(no subject)
Resolutions? I hardly make them because I know myself, and unless it’s short-term and has a foreseeable end, I don’t stick to them. I need results immediately, and it’s easy to become discouraged. So then I usually give up, and hate myself for giving up. It’s a vicious cycle that I’ve finally come to terms with.
In general, though, I’ll say I hope to dedicate this year to my health and fitness. I can control my mind, now it’s time to control my body. I want to feel good about myself every day I wake up, and feel good about the exercise and routine I have put my body through when I’m falling asleep. I want to zip up my jeans, look in the mirror, and love what I see. I haven’t..ever..felt that way. Even when I was 120 pounds. It’s time to make it happen.
I hope to become a person who takes more action, rather than just talking about it. Sometimes I feel like the dog with the loudest bark, but when it comes down to it, I’m just a big phony.
I want to cut the “fat” out of my life. I need to simplify- materialistic things, friendships, my internet social life, etc. Half-ass friends, the three boxes of JUNK I’ve packed, my eight blogs.. it’s unnecessary junk and it’s exhausting spreading myself too thin.
I need to improve my judge of character, and let what happened this year serve as a major lesson in letting people in. I wear my heart on my sleeve, and although that sometimes proves to be an advantage, it has clearly failed me my last few times in entering into a relationship/potential relationship. I need to listen to my head more than my heart, even though I feel like that’s going against everything I’m made to be. I bring a lot of this upon myself. Falling for someone who lives 2,000 miles away, falling for someone who clearly can’t be trusted, having feelings for the boy in lab who probably doesn’t even know I’m alive. It’s possible to stop these feelings or ignore them before they start. This is not what I want to be concentrating on at all, so I won’t. I just won’t do it. This is my time and my year, and I really hate myself sometimes for letting any of this affect how I feel and spend my time.
I will stand up for myself more in the days to come. You will not treat me like a child, you will respect my space, and you will speak to me like an adult. If you don’t, and repeatedly find it impossible to, you’ll be out of my life until you can learn how to treat me as an equal.
And I hope to learn more patience with people. I know I am sensitive and passionate, and impatience goes along with that. I will try my hardest to be more understanding of other people’s stories, and continue to work on letting things “float” on by as they should.
So maybe I see these things as life goals. Something that I can continually work on, without limiting myself to months or a year worth of goals. If I fail, then so be it. If I mess up a few times in the process, it happens.
In general, though, I’ll say I hope to dedicate this year to my health and fitness. I can control my mind, now it’s time to control my body. I want to feel good about myself every day I wake up, and feel good about the exercise and routine I have put my body through when I’m falling asleep. I want to zip up my jeans, look in the mirror, and love what I see. I haven’t..ever..felt that way. Even when I was 120 pounds. It’s time to make it happen.
I hope to become a person who takes more action, rather than just talking about it. Sometimes I feel like the dog with the loudest bark, but when it comes down to it, I’m just a big phony.
I want to cut the “fat” out of my life. I need to simplify- materialistic things, friendships, my internet social life, etc. Half-ass friends, the three boxes of JUNK I’ve packed, my eight blogs.. it’s unnecessary junk and it’s exhausting spreading myself too thin.
I need to improve my judge of character, and let what happened this year serve as a major lesson in letting people in. I wear my heart on my sleeve, and although that sometimes proves to be an advantage, it has clearly failed me my last few times in entering into a relationship/potential relationship. I need to listen to my head more than my heart, even though I feel like that’s going against everything I’m made to be. I bring a lot of this upon myself. Falling for someone who lives 2,000 miles away, falling for someone who clearly can’t be trusted, having feelings for the boy in lab who probably doesn’t even know I’m alive. It’s possible to stop these feelings or ignore them before they start. This is not what I want to be concentrating on at all, so I won’t. I just won’t do it. This is my time and my year, and I really hate myself sometimes for letting any of this affect how I feel and spend my time.
I will stand up for myself more in the days to come. You will not treat me like a child, you will respect my space, and you will speak to me like an adult. If you don’t, and repeatedly find it impossible to, you’ll be out of my life until you can learn how to treat me as an equal.
And I hope to learn more patience with people. I know I am sensitive and passionate, and impatience goes along with that. I will try my hardest to be more understanding of other people’s stories, and continue to work on letting things “float” on by as they should.
So maybe I see these things as life goals. Something that I can continually work on, without limiting myself to months or a year worth of goals. If I fail, then so be it. If I mess up a few times in the process, it happens.