(no subject)
I knew you would do it.
Sometimes I don't know why I write things like that although I know I could hurt them...although it's just a bluff.
But if people don't respond on that bluffs properly it's useless. Yeah that's right.....if they just response with "okay..." or things like that although I think "Actually I know there is something different on your mind. Why don't you just say it if my words were painful or whatever?" Botling it up is easier yes. It's a thing I always do to people who are very important to me, not to hurt them but to find out what they are thinking if I was doing stupid things. If I really do such things is another matter...most of the time I wouldn't do it of course. I never made out with someone just for fun and even not if I was drunken. Well...do I really look like such a person? Whatever....I always do mistakes...but you know. Saying such things....it does make it easier for me....to come along with some situations......sorry...it may be a total failure...es hätte nie passieren dürfen. one of us is fine but both is too hard....when I am thinking further...there will be just painful times. That's why I hope it will turn out different. The next month will show it. Though I am looking so desperately forward to it...because if it will be like now...I will not be available to stand this...or maybe I do. Or maybe I end like I did with that other person. That would be something not forgivable. Talking too much...hurting you too much...saying such things...a sorry won't do it....but still...sorry..
this doesn't change the fact that right now I love you more than I could love anyone in this stupid world.....but that is a bad excuse, isn't it?
but for tomorrow I will have fun. Not thinking about everything and everyone just about the people being there..my dears and enjoying myself ^_^
For that graduation party I bought a lot of clothes today with my sisters....it was really exhausting :/ However it was necessarry xDD
Will be back on sunday evening then. have a great weekend, guys! :D
Edit: I need an emo tag XD
Sometimes I don't know why I write things like that although I know I could hurt them...although it's just a bluff.
But if people don't respond on that bluffs properly it's useless. Yeah that's right.....if they just response with "okay..." or things like that although I think "Actually I know there is something different on your mind. Why don't you just say it if my words were painful or whatever?" Botling it up is easier yes. It's a thing I always do to people who are very important to me, not to hurt them but to find out what they are thinking if I was doing stupid things. If I really do such things is another matter...most of the time I wouldn't do it of course. I never made out with someone just for fun and even not if I was drunken. Well...do I really look like such a person? Whatever....I always do mistakes...but you know. Saying such things....it does make it easier for me....to come along with some situations......sorry...it may be a total failure...es hätte nie passieren dürfen. one of us is fine but both is too hard....when I am thinking further...there will be just painful times. That's why I hope it will turn out different. The next month will show it. Though I am looking so desperately forward to it...because if it will be like now...I will not be available to stand this...or maybe I do. Or maybe I end like I did with that other person. That would be something not forgivable. Talking too much...hurting you too much...saying such things...a sorry won't do it....but still...sorry..
this doesn't change the fact that right now I love you more than I could love anyone in this stupid world.....but that is a bad excuse, isn't it?
but for tomorrow I will have fun. Not thinking about everything and everyone just about the people being there..my dears and enjoying myself ^_^
For that graduation party I bought a lot of clothes today with my sisters....it was really exhausting :/ However it was necessarry xDD
Will be back on sunday evening then. have a great weekend, guys! :D
Edit: I need an emo tag XD