Stalker Networks
Occasionally, at a party or social function, I will get a stalker reaction from people I have never met. I know their names. I know things about their lives. Understandably, the reaction usually comes from women.
I just figured it out. People simply aren't used to other people having a capacity for names, faces, directions, details, etc. I am not normal in that respect. I actually remember stories I've been told (though I may need a refresher on the details). I can remember someone's name two hours after meeting them at a party, while drinking heavily. It's always been like a neat "party trick" before social networking. Couple that with an ability to infer and anticipate from tid-bits of information, and I often know more than anyone intends from a simple response to a Facebook post.
I don't think of myself as different. I'm not obviously different from most people. My difference is--they don't know yet. It might be genetic or chemical. It's in my head. It's how I observe, process, and translate. Having been raised as neuro-typical, I think of myself as such. It never occurs to me that so many people can't do some of the things I take for granted (like remember three separate and custom orders when making the dinner run at work). It's as much a surprise to me as it is to the other person when I have one of these "stalker" moments.
In an age where people thrice removed are commenting alongside you on a mutual friend's musings, and where our social world is expanding at the speed of DSL, my memory and observation of detail have suddenly become creepy. We put our lives on display in ways we don't think about. When someone we perceive as a stranger suddenly reiterates or responds to the details of what we still consider private, we get a little "weirded out".
This social conundrum of sorts is not so bad for me, because I'm an open person and will generally share the details of my life with anyone. However, I can see where it's a problem for people who are trying to keep different circles of their world from crossing. Social networks like Facebook make that job harder.
Social networking web sites are yet another case of humanity leaping before considering the implications and ramifications of what it's doing. We really should start asking, "Should I...?" instead of, "Can I...?" Our technology is out-pacing our ability to adapt and integrate. In some cases it's out-pacing its usefulness. We're like kids playing war games with BB guns. We think we can handle it, and we think it's relatively safe. We accept the danger of a little pain. However, now and again someone loses an eye.
I just figured it out. People simply aren't used to other people having a capacity for names, faces, directions, details, etc. I am not normal in that respect. I actually remember stories I've been told (though I may need a refresher on the details). I can remember someone's name two hours after meeting them at a party, while drinking heavily. It's always been like a neat "party trick" before social networking. Couple that with an ability to infer and anticipate from tid-bits of information, and I often know more than anyone intends from a simple response to a Facebook post.
I don't think of myself as different. I'm not obviously different from most people. My difference is--they don't know yet. It might be genetic or chemical. It's in my head. It's how I observe, process, and translate. Having been raised as neuro-typical, I think of myself as such. It never occurs to me that so many people can't do some of the things I take for granted (like remember three separate and custom orders when making the dinner run at work). It's as much a surprise to me as it is to the other person when I have one of these "stalker" moments.
In an age where people thrice removed are commenting alongside you on a mutual friend's musings, and where our social world is expanding at the speed of DSL, my memory and observation of detail have suddenly become creepy. We put our lives on display in ways we don't think about. When someone we perceive as a stranger suddenly reiterates or responds to the details of what we still consider private, we get a little "weirded out".
This social conundrum of sorts is not so bad for me, because I'm an open person and will generally share the details of my life with anyone. However, I can see where it's a problem for people who are trying to keep different circles of their world from crossing. Social networks like Facebook make that job harder.
Social networking web sites are yet another case of humanity leaping before considering the implications and ramifications of what it's doing. We really should start asking, "Should I...?" instead of, "Can I...?" Our technology is out-pacing our ability to adapt and integrate. In some cases it's out-pacing its usefulness. We're like kids playing war games with BB guns. We think we can handle it, and we think it's relatively safe. We accept the danger of a little pain. However, now and again someone loses an eye.