weeks from that point and still, no-- Nigredo was not allowed rest. There were still two chained bullets, golden and dripping, to stain his path.

To say there was no sin would be disallowing truth, but how had it been spoken? That those sins would be forgiven or not, washed away in scarlet and snow. "Those who are forgiven little, love little." Ah, so that had changed. That aspect, extraordinary and not forgotten.

Nigredo had given him forgiveness and Albedo could offer his love. Here, it would hold and pause, and Albedo would let it. He breathed a quiet laugh against the air. "Kindred do commonly worse agree than remote strangers, isn't it?" He blinked at Nigredo, a light smile across his lips. There was loss there, irony and amusement and all of the things that made the entity's world go 'round. And yet there was care, soft and stable. Albedo closed the gap between them, merely inches away. "But you and I.... You're forgiven." Perhaps in this, perhaps he was as well. "And it's okay." He touched noses with his brother gently, then tilted downward to brush his lips against Nigredo's. Blood-covered both, and tainted one, and quietly breaking and broken in increments. At the moment, it was fine. In that moment, breath and beat alike, Albedo wouldn't have it any other way.

[falseblack]

There were many paths Albedo could have taken. Multiple reactions he could gloss over, enough factors to bring to ruin. They were what they were, and he wouldn't be wrong to let promises pass with his own brand of acknowledgment. Nigredo wasn't lying, but he must be getting bothersome. He had dealt his cards--all lackluster and empty in the way of will. To others, this would have been sufficient, but of course, Albedo would have none of it.

Thus, the youngest hadn't a clue. And what had come (a question and a smile) was dead last in his expectations.

His mind knew the quote before he could place the origin. Green eyes widened in surprise, the smile dispersing, and he found himself stuck in repeats. Isn't it? To have bloodily approved the ancient truth. Nigredo recalled with perfect clarity; for it, he could place blame on the entity laced in the waveform pressed against his. There was a shift here, and he couldn't say he knew the reasons. {It...}

It would be forgiven, his weakness. Albedo would touch him as though wanted, a mimicry of another night. He inhaled sharply as his reasoning diminished, and the child wasn't sure on its reality. {It is?} His expression crumbled. {I broke my promise. You know...} What you killed. It could not be so simple as that.

{You would forgive that so quickly?} It couldn't be so straightforward.