(no subject)
My appointment on Thursday didn't really go so well, or I should say not the way I wanted it to go. I go on Tuesday for a trans-vaginal ultrasound which they stick a camera up my vajayjay and look at my reproductive organs, and to look for any abnormalities. If they don't find anything wrong there, I then have to go for an HCG test which is done at the hospital. For that test, they will insert dye into my uterus and cervix, to check for any cysts and whatever else they can find. If nothing is found I then move onto a low dosage of clomid for months 1-3 then if I don't ovulate or become pregnant within those 3 months I will go on a higher dosage of clomid for months 3-6 and hope that I get pregnant or at least start ovulating by then. If that doesn't work for me then we start IUI injections where I can at least inject Ian's own sperm and if those injections don't work then we try artificial insemination using another guys sperm..lol. sounds funny to say that. In the meantime I was given 2 cups for Ian to do his "thing" into for us to drop off at the hospital for a sperm test. Even though Ian is really uncomfortable doing it, I'm just happy my doctor's letting him do this at home and not at a fertility clinic.For my blood test, apparently they can only test it on the 3rd day of my period, so I have to wait til February to get my blood tested for them to test my FSH, LH, and some other hormone level. I can't believe how hard it is for me to get pregnant. The one thing I want in this world, the one thing that would make my life complete and make me the happiest girl on the planet, isn't happening to me. To make things even more depressing, it might never happen to me and I'm surrounded by babies, and constant pregnant people in Ian's family who have no problem what so ever getting pregnant. It's so depressing, and emotionally draining. I told Ian I want to take a break from his family for awhile, just to adjust to all this news I have been given and to get myself happy again. Which might not be for a long long time.