(perversion)
I haven't had a drink in a couple of weeks. I have one more day of medication. Then I have to get my tooth pulled... and then I can't drink AGAIN... this is for the better. I'm trying to live free from the cliche of letting old habits die hard - and just letting the old habits die instead. I am sick of feeling cheap and unworthy in certain hands,
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Agreed - so many people are guilty of the most wretched kind of game-playing, and I won't buy into any of it. Personally, if I feel like someone is trying to elicit a reaction from me (be it jealousy, anger, hurt) I will go out of my way to NOT react, and to feign disaffection. Game playing is hurtful manipulation, and I am sick of falling prey to it, and I'm weeding the people who do it from my life.
Yeah, it touched me that someone could and would look after me, someone anonymous and strangerly - and not have ulterior motives. Whoever the guy was (we've never spoken again - and I remember nothing of him except for his English accent and he was rather attractive) I hope someone is as kind to him in the future as he was to me. I've been quite sick lately and down on myself, fretting about having no-one to take care of and love me (yeah, the usual sadfuck loser stuff...), and when I remember this, not all feels lost.
I'm glad you remember that conversation... you do need to put yourself out there, creatively and personally, leave your mark. It's a pretty mark!
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