(no subject)
Debate is a joke. And not the funny kind. If, for any reason, any of you are considering taking it -- don't. For our exam we were told to pick a famous speech, perform it in front of the class, and write a biography on the speaker. Okay, easy enough. Looking to do something interesting (in other words, not by Martin Luther King or John F. Kennedy), I decide to do the Sermon on the Mount, by none other than Jesus Christ.
At first, Mrs. Merrick resisted, but I finally persuaded her to let me do it (I beat the Debate teacher in a debate... that should tell you how much of a joke the class is). Then, today, she tells me she had a change of heart, and that I have to pick a new speech -- my first choice is just "too religious for a school setting".
First of all, that statement is just fundamentally wrong. I'm not forcing anyone to worship, nor am I trying to convert anyone -- I simply would have been reading a rather interesting speech. If people choose to take it as more than that, that's their prerogative. Secondly, if there was ever a class where controversial subject matter is appropriate, wouldn't it be Debate?
But no, Debate at Vero Beach High School is a damn joke. For one thing, we spent the first nine weeks not even doing debates, but giving speeches. I never rehearsed, never did research, and I never got lower than a 92. I made up every single fact on one speech and got a 96. I took my pants off during one and got a 105. I broke boards for my last speech and got a 92. Then we started "debating", if you could even call it that. Really, we were just giving speeches at each other. She butchered the traditional formats, and didn't bother to teach us any sort of logic. This Jesus thing was just the last straw -- I already had it planned out, and Arielle had even gotten me a Jesus costume.
But I'll have my revenge. Once she hears my new speech, she'll wish she had let me give the Sermon on the Mount. Since religion is apparently inappropriate for her class, I picked the most profanity-laced oration I could find: General Patton's speech to the troops before the invasion of Normandy. Here's my favorite paragraph:
"All through your Army careers, you men have bitched about what you call 'chicken shit drilling'. That, like everything else in this Army, has a definite purpose. That purpose is alertness. Alertness must be bred into every soldier. I don't give a fuck for a man who's not always on his toes. You men are veterans or you wouldn't be here. You are ready for what's to come. A man must stay alert at all times if he hopes to stay alive. If you're not alert, sometime, a German [this is my favorite phrase of the whole speech] son-of-an-asshole-bitch is going to sneak up behind you and beat you to death with a sockful of shit!"
At first, Mrs. Merrick resisted, but I finally persuaded her to let me do it (I beat the Debate teacher in a debate... that should tell you how much of a joke the class is). Then, today, she tells me she had a change of heart, and that I have to pick a new speech -- my first choice is just "too religious for a school setting".
First of all, that statement is just fundamentally wrong. I'm not forcing anyone to worship, nor am I trying to convert anyone -- I simply would have been reading a rather interesting speech. If people choose to take it as more than that, that's their prerogative. Secondly, if there was ever a class where controversial subject matter is appropriate, wouldn't it be Debate?
But no, Debate at Vero Beach High School is a damn joke. For one thing, we spent the first nine weeks not even doing debates, but giving speeches. I never rehearsed, never did research, and I never got lower than a 92. I made up every single fact on one speech and got a 96. I took my pants off during one and got a 105. I broke boards for my last speech and got a 92. Then we started "debating", if you could even call it that. Really, we were just giving speeches at each other. She butchered the traditional formats, and didn't bother to teach us any sort of logic. This Jesus thing was just the last straw -- I already had it planned out, and Arielle had even gotten me a Jesus costume.
But I'll have my revenge. Once she hears my new speech, she'll wish she had let me give the Sermon on the Mount. Since religion is apparently inappropriate for her class, I picked the most profanity-laced oration I could find: General Patton's speech to the troops before the invasion of Normandy. Here's my favorite paragraph:
"All through your Army careers, you men have bitched about what you call 'chicken shit drilling'. That, like everything else in this Army, has a definite purpose. That purpose is alertness. Alertness must be bred into every soldier. I don't give a fuck for a man who's not always on his toes. You men are veterans or you wouldn't be here. You are ready for what's to come. A man must stay alert at all times if he hopes to stay alive. If you're not alert, sometime, a German [this is my favorite phrase of the whole speech] son-of-an-asshole-bitch is going to sneak up behind you and beat you to death with a sockful of shit!"