Ten Months Later
Ten months later...I realize that no one reads this but me. And so because I know that no one reads this I am going to write what ever I want. I am still in school. I feel as if I haven't stopped going to school. Wait. It's because I haven't. I am kind of excited for this semester to end. I will be ready for it.
I am extremely anxious for the spring semester to start. I am taking 19 credit hours. I haven't taken that many since my freshman year. Mostly because I failed all of my classes, have since decided that there is no point in biting more than you can chew, and why take that many credits anyway? If I was going to fail all of the classes anyway it made more sense to just take it slower and get good grades the first time around. I am taking so many hours next semester because I really really really really want a degree. NOW.
I feel that it is time for my life to move on. Move on to Illinois, get out of mom and dads and have my own apartment, my own bills, and my own worries. I know that part of this is already being fulfilled. I have my own bills. Car, health, cell phone. And if I get behind in those, I have no money. And therefore start to worry. Those are my worries. It's okay though. There are solutions. I can cut back my phone bill to 70 dollars in stead of over a hundred. I can make sure I pay my car payment on time. And I payed enough on my health insurance to know that I'm covered till December.
I do want to get into my own apartment for several different reasons. 1) I'll be out of Mom and Dad's house. Not that I don't love my parents. Our relationship is just fine. I just want to have stuff like cleaning the dishes and doing the laundry be my responsibility and mine alone. I don't want to have Mom and Dad clean up after me any more. I don't want to walk away from the dirty dishes and think "Mom will get them". I am starting to feel like I am using them.
2) I will have to put up with people who aren't related to me. I haven't had to do that for 10 months. It could be really weird. Especially if they don't believe what I do. It could be hard to be the only one with high standards.
3) Outside of my mission, I have never been out of my parents home for more than 4 months. I'm 23. Come on, Donielle, get with the program. I don't know any 23 year olds who are still at home. I feel as if my parent's home, and Paducah, is a black hole that I can't get out of. I try and try but it keeps pulling me back in. The harder I try the more i find myself deeper and deeper into having to stay.
I have found that in the past 10 months I like change. I like to go places. I like to do different things. I like to date different people. Which leads me to:
4) I will have the opportunity to date someone outside of my "normal" circle. I will have the chance to meet new people. I won't be stuck with the same bums in Nashville who are too lazy to drive 2 hours to go on a date. I will have guys semi-close who "hopefully" will be willing to drive however far to come get me and to take me home, then drive themselves home.
I am extremely anxious for the spring semester to start. I am taking 19 credit hours. I haven't taken that many since my freshman year. Mostly because I failed all of my classes, have since decided that there is no point in biting more than you can chew, and why take that many credits anyway? If I was going to fail all of the classes anyway it made more sense to just take it slower and get good grades the first time around. I am taking so many hours next semester because I really really really really want a degree. NOW.
I feel that it is time for my life to move on. Move on to Illinois, get out of mom and dads and have my own apartment, my own bills, and my own worries. I know that part of this is already being fulfilled. I have my own bills. Car, health, cell phone. And if I get behind in those, I have no money. And therefore start to worry. Those are my worries. It's okay though. There are solutions. I can cut back my phone bill to 70 dollars in stead of over a hundred. I can make sure I pay my car payment on time. And I payed enough on my health insurance to know that I'm covered till December.
I do want to get into my own apartment for several different reasons. 1) I'll be out of Mom and Dad's house. Not that I don't love my parents. Our relationship is just fine. I just want to have stuff like cleaning the dishes and doing the laundry be my responsibility and mine alone. I don't want to have Mom and Dad clean up after me any more. I don't want to walk away from the dirty dishes and think "Mom will get them". I am starting to feel like I am using them.
2) I will have to put up with people who aren't related to me. I haven't had to do that for 10 months. It could be really weird. Especially if they don't believe what I do. It could be hard to be the only one with high standards.
3) Outside of my mission, I have never been out of my parents home for more than 4 months. I'm 23. Come on, Donielle, get with the program. I don't know any 23 year olds who are still at home. I feel as if my parent's home, and Paducah, is a black hole that I can't get out of. I try and try but it keeps pulling me back in. The harder I try the more i find myself deeper and deeper into having to stay.
I have found that in the past 10 months I like change. I like to go places. I like to do different things. I like to date different people. Which leads me to:
4) I will have the opportunity to date someone outside of my "normal" circle. I will have the chance to meet new people. I won't be stuck with the same bums in Nashville who are too lazy to drive 2 hours to go on a date. I will have guys semi-close who "hopefully" will be willing to drive however far to come get me and to take me home, then drive themselves home.