BADFIC Contest Entry One
Titled: Love Song
Category: Unoriginal Fiction
Badfic Qualities: Absurd plot twists, lack of originality, Mary-Sue, groan summary, obnoxious author's notes, abusing characters because "I just don't like them ok?!?!?" and pairings that never should have been. Band AU.
Summary: Band AU: Sarah, Rex, Candy, and Robin are forced to perform a in a concert by their evil manager Jamal. There's lots of love and hate going around! Will the concert go well? Will Jamal get the money? Will they have a happy ending?!?! I know the summary's bad but the story's, like, really good! I write bad summaries lol.
Sarah Challis applied more black eyeliner. She tugged up her skirt and down her top. Then she grabbed her guitar and sprinted out to the wings of the stage, late again.
The opening band had almost finished their last song, and she and her bandmates- Rex, Candy, and Robin. Candy and Robin were dating, but had to hide it because of their manager. Their manager was named Jamal, and he had forced them into performing this concert against their will because he wanted more money, so Sarah wasn’t even worried that she was late. She shouldered her blood-red, hardcore, expensive guitar and said over her shoulder, “Yo. Let’s rock.”
As they walked on the opening band, True Death, walked off the stage. The lead singer, Shell, grabbed her by the wrist. “Hey babe,” he said seductively. “Meet me later.”
Sarah laughed at him. “Like you think you’re good enough for me,” she said bitingly, and stepped on his toes hard as she tore away.
“Damn,” he said regretfully, snapping his fingers and watching her longingly with his gorgeous, deep green eyes. (A/N: OMG I WOULD TOTALLY DATE SHELL. HE’S SO HOTT. Lol. His eyes totally remind me of my ex- he had such pretty eyes, and he asked me out so nice! We were so. Cute. Together!!! But then, my like totally psycho friend- she’s sooooo ugly too, I was just her pity friend- kissed him at a party, and they had sex. So I totally broke up with him right as soon as my sister’s best friend’s boy toy’s driver’s son’s transvestite lover told me.)
Esperanza and Hiro, his fellow band mates, patted his shoulder compassionately. “Don’t worry,” Esperanza said, “She’ll come around. Here, she dropped this. Return it to her after the show and ask her to an after party then.”
“Okay,” Shell said sadly, “I’ll do my best.” (OMG KAWAIIIIIIIII!!!! I LOVE YOU SHELL1!1 I’LL DATE YOU IF SARAH DOES IT AGAIN!!)
Meanwhile, Sarah was getting booed on stage. Her singing was horrible, even though she was famous as a musical prodigy. The only song she did well were a love song, and Shell felt his heart slowly break as she sand words he wished were directed at him. Finally Rex stopped her. He said (lol I don’t know what gender Rex is so I’ll use he), “Sarah, we’re going to have to replace you as lead singer. You can do back up.”
“What?” Sarah shrieked. “How dare you?” As Sarah was pulled off towards the side, a beautiful, busty blonde strode on from the wings. She and Rex kissed passionately, then she took Sarah’s place and everyone liked her a lot more. (Okay so I know Sarah probably wouldn’t be bad or anything but I thought she deserved it because she was such a cold bitch to Shell and broke his heart.)
Later, after the concert was done, Shell went to Sarah’s dressing room. He knocked on the door, then stood nervously twisting his leather spiked cuffs until Sarah opened up. Her heavy eye makeup was streaked down her face, making it obvious that she had been sobbing before.
“Oh, Sarah,” said Shell tragically, and embraced her. “I’m so sorry, Sarah.” Sarah burst into tears again, crying on his shoulder, until he lifted her head and kissed her. They kissed forever and ever (A/N: WOOO GO SHELL!) until finally Sarah pulled away for air, stars in her eyes.
“I’m so sorry, Shell,” she said breathlessly, “for being mean. I was just trying to deny my true feelings for you!”
“No, Sarah,” said Shell, “I forgive you.”
“I love you!” they said together, and kissed again.
“Sarah!” cried Rex excitedly, running into the room. “Jamal died!” (A/N: YEEESSS! I really hate him!)
“What?!?!?” cried Sarah, breaking away from Shell. “How?”
“He cut his wrists because he thought the show failed and he lost money! But really, he miscounted and we made a ton!” screamed Rex.
“OH MY GOD WE’RE RICH!” Candy yelled, also running into the room and dragging Robin behind her. “LET’S GO CELEBRATE!” She kissed Robin openly, now that Jamal was dead.
The two bands became rock legends, with Sarah as lead singer cause she got way better, and Sarah and Shell lived happily ever after and had a ton of kids.
A note from the Author: In retrospect, I should never have allowed Smoke to make me do this. I am embarrassed to have such a thing on the internet under my name. Every word of this hurt my soul.
Category: Unoriginal Fiction
Badfic Qualities: Absurd plot twists, lack of originality, Mary-Sue, groan summary, obnoxious author's notes, abusing characters because "I just don't like them ok?!?!?" and pairings that never should have been. Band AU.
Summary: Band AU: Sarah, Rex, Candy, and Robin are forced to perform a in a concert by their evil manager Jamal. There's lots of love and hate going around! Will the concert go well? Will Jamal get the money? Will they have a happy ending?!?! I know the summary's bad but the story's, like, really good! I write bad summaries lol.
Sarah Challis applied more black eyeliner. She tugged up her skirt and down her top. Then she grabbed her guitar and sprinted out to the wings of the stage, late again.
The opening band had almost finished their last song, and she and her bandmates- Rex, Candy, and Robin. Candy and Robin were dating, but had to hide it because of their manager. Their manager was named Jamal, and he had forced them into performing this concert against their will because he wanted more money, so Sarah wasn’t even worried that she was late. She shouldered her blood-red, hardcore, expensive guitar and said over her shoulder, “Yo. Let’s rock.”
As they walked on the opening band, True Death, walked off the stage. The lead singer, Shell, grabbed her by the wrist. “Hey babe,” he said seductively. “Meet me later.”
Sarah laughed at him. “Like you think you’re good enough for me,” she said bitingly, and stepped on his toes hard as she tore away.
“Damn,” he said regretfully, snapping his fingers and watching her longingly with his gorgeous, deep green eyes. (A/N: OMG I WOULD TOTALLY DATE SHELL. HE’S SO HOTT. Lol. His eyes totally remind me of my ex- he had such pretty eyes, and he asked me out so nice! We were so. Cute. Together!!! But then, my like totally psycho friend- she’s sooooo ugly too, I was just her pity friend- kissed him at a party, and they had sex. So I totally broke up with him right as soon as my sister’s best friend’s boy toy’s driver’s son’s transvestite lover told me.)
Esperanza and Hiro, his fellow band mates, patted his shoulder compassionately. “Don’t worry,” Esperanza said, “She’ll come around. Here, she dropped this. Return it to her after the show and ask her to an after party then.”
“Okay,” Shell said sadly, “I’ll do my best.” (OMG KAWAIIIIIIIII!!!! I LOVE YOU SHELL1!1 I’LL DATE YOU IF SARAH DOES IT AGAIN!!)
Meanwhile, Sarah was getting booed on stage. Her singing was horrible, even though she was famous as a musical prodigy. The only song she did well were a love song, and Shell felt his heart slowly break as she sand words he wished were directed at him. Finally Rex stopped her. He said (lol I don’t know what gender Rex is so I’ll use he), “Sarah, we’re going to have to replace you as lead singer. You can do back up.”
“What?” Sarah shrieked. “How dare you?” As Sarah was pulled off towards the side, a beautiful, busty blonde strode on from the wings. She and Rex kissed passionately, then she took Sarah’s place and everyone liked her a lot more. (Okay so I know Sarah probably wouldn’t be bad or anything but I thought she deserved it because she was such a cold bitch to Shell and broke his heart.)
Later, after the concert was done, Shell went to Sarah’s dressing room. He knocked on the door, then stood nervously twisting his leather spiked cuffs until Sarah opened up. Her heavy eye makeup was streaked down her face, making it obvious that she had been sobbing before.
“Oh, Sarah,” said Shell tragically, and embraced her. “I’m so sorry, Sarah.” Sarah burst into tears again, crying on his shoulder, until he lifted her head and kissed her. They kissed forever and ever (A/N: WOOO GO SHELL!) until finally Sarah pulled away for air, stars in her eyes.
“I’m so sorry, Shell,” she said breathlessly, “for being mean. I was just trying to deny my true feelings for you!”
“No, Sarah,” said Shell, “I forgive you.”
“I love you!” they said together, and kissed again.
“Sarah!” cried Rex excitedly, running into the room. “Jamal died!” (A/N: YEEESSS! I really hate him!)
“What?!?!?” cried Sarah, breaking away from Shell. “How?”
“He cut his wrists because he thought the show failed and he lost money! But really, he miscounted and we made a ton!” screamed Rex.
“OH MY GOD WE’RE RICH!” Candy yelled, also running into the room and dragging Robin behind her. “LET’S GO CELEBRATE!” She kissed Robin openly, now that Jamal was dead.
The two bands became rock legends, with Sarah as lead singer cause she got way better, and Sarah and Shell lived happily ever after and had a ton of kids.
A note from the Author: In retrospect, I should never have allowed Smoke to make me do this. I am embarrassed to have such a thing on the internet under my name. Every word of this hurt my soul.