[Let's Read] Maintaining: Chapter 3 and Chapter 4

[daffodil_brill]

Index
Brill's Intro

Quest
1 - Family || 2 - Weakness || 3 - Regret || 4 - Preparations ||
Okay, remember when I said we’d be getting to the meat of this? Well, I was mistaken. But it’s okay, because I do like this chapter! I like that it addresses how Goku is the BEST DAD EVER, personally.
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Comments

[guardians_song]

"We’re going to re-visit a rule from last chapter--Show, Don’t Tell. There is so much that you can expand on from these three sentences. This show is all about the fighting--what it reveals about the characters, their personalities, and the utmost patience they had when they were stuck on Namek for two years.

The point is, show us punches being thrown. Show them all phasing out and in of vision while knocking out a few trees. Show us something."
To be fair, it could be that the author just couldn't write fight scenes, knew it, and decided to gloss over it rather than forcing an incredibly awkward scene. I can think of a few professional authors who would have benefited greatly from doing that with sex scenes.

"I’ll get to why later, but we’ll just say that the reason I want it to be a thing that happens is because (1) Kurogane can bitchslap sense into people better than Chuck Norris can, and (2) I’m a dirty, hypocritical pervert."
And then it turns into a threesome with Phoenix Wright?

"With that said, I do like that this fic is holding Goku accountable for essentially just going “KTHXBAI” at the end of the Cell Saga."
And one out-of-universe-reason - Akira Toriyama honestly thought he was wrapping the series up at that point, but the fandom basically shoved him into continuing with the Buu Saga. And then he tried to shift the main character to Gohan, but, again, the will of the fans demanded Goku back, and so they got Goku back.

Not that this is relevant to the in-universe stuff, but it goes a bit towards explaining his behavior.

"Given that Vegeta’s canonical behavior around Goku is to tell him how he’s going to fuck vigorously beat the meat of screw aggressively top knot ravish why are you cutting me off it’s practically canon defeat Goku in a long, detailed rant, usually describing what techniques he’s learned and how he’s mastered them."
Roy: I don't see where you're getting any of that... he just plans to, in a TOTALLY HETEROSEXUAL WAY, pound Goku for all he's worth, shoot off giant gobs of essence at his face, scream, moan, and grunt constantly, and exert his dominance utterly over the other Saiyan. In the course of it all, both his and Goku's entire bodies will bulge, stiffen, and throb with energy, repeatedly coming together and clashing with enough force to level mountains... What could be more heterosexual?

And aah, yes, THAT trope. ...I also find it mildly irksome that everyone's reacting a tad OOCly even to the trope (Vegeta going straight to SSJ rather than grabbing Krillin by the collar, Goku not openly chewing Bulma out for her behavior, etc.), but that's my pet peeve. Well, that's a discussion for when the chapter actually hits.

Looking forward to the Chapter 5 post!

[daffodil_brill]

That's likely the reality, and the truth is that she DOES get better at fight scenes as the story goes on. I was just pointing it out in general--sometimes showing emotion and character is better than telling us what they're feeling--or at least being descriptive in how they're feeling.

And I was planning on addressing it because it was originally you and one of my former LJ friends who introduced me to that! There are better and more effective ways of screwing a person up other than putting rape in. There's actually a moment coming up in Maintaining that can illustrate that point perfectly, and we'll get to that when it comes.

Also, kudos to you, Roy. I never thought I would be out-innuendo'd by a character with teal-colored text. As a reward, I just might analyze the sex scene where Goku and Vegeta destroy the bathroom with Super-Saiyan demolition sex.