May 29, 2011 23:35
I need to lose 30 pounds.
That's over 2 stone, for you Brits.
However, I've been thinking: if and when I lose all that weight, will my problems be truly solved? Will I finally be happy with myself?
I think, probably not.
Therefore, I should be happy with myself now. Now!
Dad asked me last night, "Aren't you happy to be Sarah?" (He may have said, "Aren't you thankful to be Sarah?" I don't remember clearly since I was full of tears during that conversation.) His meaning in the question was more of a sense of whether or not my soul was happy to be placed in this body with certain circumstances and talents than how people generally mean that question to... mean. (oh dear... I can'tz rite.)
Yes, I am happy. I am happy to be Sarah, or to be in Sarah. I'm not really quite sure which one it is.
All day long my mind has been on church. Something didn't quite feel right today. I'll think more about it. Thinking is good.