Day 53: Sun Room

[gald_digger]

When the intercom came on to announce the shift change, the feeling of dread returned. Anise had calmed down considerably since the morning, and she felt more ready to discuss the previous night with Ilia... but not as ready as she wanted to be

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[longlivetehking]

[It is very much okay! <3]

Scar had been in the progress of another attempt at removing the kitten from his person, but the little hairball happened to be much more intelligent irritating than he had anticipated. Nails dug into the fabric of the silly human clothing, indicating that the kitten didn't quite enjoy the idea of moving. An irritated sigh escaped his lips.

Great! As if he hadn't dealt with enough pushy yet persistent little hairballs to last him a life time...

What could have been a comical fight between Scar and the kitten was cut short, however; the former lion looked up from the attention-demanding kitten at the sound of someone clearing her throat. Taura. He left the kitten be for a moment, if only because he wasn't looking to make a fool out of himself by futile attempts to shoo it away.

"...is this about last night?" he asked, trying to sound nonchalant but not entirely succeeding. In truth, he was anything but pleased. If he had any say in it whatsoever, no one would mention the ordeal ever again. He did not need to be reminded of his brother or his torture session. Pity others may be unable to comprehend just that...

[ninelivesonce]

"Is it that obvious?" Her nose crinkled up a little bit in embarrassment. "I wanted to apologize. To both of you."

She looked away, then, her eyes a bit suspiciously damp. She hadn't had to tell someone they'd lost a friend before, even if she wasn't quite sure friend was the right word. Goad, maybe. That could be just as important in a place like this.

She'd have to get used to it, if she was going to lead a squad. No-one liked notifying family, but it was a reality, and at least von Karma might not be dead. Released could mean so many things. "The medtech," she said, waving a hand in the direction of the nearest knot of 'techs, who were coaxing patients into the already-crowded music room. "Said that Karl Fuchs had gone home. Mister von Karma, I mean. Did you know him well?"

[longlivetehking]

No, Scar had a secret talent to read minds. Of course it was obvious! Why else would she seek him out when not even a full day and night had passed? Still, he had to raise an eyebrow when she told him the reason for approaching him so soon. But he didn't yet respond to it, expecting her to continue speaking. He could wait with the 'I told you so' for a little longer, he supposed.

She did continue, but what she said...wasn't quite among his expectations. Though he was familiar enough with the institute to know that most disappearances happened randomly, it was especially strange since not even a day had passed when he had last seen the irritating man. And he had already disappeared? To say the news was surprising would be an understatement.

He wasn't certain whether to be disappointed or not. He had expected a little better of him, as far as his expectations of the fool would go for that matter. Last night had been degrading, humiliating, but...did that mean von Karma had just gone ahead and gave up?

On the other hand, he supposed it would save him from dealing with the aftermath, as far as that man was concerned anyway. Perhaps that was the thing he had most dreaded after last night; von Karma. Scar hadn't forgotten the incident the day after he had suffered through those sleep studies, and he didn't need to be put through such humiliation again.

"Well, that is...rather sudden," he responded, not certain how he was expected to respond to something like that. But if Taura expected him to burst into tears and woe this 'loss', he was going to be disappointed in her observational skills. It was obvious he cared little for the man, not much more than someone he would tolerate for the sake of convenience or his own personal amusement; the grand reveal of last night hadn't been necessary to make one draw to such a conclusion. Perhaps the only 'mourning' Scar would do about the man was that he would have to find a new victim to irritate; but there weren't many individuals here who had gotten so much on his nerves as von Karma. Either way, he saw no reason or advantage in pretending otherwise. It's not as though their clashing personalities had not been obvious...

"For what it's worth, I'd say we have at least gotten to know one another better overnight," he responded, his voice more than just tinged with irony. "Though I may not be the right person to discuss pleasant memories of him with, in case you weren't already aware."

[ninelivesonce]

"Ha."  A bark of laughter puffed out, unbidden.  Everything her shadow had said was both truth and fabrication at the same time; the same was likely true of the two others.  Whether they'd learned anything other than that everyone had secrets, and that the Dendarii policy that everyone's past was their own, to discuss or withhold as they chose, made a lot more sense.  From a practical standpoint, it was easier to respect people for who they were now, and a personal one -- knowledge was the most precise weapon in anyone's arsenal, and one of the few that could win battles without even fitting them.

As for the rest, Taura wasn't sure how to interpret that.  Had they been friends, or not?  People were so much more complicated than weapons.  Even grav lances only took five dimensions to describe; human -- or whatever -- had an infinite number of them.  Every time she peeled off one, ten more sprung up.

She wasn't about to burst into tears, either.  It was more that they had unfinished business, she and von Karma.  Last night was the chief, but if that could be dealt with, she would like nothing more than to hear him snap at her for giving the History Club one last opportunity.  Was it the right thing to do?  Was she putting unthinking loyalty above rational strategy?  Or was she merely making the best of a bad situation, putting her talents to woke where they had some chance, rather than no chance, of aiding an escape or rebellion.

I'm not ready to do this on my own, a voice inside of her wailed. That wasn't entirely fair, she had to admit; everyone was alone on the battlefield, even in a squad working as smoothly as a well-oiled machine.  Each cog had free will, and one false move by anyone, commander or raw recruit, could be their last.  It was the before and the after that were at issue; the times when she had too much time to think.  All of the things she'd done wrong looped in slow-motion playback when she closed he eyes; details she hadn't even noticed noticing.  Taka.  Scar wasn't the first name the man across from her had borne, and she could guess it's origins.  His shadow had used it like a weapon, just as hers had stripped Taura from her.  Why anyone would choose to give up a real name, she wasn't sure -- but he had, and she wasn't about to ask why.

Not when he was the closest thing she had to someone to ask for advice, right now.  How was she supposed to learn when everyone older and wiser kept dying or leaving.  At least von Karma had been breathing, if not thrilled with the situation, the last time she'd seen him.  He might be at home right now, finally able to have a decent cup of tea again.  Either as himself or masquerading as Fuchs.  If the latter, she couldn't bring herself to blame him -- even with a weapon he was ill-suited to this prison, more so than Taura was.  Armand, Homura -- her mentors seemed to be cursed.  She glanced around -- the patient/prisoners had, to an extent, sorted themselves out by age, this time voluntarily; still, Taura was unused to being, if anything, above the median.  It was one thing to bounce ideas off someone like Leela, whose enthusiasm had been infectious ; it was another to get a decent critique.

She sighed, and slouched down into a chair, negating as much of her height as she could without diving (literally) into the ridiculous.

"I just...wanted to talk to him, was all.  And I still have his metal.  I promised to help him get a weapon, and I couldn't even see that through."  she was well aware she was whining, and that it wasn't helping wash away the accusations her shadow had leveled.  Incompetent, untrained, bumbling taura, too big for grace, too ferocious for friendship, too old and too young at the same time. "I don't suppose it matters now."

[longlivetehking]

Indeed, she was whining, saying things Scar had little interest in hearing. He made some effort not to show his disinterest; he knew better than that.

Had such awareness been voiced, however, he would find himself agreeing. Instead, he released a sigh.

"It doesn't," he said, not caring if he happened to be blunt. "For still unknown reasons other than possibly his own amusement, the head doctor merely saw fit to release him." The former lion saw no reason to try and console her; it wasn't quite in his nature to do so. Especially not when he had to use whatever 'human' tradition appropriate for such situations. Some things were more trouble than they were actually worth.

[ninelivesonce]

"D'you think he bothers to send people home?" The thought grabbed at the strands of self pity she'd been weaving and yanked. Her chin jerked up, and her yellow eyes went wide. "Why would he?" True, Cissnei had gone home; Taura had been there, on that pretty beach, and maybe it was as easy as sending a comm message. Open a door across worlds and shove people through. Less cleanup than bodies, even, but it did seem awfully kind.

"I'm not waiting around to meet some unspecified criteria, never knowing which door might lead me home." Or out an airlock, explosively messy on the outside, but clean on the inside. No thank you. She waved a dismissive hand, her eyes narrowing at the sight of it. "I don't have time to wait around, and damn if I'm going to die in a place like this. I've buried enough friends."

The hand stopped wavering and slammed down on her knee, making a loud slap. "I'm cutting myself a better Deal. Starting tonight." She hadn't not been trying before, but she'd spent too much time trying to fit in and not enough trying to strike back.

[longlivetehking]

"Perhaps he does, perhaps he doesn't. Landel isn't one to share information, you know..." Scar answered, not quite enjoying where this conversation was headed, which basically consisted of Taura's whining. The kitten still sitting on his lap saw fit to play with a few stray strands of his hair, forcing the former lion to pull his hair from its reach while offering it a disapproving look. It didn't help much.

"Perhaps disappearing means that he's merely tired of you, that you're no longer useful or something like that. Perhaps it's the whole goal of this ridiculous game of his. Be as it may, I doubt he's doing us a favor by simply sending us home. Not to rain on your parade or anything..."

At the sudden revival of determination, however, he had to blink. "Well, good luck then," he commented, a somewhat dry tone in his voice.

[ninelivesonce]

Scar's first few thoughts echoed Taura's own, even though she hadn't bothered saying it all out loud. It sounded more depressing that way. That wasn't so much lying as prettying up the facts, really. They all knew the score.

And whether or not he meant the well-wishes, she'd take what luck she could find. She nodded, moving the conversation from personal to all-business with a single swift motion. "You'd be welcome to come along. I could use someone with experience in command." That was as close as she'd allude to the fact that she'd heard his shadow's accusations -- and the truth that had likely colored them just as hers had. He'd been a king, which was a lot more than a squadron, and nothing substituted for experience like experience. Negative experiences no obstacle; learning what not to do and walking away from it wasn't so bad.

[longlivetehking]

Scar had no doubt that Taura had heard what his shadow had so kindly revealed; her comment merely confirmed it. At least the female wasn't saying more about the whole ordeal than required, at least no more than necessary, which was something the former lion could appreciate.

"That would depend on what sort of 'Deal' you're planning on cutting," Scar answered after a moment. It would be interesting to at least hear what she intended to do, what she wanted to start tonight.

[ninelivesonce]

"First, getting in touch with Marc. Find out if he really knows anything. He's the loosest end in the bunch." She wouldn't mention Leela, not right now. She'd thought von Karma trusted Scar, but maybe she'd mistakenly assumed harmless back-chatter when there was genuine malice. Alarm bells were ringing faintly along finely-trained nerves. The enemy of my enemy is my friend -- as long as the battle still rages. But that said nothing about fellow prisoners-of-war from different conflicts entirely, locked up and connected by a gruff old man who lived to piss people off. Or at least that's what the fleet lawyers specialized in; tactical aggravation. Point it in the right direction and it was better than a plasma arc for cutting through red tape.

"Second, we've got to find a way up to the third floor. If I had to pick between going home and having my body back...to be honest, I don't know. But if one set of equipment is up there, what else? Those pocket wormholes we piloted ourselves through a few nights back? Even if we couldn't control where we landed, I'd jump." Better there than here, though Taura knew she wouldn't, now that she knew it to be possible, settle for anything less than home.

[longlivetehking]

"I may be pessimistic, but I do hope you realize that going home would be useless with the head doctor still alive?" Scar offered, unfortunately for Taura not sounding too impressed. "Even if you'd jump through some wormhole or whatever you call it that happens to lead you home, nothing would stop him from dragging you back. I don't know if you've noticed, but luck is not a very reliable force in here."

The same could be said of their original forms; if they were indeed located on the third floor...then what? Furthermore, no one had actually succeeded into opening that door, or finding another way up even despite the many attempts he had heard of. He didn't quite see why Taura would be any different, especially if she'd jump in anywhere without thinking.

If it all were so easy none of them would still be here.

[ninelivesonce]

"Yeah, I get that. I don't have any qualms about violence. Give me five minutes, and I'll have him in so many pieces they'll need a bucket, not a body bag." Glee lit her yellow eyes. "Maybe ten. The metal claws take a little time to get used to." Though they were something to keep in mind for back home. Taura's own nails could cut skin and a layer of flesh to ribbons (sometimes accidentally, which had been mortifying even if the fleet surgeon had promised her she'd leave no scars), but it took a while to hit anything critical if she wasn't going for face or throat. The claws, on the other hand, could go several inches at a time.

"But that's getting ahead of ourselves. We need to scout. Get the lines of communication clear, and have a plan. We make our own luck." Scar doubted her, it was clear. She'd doubt herself, except someone had to believe it. If everyone gave up, Landel won without having to work for it, and that was worse than losing.