I fail at life sometimes.
What does one do when they have a crush on someone completely unattainable? Not like a celebrity unattainable, but in a relationship and straight unattainable. It's still a fairly tentative friendship, we've really only known each other about 2 months, but I think I've fallen hard.
I think it is probably a very good thing that I'm going back home to work. I really want to make the friendship work, and I don't think I could do that if I were to stay here and have to deal with her in person with any sort of regularity. Distance, I think, will be my saviour here. Distance and a Star Trek kink meme to distract me. Screw the real world, I'm diving into fandom to make myself feel better. Healthy? Probably not. Effective? Christ, I hope so.
I really hope this is just one of my shallow, lasts until the next pretty distracts me crushes.
Is it because I am so terrified of being hurt that it is just easier to fall for people who I know will never want me back? Actually, it is probably exactly that given how much sense it makes for me to have abandonment issues. Why isn't identifying one's issues enough to make them go away?
I think it is probably a very good thing that I'm going back home to work. I really want to make the friendship work, and I don't think I could do that if I were to stay here and have to deal with her in person with any sort of regularity. Distance, I think, will be my saviour here. Distance and a Star Trek kink meme to distract me. Screw the real world, I'm diving into fandom to make myself feel better. Healthy? Probably not. Effective? Christ, I hope so.
I really hope this is just one of my shallow, lasts until the next pretty distracts me crushes.
Is it because I am so terrified of being hurt that it is just easier to fall for people who I know will never want me back? Actually, it is probably exactly that given how much sense it makes for me to have abandonment issues. Why isn't identifying one's issues enough to make them go away?