(no subject)
My father taught me to play video games at the tender age of eight. For years I happily killed stuff with Doom and Duke Nukem. But something was always missing, and it wasn’t until my brother loaded me up a copy of the first Tomb Raider game that I realized what it was. Lara Croft was the first video game heroine. She was smart, independent, capable, and all around awesome (and yes, she had giant boobies, but for a girl who had been stuck playing characters like Duke Nukem, giant boobies weren’t really a problem). I wanted to be Lara Croft. I dressed like her, fell out of trees like her, rode horses like her, and for the first four, maybe five games, everything was awesome. And then…the movies. The horrible Lara Croft wannabe, played by Angelina Jolie, was a mockery of everything that made the games great. After the movies when the name Lara Croft was mentioned people thought of Angelina Jolie instead of the ass-kicking heroine of the games. The only redeeming quality of the movies was Chris Barrie as her butler (hot!). There are now eight or nine games, all following in the dismalness of the movie. But now, after years of waiting, there is hope. They have remade the first game! Time to break out my old red-lens sunglasses and brown ass-kicking boots, I'm going to bag me a t-rex once more!