journey home / slip sliding away
At a 99 B-line bus stop, on the way home tonight:
me: *waiting for bus*
guy in a green car: *pulls up*
me: *irritated again at drivers who stop in bus stops*
guy in green car, leaning over empty passenger seat: hey, you need a taxi?
me: *looks around to check reality* NO! I'm at a bus stop! And you're not even a taxi!
guy in green car: are you sure?
me: go AWAY!
Come to think, my first thought should have been "Not my profession of choice, thankyouverymuchnowfuckoffasshole"
I would have felt vulnerable had the bus stop been completely vacant except for me. As it were, there were 5 or 6 others milling / pacing around waiting for the next bus.
When I got off the bus, I noticed our friendly neighbourhood hooker. She is, as usual, wearing black patent platform spiked heel boots, cropped jacket and micro mini tartan skirt. I immediately thought to myself "honey, you're freezing your nethers off in that outfit and you could just wait at bus stops near VGH!"
Final thing: I didn't think I was going to make it home tonight. The thick fog, combined with freezing temperatures creates really slippery ice on our sidewalks and streets. Even though I was wearing my "sensible" runners, I started sliding backwards as I was only three houses from home. I was practically in the middle of our street where it starts to turn into a wide cul-de-sac and I was sliding backwards. I adjusted my stance and took sliding, skating steps to the side. I was maybe 4 metres from the curb and, more importantly, roughly textured grass! I kept sliding downhill, though, with every step. I kept thinking of the math problem where there's a bug in a well and it climbs X inches every day but slides down X-1 inches every night.
Anyway, there are places on our hill where there is no grass to walk on, only street, driveway or sidewalk. I started to wonder if I could phone Kris and get her to throw me a rope. As you can see, I made it safely, but my slow careful pace was not very easy. I did slide down almost a metre at one point, and there I was, moving sideways, arms outstretched, knees carefully bent, considering the possibility of crawling to the edge of the street. It is amusing, but I do wonder what KIND of shoes/boots I need for this neighbourhood. My new boots are not good at gripping ice. My pretty boots have a raised heel, so that's out of the question! doc martens? fluevogs? ice grippers from Lee Valley?
Maybe I'll carry some sand with me, too. There is a small pile down near the storm drain at the bottom of the hill.
me: *waiting for bus*
guy in a green car: *pulls up*
me: *irritated again at drivers who stop in bus stops*
guy in green car, leaning over empty passenger seat: hey, you need a taxi?
me: *looks around to check reality* NO! I'm at a bus stop! And you're not even a taxi!
guy in green car: are you sure?
me: go AWAY!
Come to think, my first thought should have been "Not my profession of choice, thankyouverymuchnowfuckoffasshole"
I would have felt vulnerable had the bus stop been completely vacant except for me. As it were, there were 5 or 6 others milling / pacing around waiting for the next bus.
When I got off the bus, I noticed our friendly neighbourhood hooker. She is, as usual, wearing black patent platform spiked heel boots, cropped jacket and micro mini tartan skirt. I immediately thought to myself "honey, you're freezing your nethers off in that outfit and you could just wait at bus stops near VGH!"
Final thing: I didn't think I was going to make it home tonight. The thick fog, combined with freezing temperatures creates really slippery ice on our sidewalks and streets. Even though I was wearing my "sensible" runners, I started sliding backwards as I was only three houses from home. I was practically in the middle of our street where it starts to turn into a wide cul-de-sac and I was sliding backwards. I adjusted my stance and took sliding, skating steps to the side. I was maybe 4 metres from the curb and, more importantly, roughly textured grass! I kept sliding downhill, though, with every step. I kept thinking of the math problem where there's a bug in a well and it climbs X inches every day but slides down X-1 inches every night.
Anyway, there are places on our hill where there is no grass to walk on, only street, driveway or sidewalk. I started to wonder if I could phone Kris and get her to throw me a rope. As you can see, I made it safely, but my slow careful pace was not very easy. I did slide down almost a metre at one point, and there I was, moving sideways, arms outstretched, knees carefully bent, considering the possibility of crawling to the edge of the street. It is amusing, but I do wonder what KIND of shoes/boots I need for this neighbourhood. My new boots are not good at gripping ice. My pretty boots have a raised heel, so that's out of the question! doc martens? fluevogs? ice grippers from Lee Valley?
Maybe I'll carry some sand with me, too. There is a small pile down near the storm drain at the bottom of the hill.