this is love that I'm feeling
Things People Say That Annoy Me:
- "Literally." I hate when people use the word "literally" (for the purpose of exaggerating) to the point where it's just ridiculous. "I could eat an entire horse. LITERALLY." Bullshit...I'd like to see you eat a fucking horse! You're speaking figuratively, asshole.
- Someone has been in the bathroom for a while, and when they come back someone else goes, "What, didja fall in?" Ha ha ha.
- "It's a proven fact." That phrase is just redundant! HEY, IT'S A PROVEN FACT THAT YOU'RE AN IDIOT.
- "No offense, but..." This almost always precedes something offensive. "No offense, but you're kind of a bitch." OH, WELL YOU SEE, NORMALLY I WOULD HAVE BEEN OFFENDED, BUT YOU SAID "NO OFFENSE" SO WE'RE COOL.
- "God bless you." Yes, the thing you say after someone sneezes. I don't actually get pissed off when people say this to me, but I just hate that everyone is expected to say it. I usually don't say it, which I realize makes me look rude to some people. I just don't get why I have to bless someone after they sneeze! Doesn't it come from some old superstitious bullcrap? I mean, I get that it has become a "custom" or whatever, but that doesn't make it any less stupid. I don't know.
- "I could care less." This only bothers me because when people say it, they usually mean the exact opposite.
- "Da bomb." Or even better, just "bomb." Example: "That party was bomb!"
- "Talk to the hand." (Accompanied by sassy hand gesture, obviously.)
- "...NOT!" Great way of faking someone out. "Your hair looks cute today...NOT!" Ouch.
- "Up your butt and around the corner." Ah, this used to be the perfect response to so many questions. "Where are my shoes?" "Up your butt and around the corner!"
- "That's what I always say!" This should be used after something you do NOT usually say.
- "Prove it." My brother used to do this all the time, and it was pretty annoying. It works especially well when you say it after things that do not require proof. "I have a headache." "PROVE IT."