herr hellmund strikes again....
the hausmeister of my building is named herr hellmund. he is tall, muscled, wears neat (as in tidy) button-down shirts with the sleeves rolled up to his elbows, wears a tool belt full of practical jangling tools, has frizzy greying hair, stinks like schnapps and has the sad broken blood vesseled nose of most german alcoholics. he freaks the shit outta me.
he is known in my building as being a gross lecherous drunk and has done too many weird things to too many occupants of my building that i don't even wanna get into it.
he once came into my flat to fix my radiator and stayed way too long, telling drunken story after drunken story to a very uncomfortable me who avoided asking him to come in and fix my radiator for months in the first place and suffered silently in my frozen german emptiness until i just couldn't any longer.
my doorbell has been ringing early in the morning and i never answer the door. running into brook the other day, who also lives in my building and also tries to avoid the wrath of herr hellmund, i learned that the electricity bill that i thought was included in my rent ISN'T, and now hellmund is on the warpath and is trying to collect money to pay the electricity bill, which in his case is ONE HUNDRED AND NINETY EUROS, and in my case will likely be more like seven gazillion canadian dollars, since i have lived here for going on 8 monats. SO i think these early-morning-doorbell-ringings are evil herr hellmund trying to collect! at it will be before he has numbed himself to the world by drinking schnapps! and i have 72 cents in my bank account!
i will have to adopt a disguise...
herr hellmund also (we so don't know how he actually did this and just love picturing him doing it) strung christmas lights around the gynormous evergreen tree in the centre of the garden in december, the lights circled around and around until they reached the very tall top. the idea of him on a ladder! drunk and reeling!
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he is known in my building as being a gross lecherous drunk and has done too many weird things to too many occupants of my building that i don't even wanna get into it.
he once came into my flat to fix my radiator and stayed way too long, telling drunken story after drunken story to a very uncomfortable me who avoided asking him to come in and fix my radiator for months in the first place and suffered silently in my frozen german emptiness until i just couldn't any longer.
my doorbell has been ringing early in the morning and i never answer the door. running into brook the other day, who also lives in my building and also tries to avoid the wrath of herr hellmund, i learned that the electricity bill that i thought was included in my rent ISN'T, and now hellmund is on the warpath and is trying to collect money to pay the electricity bill, which in his case is ONE HUNDRED AND NINETY EUROS, and in my case will likely be more like seven gazillion canadian dollars, since i have lived here for going on 8 monats. SO i think these early-morning-doorbell-ringings are evil herr hellmund trying to collect! at it will be before he has numbed himself to the world by drinking schnapps! and i have 72 cents in my bank account!
i will have to adopt a disguise...
herr hellmund also (we so don't know how he actually did this and just love picturing him doing it) strung christmas lights around the gynormous evergreen tree in the centre of the garden in december, the lights circled around and around until they reached the very tall top. the idea of him on a ladder! drunk and reeling!
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