So I'm sure that there's some hidden timebomb waiting to go off in this car, and the rotorplugrodtreadthingy will probably disintegrate as soon as I drive it off the lot. But. The mechanic says all it really needs is new front tires and an alignment. And it's well within my price range.
So I made a deposit. And on Monday when my credit union is open, I will become The Proud Owner of this 2001 Mazda 626, lauded upon its introduction as "anonymous," "bland," and "serviceable." Which makes it the perfect complement to my wardrobe.
Huzzah for no more car shopping.