I Hate To break It to YoulonejediAugust 6 2008, 05:51:23 UTC
It sounds to me like you're discussing reverse racism. You're right, it's a hot topic. Here's my take coming from a minority.
The fact is that we all have prejudices whether we think we do or not. Yes, your prejudices, whatever they are, may have shown in your words and actions, and you'd never know it. She may not have known how to express it to you. A lot of it may have been cultural (and yes, eye contact and how it's used can be a huge problem between two cultures, even co-cultures within the United States). The fact that you said that your university encourages "that ssort of thing" tells me a lot about your attitudes toward the concept of affirmative action and race. Maybe your attitudes toward race aren't terribly apparent, and maybe they're not even personal. My guess is that they're institutional in nature, and those are the worst and hardest to weed out. As to how they played out in your interactions with your friend? Who's to say. I don't have the whole story. It sounds like you had some issues that had nothing to do with race, at least from your point of view.
Here's the real deal about reverse prejudice of all kinds. the fact is that minorities have grown up in a society where prejudice is everywhere. And sometimes, it's hard to tell who goes there (friend of foe). Sometimes, they look alike, and so it's a matter of personal protection on our part. Yes, it can get out of hand, but there's usually some reason for feeling the way we do; these feelings just don't come out of nowhere. My guess is that, since she's in a university, she's becoming more aware of the real nature of the prejudice she faces, and so she sees it everywhere she goes, even when it seems altogether non-existant from the outsider's perspective. Since I've been reading more and more about the nature of attitudes toward blindness, I've been more aware of how sighted people really think about, and act around, blind people, and yes, I can see how I'd come off as altogether irretated or overly sensitive. It's a complicated problem deserving more space than what's available here. But the reality is that this perceived anger comes more from sadness and a all too keen awareness of the institutionalized prejudice built into our society. It's not your fault, so don't take it personally. Just become aware of how institutional prejudice and privilage affect you and your interactions with those who don't have the kinds of privilages that you do. Just think about it this way, your viewpoint of your situation may be entirely different if she were a different race, or even a race that was just a little more desirable than Black.
As to her personal issues, those are hers. Like I said, if she was a crappy roo mate, that's her problem.
The fact is that we all have prejudices whether we think we do or not. Yes, your prejudices, whatever they are, may have shown in your words and actions, and you'd never know it. She may not have known how to express it to you. A lot of it may have been cultural (and yes, eye contact and how it's used can be a huge problem between two cultures, even co-cultures within the United States). The fact that you said that your university encourages "that ssort of thing" tells me a lot about your attitudes toward the concept of affirmative action and race. Maybe your attitudes toward race aren't terribly apparent, and maybe they're not even personal. My guess is that they're institutional in nature, and those are the worst and hardest to weed out. As to how they played out in your interactions with your friend? Who's to say. I don't have the whole story. It sounds like you had some issues that had nothing to do with race, at least from your point of view.
Here's the real deal about reverse prejudice of all kinds. the fact is that minorities have grown up in a society where prejudice is everywhere. And sometimes, it's hard to tell who goes there (friend of foe). Sometimes, they look alike, and so it's a matter of personal protection on our part. Yes, it can get out of hand, but there's usually some reason for feeling the way we do; these feelings just don't come out of nowhere. My guess is that, since she's in a university, she's becoming more aware of the real nature of the prejudice she faces, and so she sees it everywhere she goes, even when it seems altogether non-existant from the outsider's perspective. Since I've been reading more and more about the nature of attitudes toward blindness, I've been more aware of how sighted people really think about, and act around, blind people, and yes, I can see how I'd come off as altogether irretated or overly sensitive. It's a complicated problem deserving more space than what's available here. But the reality is that this perceived anger comes more from sadness and a all too keen awareness of the institutionalized prejudice built into our society. It's not your fault, so don't take it personally. Just become aware of how institutional prejudice and privilage affect you and your interactions with those who don't have the kinds of privilages that you do. Just think about it this way, your viewpoint of your situation may be entirely different if she were a different race, or even a race that was just a little more desirable than Black.
As to her personal issues, those are hers. Like I said, if she was a crappy roo mate, that's her problem.
Just my two cents, since you asked.
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