*headdesk*
You know what's awesome? How I still occasionally get reviews from an Andromeda story I wrote three years ago and posted to fanfic.net:
in which Dylan and Rhade are imprisoned on a desert planet in an underground tunnel behind an invisible forcefield by a tribe of very short warrior women who want to use them as studs because they send all their good men to the surface to battle, so only the frail, short ones are left to spread their genes around, which of course means Rhade acts cranky and ridiculous (and claustrophobic! A claustrophobic Nietzschean, for God's sakes! one who objects to being used as a stud!) and finally must pretend Dylan is his gay lover, and he's very jealous of him...which works perfectly because Rhade actually IS in love/lust with Dylan, so obviously Dylan discovers he's a little in love with Rhade, too. (In my defense, who the hell wouldn't be, you know?) There might or might not be comforting massages, too, as well as a warrior woman collaborator who doesn't want to force them to have sex. Her name might be Hope.
Worst part? Other than this not intentionally being crack!fic? After all that insanity and UST and kissing and groping to prove we're gay and you don't want us for studs (my logic? Umm...COCK! Or, um, you don't want guys who aren't with the whole fucking women program in your gene pool to compound the problem? IDK), it STILL fades to black.
And I STILL get reviews. STILL.
Oh, desperate fandoms! Oh, fanfic.net.
in which Dylan and Rhade are imprisoned on a desert planet in an underground tunnel behind an invisible forcefield by a tribe of very short warrior women who want to use them as studs because they send all their good men to the surface to battle, so only the frail, short ones are left to spread their genes around, which of course means Rhade acts cranky and ridiculous (and claustrophobic! A claustrophobic Nietzschean, for God's sakes! one who objects to being used as a stud!) and finally must pretend Dylan is his gay lover, and he's very jealous of him...which works perfectly because Rhade actually IS in love/lust with Dylan, so obviously Dylan discovers he's a little in love with Rhade, too. (In my defense, who the hell wouldn't be, you know?) There might or might not be comforting massages, too, as well as a warrior woman collaborator who doesn't want to force them to have sex. Her name might be Hope.
Worst part? Other than this not intentionally being crack!fic? After all that insanity and UST and kissing and groping to prove we're gay and you don't want us for studs (my logic? Umm...COCK! Or, um, you don't want guys who aren't with the whole fucking women program in your gene pool to compound the problem? IDK), it STILL fades to black.
And I STILL get reviews. STILL.
Oh, desperate fandoms! Oh, fanfic.net.