Fic: Ron Weasley And The Purrfect Girl (1/1)
I had an odd thought.
Mark said to write it.
I am easy.
I wrote this.
I beg your forgiveness.
Title: Ron Weasley And The Purrfect Girl
Rating: PG-13
Warnings: Abandon hope all ye who read. Also, "Adult Content."
Summary: Ron has issues... issues of what, though, is the key.
Disclaimer: I own my own sick imagination, but none of the characters. If you read this, you'll agree, that's for the best.
Author's Notes: This stems from an offhand comment to bastardsnow the other day, an odd thought I had mid-day, a joke I made and then an order to write it. Yes, I'm going to the Special Hell.
- - - - -
“It’s your fault,” Ron said petulantly to Hermione as he backed away from the angry young woman.
“And how is your having this… this… ridiculous filth somehow my fault?” Hermione waved the aforementioned filth at Ron’s face. “This is unimaginable! Well, it’s imaginable but it’s certainly wrong. And to find my fiancé with such…” Hermione released a rather inarticulate growl of anger.
“If you looked at it, you’d know why it’s your fault. It doesn’t mean I don’t love you, I just…”
“You just ‘enjoy’ looking at this disgusting material and saying it has something to do with me.”
“Yes, no, well. They remind me of you when I first, you know, saw you as you,” Ron said with a hesitant look at his fiancé who had turned a rather frightening shade of red. “It didn’t take hold, you went back to being my friend right after, but I noticed you, sort of, then. Then the other month I was doing some work for dad around an odd Muggle book shop and saw… those.”
Hermione threw the brightly colored comics on the floor and stalked toward Ron. “So looking at those magazines and thinking about that incident turns you on?” Hermione’s question was not as loud as Ron expected, which worried him. He had expected her to yell at him. Maybe even hex him up oneside and down the other. But this low voice scared him.
Eyes downcast, Ron nodded. “A little.”
“We’re to be married, Ron. We’re a couple. We need to communicate if we’re to work. I’m mad at you for hiding this from me and shocked… but if this turns you on. Well… There are some spells.” Ron’s head jerked up to meet his fiancé’s rather mischievous gaze. “They’re far better than polyjuice and I won’t need to see a mediwizard later…”
“Really?”
“Really Ron. Now… let’s go to bed.”
“Okay ‘Mione.”
“And bring your favorites of the catgirl hentai with you. See what ideas we can come up with.”
thankfully the end
So, a ficlet... with a sequel in my head saying "Write me, write me, you know you want to write me you tubby bitch, write me!" I'm ignoring it.
Mark said to write it.
I am easy.
I wrote this.
I beg your forgiveness.
Title: Ron Weasley And The Purrfect Girl
Rating: PG-13
Warnings: Abandon hope all ye who read. Also, "Adult Content."
Summary: Ron has issues... issues of what, though, is the key.
Disclaimer: I own my own sick imagination, but none of the characters. If you read this, you'll agree, that's for the best.
Author's Notes: This stems from an offhand comment to bastardsnow the other day, an odd thought I had mid-day, a joke I made and then an order to write it. Yes, I'm going to the Special Hell.
- - - - -
“It’s your fault,” Ron said petulantly to Hermione as he backed away from the angry young woman.
“And how is your having this… this… ridiculous filth somehow my fault?” Hermione waved the aforementioned filth at Ron’s face. “This is unimaginable! Well, it’s imaginable but it’s certainly wrong. And to find my fiancé with such…” Hermione released a rather inarticulate growl of anger.
“If you looked at it, you’d know why it’s your fault. It doesn’t mean I don’t love you, I just…”
“You just ‘enjoy’ looking at this disgusting material and saying it has something to do with me.”
“Yes, no, well. They remind me of you when I first, you know, saw you as you,” Ron said with a hesitant look at his fiancé who had turned a rather frightening shade of red. “It didn’t take hold, you went back to being my friend right after, but I noticed you, sort of, then. Then the other month I was doing some work for dad around an odd Muggle book shop and saw… those.”
Hermione threw the brightly colored comics on the floor and stalked toward Ron. “So looking at those magazines and thinking about that incident turns you on?” Hermione’s question was not as loud as Ron expected, which worried him. He had expected her to yell at him. Maybe even hex him up oneside and down the other. But this low voice scared him.
Eyes downcast, Ron nodded. “A little.”
“We’re to be married, Ron. We’re a couple. We need to communicate if we’re to work. I’m mad at you for hiding this from me and shocked… but if this turns you on. Well… There are some spells.” Ron’s head jerked up to meet his fiancé’s rather mischievous gaze. “They’re far better than polyjuice and I won’t need to see a mediwizard later…”
“Really?”
“Really Ron. Now… let’s go to bed.”
“Okay ‘Mione.”
“And bring your favorites of the catgirl hentai with you. See what ideas we can come up with.”
thankfully the end
So, a ficlet... with a sequel in my head saying "Write me, write me, you know you want to write me you tubby bitch, write me!" I'm ignoring it.