The Soldier's Wife [Day 24: Love]
~1~
They met in Fourth Form, at an all-boys’ school. That she was a student there made Dil very uncomfortable and angry, because she was not, in fact, a boy, despite what people may assume from her body. The boys at the school could tell that she didn’t belong there, so they went out of their way to make each day more tortuous than the last. She had a permanent bruise on her hip from the banister she was shoved into every morning on her way to history. Her books would often be missing pages or thrown in puddles. They called her Princess Prick.
One particularly eventful night, while Dil was sleeping in the room she had to herself, several of the boys broke in, dragged her out of bed, beat her, and tried to rape her in the hallway. Suddenly, fists were flying and one by one the boys scattered until all that remained was Dil crying on the ground and a boy she’d never seen before.
“Are you alright?”
She snorted a tear-stained laugh. “No. I’m Dil.”
“I’m Jody.”
~2~
They’d been friends ever since. They would sneak out at night and gaze at the stars together, telling jokes and swapping stories in a comfortable fashion that was foreign to Dil. It was the week before the end of the school year when she felt safe enough to put into words what she’d only dreamed before.
“I don’t want to be a boy, Jody. I don’t feel like a boy and I’m tired of being told I am one. I’m a woman.”
“I know, Dil.”
She turns to him in shock. “What do you mean?”
He has the Devil’s grin down to an art form. You’re much too pretty to be a boy.”
She can’t control the smirk this inspires, so she turns away coyly. “Be careful what you say, Jody. I’m very impressionable. Show Dil a kindness and she’s yours forever.”
“That’s the plan.” She spins around to see him suddenly in her face, reaching for her hand. “Will you be my girlfriend, Dil?”
She doesn’t trust her voice, so she nods instead. They kiss the world around them away.
~3~
Eventually, Jody went on to Sixth Form and Dil went to work at Millie’s. They were very open there, perfectly accepting of her identity, something Dil was still getting used to but finding less and less exceptional now that Jody had made her feel something other than fear. One day while Dil is in the back fetching something, a customer comes in. The receptionist says that Dil will be right out, and he sits in her chair. She comes out and sees her Jody pretending to be oblivious, which makes her chuckle to herself. She feigns ignorance and covers him in a smock.
“What’ll it be, sir?”
“Just a trim. Want to look dashing for my lady.”
She picks up her scissors and gets to work. “I get the strangest feeling she finds you always dashing.”
“Perhaps, but this is a special occasion.”
“And what occasion would that be?”
“I’m gonna ask her to move in with me.” It’s sheer luck that keeps her from nicking her boyfriend.
“I think you’ll find her answer’s not in question.” They smile at each other in the mirror.
~4~
They’ve lived there ten years when Jody reveals that he’s going to Ireland.
“You’re leaving tomorrow?! When the hell were you gonna tell me?”
“I didn’t want you to worry!”
“Of course I’m going to worry! How could you keep this from me?”
“Dil, I haven’t known that long myself. I just got the orders on Thursday.”
“You lied to me! You told me you’d never lie to me, Jody.”
“I’m sorry, love. I didn’t do it to hurt you.”
“You’re going to die over there! How do you expect me to get along without you? I’m bloody helpless without you.”
“You’ll be fine.” She starts to sob. Jody moves closer to try to comfort her, but she jerks away melodramatically and flounces on the bed. He strokes her back for a few minutes. “I love you.”
“You don’t love me,” she whimpers sleepily. “Otherwise you wouldn’t leave me.”
“I’ll never stop loving you. I promise.”
“They always leave me. Every last one.”
“I’ll miss you.”
“I’m meant to be alone.”
“You won’t be alone. I’ll be right here. Forever.”
~5~
And he is.
In many ways, Fergus is a lot like Jody. He can be a gentleman when he wants to be. He’d have to be to go to jail for her. He’s a little more oblivious than Jody, certainly a work in progress, but he means well. She’s glad that Fergus knew Jody, that to her great surprise, Jody kept his promise to be there with her forever through him. She’s glad he can understand why she never throws away his things, why she gets distant sometimes when she thinks of the only man to understand her implicitly, the only one who never once questioned her authority on the matter of her gender.
She tries not to think of Jody when she’s with Fergus, but it’s difficult, because sometimes he appears out of nowhere to both of them, the ghost they’ll never shake. He’s the one who brought them together, and they’re convinced he’ll be the one to break them apart one day.
Perhaps the biggest surprise is that that makes her happy.