To all of my friends ...
On a day like today - with my heart feeling OH so much - I thought I had to let some of this out.
If you are someone that I call friend - Thank You.
Thank you for being there, for calling me, for answering when I call you, for hanging out, for playing Pit or Uno, for laughing or crying with me, for listening, for talking or sharing, for enriching my life and making me feel like I do the same for you.
All-in-all .... (as the Golden Girls theme so eloquently put it) Thank you for being a friend!
Sometimes, it's just that simple.
In talking with people over the last 24 hrs. I've come to grips with the fact that while your 30's might be a time when you come to terms with who you are and become very comfortable in your own skin ... it also seems to be a time where you learn too much about life and death.
I apparently still have a really difficult time dealing with the latter.
Ever since I was 18 (maybe 19) and really dealt with death head on for the first time - meaning, someone close to MY age passing - death has been way too much of a reality and a hard concept for me to grasp. You might say, I have a fear of death (for myself and those around me).
I have always understood when it's time for elderly to pass from this life onto the next ... but it still hurts me.
I just can't quite understand why it seems to happen to people in my age range. I still feel very young - feel like there's so much more for life to offer me and my friends - WHY can it be cut so short?!
WHY?!
I know at this point I am rambling - so I'll get on with it.
"Your fear of death is but the trembling of the shepherd when he stands before the king whose hand is to be laid upon him in honour.
Is the shephard not joyful beneath his trembling, that he shall wear the mark of the king?
Yet is he not more mindful of his trembling?
For what is it to die but to stand naked in the wind and melt into the sun?
And what is it to cease breathing, but to free the breath from its restless tides, that it may rise and expand and seek God unencumbered?
Only when you drink from the river of silence shall you indeed sing.
And when you have reached the mountain top, then you shall begin to climb.
And when the earth shall claim your limbs, then you shall truly dance."
(The Prophet by Kahlil Gibran)
This is my wish for the people in my life who have passed from this life to the next:
"Congratulations! Today is your day. You're off to Great Places! You're off and away! ...
It's opener there in the wide open air. ...
You won't lag behind, because you'll have the speed.
You'll pass the whole gang and you'll soon take the lead.
Wherever you fly, you'll be the best of the best.
Wherever you go, you will top all the rest. ...
Oh the places you'll go! ...
Kid, you'll move mountains! ...
you're off to great places!
Today is your day!
Your mountain is waiting.
So get on your way!"
(Oh, the Places You'll Go by Dr. Seuss)
I love you all ... truly I do.